Chapter 15 Robin arrived home to find Brenda sitting the couch staring into space. She came home and found her best friend like that countless times before. She was thinking about Sonny. "Hey Bren. I thought you would be asleep by now. It's late. I hope you weren't waiting for me." "Not really. I was wondering where you were though." "I had somethings to do." What she really wanted to say was that she'd seen Sonny but she couldn't. Not yet. "Oh, well I just put Stone down. I was about to go to bed." "Do you want to talk about it?" Brenda smiled to herself. Robin knew she was thinking of him. She always did, especially having Stone around as a constant reminder. She'd have left Port Charles a long time ago if she didn't have Stone. Move someplace that didn't have any memoriess of Sonny. She loved Stone with all her heart but she always felt a pang of hurt, regrets and pain when she looked at her son but mostly an overwhelming amount of love. All her friends were here. The ones that counted. Mike, Lois, Ned and Robin. Stone needed family and to be surrounded by people who cared. Something she never had. She wanted to give her son everything she didn't have growing up. She did whatever she could but it didn't make up for the fact that Stone didn't have two parents who loved each other and him. He wouldn't have a father. She never had one or at least one that cared and not just threw money at her and shipped her off to boarding school. "No. Actually I do. I just want to get it all out but it hurts too much to talk about it or even think about it. I worked through everything I could with Kevin's help. He's a good doctor. I just need answers about why. The only person who can say is Sonny and for all I know i'll never see him again. He could be dead or someplace with someone else. Do you think that he's married now and has a family of his own ?" Brenda's mind started filling up with unwelcome images of Sonny with another woman and their children. "Brenda stop it. You'll drive yourself crazy thinking like that. Sonny loved you. You are his family. You and Stone. Even if he doesn't know. That doesn't change anything." "How do you know he loved me ? It was probably all a big lie." "Because I do know. I watched you two fall in love. I've seen you guys together. He was happy with you. You were happy together. When you guys were getting married I could hear how happy Sonny was in his voice." "I don't know..." "I do. So did Stone. He knew you guys belonged together. Stone was closer to Sonny than any of us and he knew that. Stone knew Sonny and he knew he loved you. I won't let you disgrace his memory like that." Brenda notices her 'little sister' getting upset and gets up to give her a hug. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. Stone did know Sonny best. Maybe he did love me at one time. He just stopped. It all got to be too much and he realized he was making a mistake and Sonny backed out. It wasn't enough. I wasn't enough. We weren't enough." Chapter 16 "I still think you're wrong." "But you don't know for sure. The only one who can tell me is Sonny and he's not here." Robin thought to herself. But I do know Bren, I saw him after the wedding in Paris. He was miserable. He loves you so much. I just saw him at the penthouse. He's still miserable. There will never be anyone else for him just like there'll never be anyone else for you. She wanted to say this to her best friend so much. Her heart was screaming at her to say it but she couldn't. Now wasn't the right time but when is the right time she asked herself. "Bren, for all you know Sonny could be sitting in his house hurting as much as you. Maybe worse." Brenda wipes the tears that were streaming down her face away. "You know you should probably get some sleep. You need your rest." "I need my best friend too. " "I know. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to dump everything on you. You should stay away from me when i'm feeling sorry for myself. I hate when I get like this." "Don't apologize. You are who you are. I love you." "I love you too. You know you're probably one of the biggest things keeping me sane. Without you and Stone i'd probably be going crazy in this house by myself." "You're helping me too. With Mac back together with Felicia and living at the Brownstone i'd probably be going stir-crazy in that house filled with memories of Stone and Jason." "I know how you feel. I went to our old apartment above Luke's. Remember when Lucy had that brilliant idea to have the shoot there and I actually agreed ? I just stood there. All the memories came flooding back. I could relive every second we spent there, even the bad times like when I was shot at in the shower. That's when things started to change for us. You still remember that night when Jason was shot by the tin man don't you ?" Robin nodded sadly. "That's when things went bad for us too. I wanted him to quit but he wouldn't. Imade Sonny fire him and it was the wrong way to handle it. I wanted to protect him but you can't protect someone from themselves. You tried to prtect Sonny by wearing that wire but it was the wrong way to handle it. " "We were doing the same exact things for the right reasons. Look where it got us. We lost the men we love. " "But they're still alive. I regret asking Sonny to do it but