Love Conquers All
Chapter ~ 4 ~
Gillian got out of her car and walked up to S.O.S. She had already checked Hayley & Mateo's condo only to be told that Hayley was here doing inventory. As she drove here, the rest of the shops and restaurants were dead to the world. Why Hayley choose to get up so very early on a Saturday morning was a mystery to her, but since Gillian was in need of a good talk, she didn't question it. As she walked through the doors Hayley stopped stacking glasses and looked up.
"Hey, Gillian, " she said. "What are you doing up at this hour? It's barely 6:00 am."
Gillian smiled. It seemed everyone in PV knew she had a propensity for sleeping in. Still smiling she said, "I'm leaving town."
Hayley stared at her and put down the glass she was holding.
"For good?"
"No, no. Nothing like that. I'm going on vacation."
Hayley relaxed and commenced stacking glasses.
"All by yourself?" she asked.
"No", Gillian began timidly, dreading what she was about to say and the response she knew she'd get. "Jake is coming with me."
Hayley froze. When she finally replied, though she tried her hardest, the disgust was still apparant in her voice.
"You're going on vacation with Jake?"
"Yes," Gillian replied, not missing the message Hayley's tone of voice was sending. Her feelings on the matter where obvious, but even still, she knew Hayley would be a good sourse of advise. "We're coming back Monday afternoon. Just a weekend thing. We're going to this beautiful resort about 20 minutes outside of Virginia Beach. Here," she said, reaching into her bag, " I have a pamphlet."
She handed the paper to Hayley who opened it and spread it out on the bar. The building themselves looked quite stately and old fashion.
"Looks like something out of 'Gone With The Wind'," she said sarcastically.
"What?" Gillian asked, confused.
"Never mind."
Hayley's eyes scanned the rest of the brochure. Four swimming pools, Three hot tubs, Three saunas, it said. Complete with a private restarant, bar, and our own stretch of private beach 5 miles long.
"Jake must have paid an arm and a leg for all of this," Hayley said. Wonder why? she added silentely. She looked back down and saw the picture of a sample room. The decor was clearly Victorian, and very romantic. Each room has a private balcony, most overlooking the beach, she read. She looked back at the picture, taking note of the King Size bed.
"Will you and Jake be sharing a room?" she asked.
Gillian looked down and quietly said, "Yes."
"Oh," Hayley said looking over at her and wondering if she should continue. "This is really none of my business, but we're good friends - I consider you one of my best friends. So, I think we should be able to tell each other things."
"Of course," Gillian said, looking back up at Hayley.
"Okay.......Is this the first time the two of you......have shared a room?"
"Yeah," she replied, looking back down. "I always....I never wanted.....But, but, this is supposed to be a really romantic thing for us, you know." Her hand swept over the brochure. "What better place to finally consummate a relationship? To, to bask in the love you feel for one another, and prove it to each other in the most beautiful and pleasurable way."
Hayley gazed at her questioningly and immediately saw through the disguise.
"So, you're in love with Jake?"
Gillian didn't answer.
Sighing, Hayley said, "Is this what you really want? If it is, then why have you waited so long? Why aren't you with Jake right now, getting ready for the time of your life? Instead, you're here with me, trying so hard to convince me that this is the right thing to do. Are you sure you're not just trying to convince yourself?"
Hayley paused to let this sink in. Gillian looked up and the sadness was evident in her eyes