I don't regret trying to protect Jason. At least they're breathing." "Jason is. I don't know if Sonny is. Do you know that he could be sick or dying right this second and I wouldn't even know. I could always tell if there was trouble or if he was hurt. Now I don't think I can any,ore. Our connection is broken. That love that always pulled us together is gone. Do you think that means i'm over him?" Brenda was mostly just talking aloud. She knew deep down that she'd always love him.For no other reason than she did. He was the only man she'd ever really loved. The first man she'd ever loved and the man who taught her how to love. "Brenda..." "I know. Don't dwell on it. I'll always love him for giving me Stone and we'll always be connected through our son. All that love and those few months that we were happy together doesn't wipe out all that pain though." "You'll always be connected through Stone." "I know. Even if Sonny doesn't know about his son. " He will soon enough, Robin thought to herself. Chapter 17 Robin went upstairs to go to bed. Brenda is downstairs turning out the lights and thinking. Upstairs. Robin closes the door to her room and turns on the light. **Flashback** "Sonny?" Robin calls out to a dark figure in the shadows. "Yeah, it's me" Robin rushes over to him and hugs him. "What happened ? I was so worried about you." "I'm okay. Don't worry about me. I can take care of myself." "Is that what you're doing because you look horrible." "Thanks." "I'm serious. When are you going back for Brenda ?" Robin knew what his response would be. The bad feeling in the pit of her stomach gave her the answere but she had to hear him say it. "No." "I heard what happened but I didn't believe it. Not at first. What went wrong ? I know you loved her." "I love her with all my heart but I couldn't put her in danger. I couldn't risk her life like that." **Reality** "Oh god Brenda. If you only knew the truth." Chapter 18 Brenda is still downstairs. She walks over to the stereo and turns it on, putting the volume on low so she wouldn't wake up Stone or Robin in case she was asleep. Across town Sonny is lisiening to the same station, staring out the window like he's done countless times before. A sad love song comes on. "Figures." he mutters to himself I really don't feel like talking on the phone And I really don't feel like company at home Lately I don't want to do the things I used to do Baby since I lost you Brenda sinks down on the couch and starts to cry. "I still think Robin was wrong but i'll never know will I sonny." she whispered to herself. "Oh god, I want so much to move on with my life but I can't without you. Why did you leave me like that. Why couldn't you just love me?" And I don't want to sing another love song babe I don't want to hum another melody I don't want to live my life without you babe yeah It's driving me crazy(crazy) I really don't feel like smiling anymore And I haven't had the peace to sleep at all Ever since you went away, baby my whole life has changed I don't want to live my life without you yeah, babe It's driving me crazy(crazy) "Oh god Brenda. I came back because things are safe now. I should've stayed away but I can't go on without you. I can't sleep or do anything without you by my side. Please understand and take me back. If I have to beg I will. I need you back. I won't screw it up this time. I promise. Please give me another chance. It can't be over." I don't wanna laugh, I don't wanna play I don't wanna talk, I have nothing to say I don't want to tour, forget the show how can I go on Now that you are gone "You're gone Sonny. I know you're probably never coming back. I have to accept that. It's just too hard nut what if Robin's right. Maybe you are out there suffering as much as me." And I don't want to sing another love song babe I don't want to hum another melody I don't want to live my life without you babe yeah It's driving me crazy (crazy) Stop it Brenda. It's almost midnight and you're talking to yourself. He's gone and he's never coming back. Face it and move on. She kept trying to tell herself that but her heart wouldn't listen. Brenda turns off the radio and the lights then goes upstairs and gets ready for bed. Sonny is doing the exact same thing in his penthouse. Forget it man. She probably hates you. She put her life back together after you destroyed it. She won't care if you're back or not. In his mind he knew she probably did hate him but his heart was telling him there was still a chance and it wasn't over. He had to get her back. There hadto be some hope for them. They didn't go through everything they did to have it end like this. It couldn't be over. Chapter 19 Robin was trying to tell Brenda that Sonny was back in Port Charles but Brenda was really upset so Robin decided to wait. After a goodnight's rest, Robin finally worked up the courage to tell her best friends the news. She takes a shower and then gets dressed. Brenda is downstairs already. The next morning Robin comes downstairs to find Brenda in the kitchen ( I know but since she's a mother now she should know how to cook so lets say she learned from someone). "Good morning Robin." Brenda is bubbly and really cheerful "You're in a good mood today Bren." "Why shouldn't I be ? I have L&B, Lois, Ned, you and my beautiful son who actually slept all night and is still sleeping as we speak." "That's good. Want me to go get him ?" "No, i'll do it but thanks anyway.You can stay here and finish making breakfast." "Gee Thanks." Robin makes a face. Brenda smiles "You're welcome. " "At least it'll be edible." "Haha Robin. I thought you said my cooking was getting better." "Better than what ? No i'm kidding. You are getting better." "Thank you." Brenda pours them each a cup of coffee smiling to herself. She's so happy. If I tell her about Sonny it'll tear her world apart again. She'a almost got everything together, she thought to herself. Her life is right where she wants it. I have to tell her. She'll find out eventually. Now is better than later. Brenda's strong. She can deal with this and then move on. I have to tell her...but how ? Robin watched as Brenda went upstairs to get her son. A half-hour later Robin finishes making breakfast and Brenda comes back down with a dressed and cleaned up Stone. Chapter 20 "Stone looks like he's ready to go out." "He is. We're heading over to the gatehouse later. I've got some things to go over with Lois and Ned is getting back from Jakarta today." "That's good. I hope Ned solved his business problem" "So do I. What are you doing today Robin ?" " Since I won't be watching Stone I have time to go see Uncle Mac then I'm going with Felicia to get our dresses fitted for their wedding. " "Well, just make sure that she doesn't pick out hideous dresses for the bridesmaids." "Felicia has good taste. She is marrying Uncle Mac." "Yeah." "Breakfast is getting cold. Let's eat because i've got something to tell you then i've got to run." "Why don't you just tell me now ?" "It can wait an hour. Let's eat." "Okay" Robin and Brenda chat about the wedding and some other stuff. Brenda is trying to feed Stone his breakfast but he's real fussy. The phone rings. "Robin, why don't you answer that ? I left some papers upstairs that I need to get." Robin answers the phone while Brenda goes back upstairs to get the L&B business files. "Oh Hi Mac. No...Yes. I'm going over there later...I know...I'll make sure Felicia-" Brenda came downstairs and heard bits and pieces of Robin's conversation. She was happy that Robin was getting a family and that Mac and Felicia had finally got it together after so many tries but it hurt to much to talk about weddings. All of hers were ruined... by Sonny. She couldn't take it anymore. She rushed out the door with Stone. "Robin, i'm running late. I'll talk to you later." she called to her best friend. "No Brenda wait !!!" It was too late. She was gone. "No Uncle Mac i was talking to Brenda but she left. " Robin returned to her phone call while praying that Brenda didn't run into Sonny. In the car Brenda remembered that Robin had something to tell her. "Oh well. It couldn't have been that important. " Chapter 21 The Gatehouse "Hey Lois. How's my beautiful goddaughter ?" "She's great. We're playing dollies. She loved the one you got her." "That's good. Come on Stone. You want to play with Brooke huh ?" Brenda leans down and sets Stone on the floor near Brooke. "How's my handsome godson? He looks good." "He is. We both are doing good." "Here let me play with him for awhile then we can talk shop." "Okay." Lois and Brenda set the kids down on a blanket with their toys. Brenda gets all of her papers out of her briefcase and she and Lois go through them. They set up some concerts and book studio time. After a few minutes Brenda speaks. "I like this" "What ? the statements ?" "NO! This ! We're sitting here in your home with our kids playing together. This is nice. Like we're a family." "Girlfriend, we are family. We're like sisters and that's saying something considering i've got all brithers and you have Julia. Are you getting sappy on me ?" "I don't know. I didn't have much of a childhood and I want my son to have everything. He does the cutest things and I'm the only one around to be amazed sometimes. I didn't really have anyone but now I have you, Ned, Robin and Mike." Stone's got you guys too." "You better watch what you say. We're going to spoil that little boy like crazy with attention and love. Especially Ned and me. We love him just like our own just like you love Brooke." "I love you guys" "Aw. We love you too. Come here girlfriend." Both of them are getting extreely emotional, crying and hugging. They don't even hear the door open. "Excuse me. Am I interrupting ?" a confused male voice asked. Chapter 22 Both Lois and Brenda look up in surprise. Ned is standing in the doorway looking at them completely lost. Ned sets his luggage down and walks over to his wife. "Uh Ned, Bren and I were trying to get some work done and you know us. Chat, chat , chat. We took one look at our kids and started bawling. Right Bren ?" "More or less. " Ned looks down at his daughter and godson "It is a wonderful sight. How are they ?" Lois and Brenda start crying and hugging again. Ned rolls his eyes and starts playng with the kids "They're getting tired. Why don't I put them down for a nap upstairs. You two can finish your work. I've got to go to the main house and see Grandfather." "I'll do it.You just flew in from Jakarta.Aren't you jet-lagged ?" "I would be if I had time to spare. Grandfather is bellowing about some deal i've got to take care of and i've got another one that needs to be closed soon. I've got to get to the ELQ offices. Do you need anything Lois ?" "Just my husband." "I'll be back soon. I promise" They start kissing, totally ignoring Brenda who finally clears her throat after a few minutes. "Uh guys. Do you want me to come back later ?" Ned glances at her. "Actually-" Lois hits him playfully. "No, stay Bren, Ned was just leaving." "Actually I was." "Later" Ned left and Brenda and Lois went back to their work after putting the kids down for their afternoon nap. Brenda had watched their interaction with amusement. She was happy for them. She was truly glad that they were happy and together. Everyone around her was happy and in love. Mac and Felicia. Lois and Ned. Luke and Laura. Edward and Lila. Even Monica and Alan patched things up. She was all alone without the man she loved. She couldn't admit it to anyone else but she still loved Sonny. No matter how much she tried to stop. at least she had Stone, her wonderful healthy son, their son. Chapter 23 Ned finishes up at ELQ hours later and walks over to the Port Charles Hotel. On the way he stops at Luke's to see Jason about an ELQ board meeting. Despite his best efforts Jason still had his ELQ stock. Luke, Jason and Sonny were all in the back room planning. "Did you hear that ?" Jason asked Luke "Are we expecting anyone boys ?" Luke asked "No " "I'll get rid if them." Luke walks outside. Once he sees who it is he panics but keeps his cool. He decides to get rid of him before he sees anything too soon. "We're closed Ashton." "Is Jason here ?" Ned asked ignoring his comment "Ashton. I'm surprised. You coming from a fancy boarding school and all I'd assume you'd have better manners than that." "You assumed wrong. I did school with Damian after all. I need to speak with Jason. Is he here?" "He's busy. Come back later." Ned senses something is up and decides to check things out. He starts to walk into the back room. "Hold up Ashton. "Luke is trying to stall, hoping Jason will come out and see why Luke hasn't come back yet. "What is it Spencer ?" Ned knew he was stalling but he was playing along. "You hardly come in anymore. I haven't seen nor heard a peep from the Quartermaine camp in awhile. How is Edward ?" "Still his old grumbling self. And you?" "Oh the usual. How's the leather cooling ? " Luke smirked "My singing carrer is on hold for the moment. I've been far too busy. My wife and I both have." "That's too bad. I like her. How's Brenda and company ?" "She's fine. So is Stone. He's happy considering his father abandoned him but in this case its a good thing. Sonny is bad news. Brenda is lucky to be rid of him. So is this town." Luke was starting to get annoyed. "Watch your mouth in my club Ashton. Sonny's been out of touch. He doesn't have a clue about his kid. If it is his kid." "Unfortunately for Stone it's true. Good thing Brenda didn't fill in the birth certificate with Sonny's name on it. That little boy would be a target." "Sonny's long gone. Why would you be asking ? You on a fishing expedition or something ?" "No. I've got better things to do. Why ? have you heard from him ?" They both know the other is lying but they don't let on. "Jason's busy. Come back later." Luke starts to leave but Ned stops him "Busy with what ? Another less than legal business dealing ?" "You would know. You and Edward own the corner on them." "As fascinating as this conversation is, I came here to speak with Jason so that's what I intend to do. Excuse me." "Not so fast Ashton." Chapter 24 Inside the back room "What is taking Luke so long ?" "I don't know. You want me to check it out ?" Yeah but hurry Jason." Jason is halfway out the door when he hears voices. "Who is it Jason ?" "It's Ned." "Ned Ashton ? Why is he here ?" "He called me earlier. Something about my stock." "Go get rid of him." "I'll try." Too late. Ned finally forces his way into the back. Ned is needless to say shocked to see Sonny and not at all surprised to see Jason too. "Corinthos. When did you slither back into town ?" Luke is still trying to get rid of Ned "Ashton. This is my private office. No Quartermaines allowed." "Jason's here." "I'm not a Quartermaine." "For once i'm my life I'm glad you're not." Ned turns his gaze over to Sonny who is sitting behind the desk relaxing. "Corinthos. I'm glad to see you enjoying yourself." "Are you ? I'd just as easily assume you had my grave picked out and were getting ready to dance on it." "For Brenda's sake I would be." Ned pauses "Luke, it's okay. Go back outside. I'll take care of this." "Like you took care of Brenda ?" "If you have a problem with me then leave her out of this." My problem with you is Brenda and what you did to her. I guess congradulations are in order Sonny. I thought you'd be off celebrating on a beach somewhere with your next conquest." "Celebrating what ?" "Successfully breaking Brenda's heart in a million ieces and getting away with it. That was a nice disappearing act you pulled. No one could find you. Not even whoever was after you." "Were you looking for me ? If I had known you missed me -" "Shut up Sonny. I could care less if you disappeared off the face of this planet but Brenda did. Leaving was one mistake. You just made another one. You should've stayed gone. " "Is that supposed to be a threat ?" "No. It's a fact. With the exception of these two fine gentlemen here no one wants you here." Jason finally interrupts them "Why don't you leave Ned." "I came to see you" "You did. Now leave. If you have something to say then say it and go. Leave Sonny out of it." "Sonny Cortinthos made it my business when he left my friend Brenda alone and broken without so much as a good-by like she was nothing. " "You know Ned-" "Sonny. It's okay. Look Ned Now is not a good time. " "I can see that. When would be a good time ? Right after Sonny leaves ? And when would that be Corinthos ?" Sonny glances at him nonchalantly "I haven't decided yet. My travel plans are up in the air. Possibly indefinitely." "I hear the Bahamas are nice this time of year. I'll even lend you the ELQ jet." "That's real generous of you Ned but i'll have to decline. I might have engine trouble and then where would that leave me." "You read my mind. Jason, tonight 6:30. There's an ELQ board meeting. We have to discuss something." "I can't make it. I have plans." "I can see that. Sonny I'm not through with our discussion. " "I am. If you have something to say then you can save it. I don't want to hear it. Jason it's okay. I'll handle this." Sonny nods to his best friend who goes back outside to wait with Luke. "I've sen how you operate Corinthos and it sucks. Even I didn't think you'd stoop so low as to-" "Enough. I'm not going to stand here and defend myself to the likes of you. " "Why ? because you can't explain what you did ? That's what it comes down to doesn't it ? You came back here lookinfg for forgiveness from Brenda. You can forget about it. Brenda hates you. She wants nothing to do with you." "Since when do you make decisions for her ?" "If she doesn't i'll make sure she stays away from you. So will Lois, my wife." "You two back together ? How'd you manage that one ?" "We love each other and our daughter. We worked things out like two adults and we remarried. We respect each other and we trust each other. We have an honest relationship, something you'd know nothing about and that's the truth." "You wouldn't know truth if it bit you-" "I may not be a saint but I look like one next to you. Brenda didn't deserve what you did to her. Even you know that. Deep down. I honestly believed you cared about Brenda because of Lois. Now I'm not so sure. Why did you come back ?" "I have some matters to setle." "Whatever it is you settle them and then leave. Stay away from Brenda. She doesn't need you waltzing back into town and rubbing her face in the mess you left. I meant what I said Sonny. Stay away from Brenda. You'll be lucky if she just slams the door in your face." Chapter 25 After Ned leaves Jason walks back into the office and sits in front of Sonny. "What do you want me to do ?" "About Ned ? Nothing. I'll take care of it. " "You're not worried ?" "No, the only thing he''ll do is run and tell Lois that i'm back. We need to take care of my territory. You're running things now and that's how its going to stay but there's something I need you to take care of..." Jason and Sonny continue to talk about business. At the Gatehouse... Ned walks through the door . Lois is on the couch alone "Hey honey. You're back early-" Ned glances around "What's wrong ?" "Is Brenda here ?" "No she just left. She went for a drive. She had to do something and told me to take care of Stone. He's upstairs. What happened ?" "He's back. " "Who ?" "Sonny " "Wha ? When ? How ?" "He was at Luke's . I went there to talk to Jason. He was there." "Is he okay ?" Ned looks at his wife exasparated. "He left Brenda at the altar and you're worried about Sonny ? Brenda doesn't know. If she runs into him-" "I didn't mean it like that. Sonny's an old friend. Look Brenda went out. Port Charles isn't that small of a town. What are the chances that they's run into each other..." The Docks It was late, she needed some time to think so she went to their place. It was dark on the darks with only light coming from the lampost and not a very safe place to be but she had to be there, near by at least,near him. C'mon Bren get over it and move on, she told herself, he probably has. Easier said than done. She knew she still loved him with all her heart and soul just like he still loved her. Or so she hoped. That's what made it so hard. The not knowing. She was about to turn around and go home when she stopped dead in her tracks. The man whose arms she called home was there. The man she planned her life and world aroundthe second she saw him. The man she had fought so hard to resist. The man she loved with all her heart. She didn't even have to turn around and look. After all this time, they were still so connected. That had to mean something. Even to him. She felt his presence just like he felt hers. She felt his body come closer and she heard his footsteps. Brenda felt her heart jump into her throat, her breathe stopped and she couldn't move. Silently she cursed herself for still feeling this way and letting him get to her this way again, after everything that had happened. She couldn't speak so she let him talk first. "Brenda..." She felt her whole body tingle like it always did when he said her name. No one else said it like him "...I've waited for this day for awhile."Continued
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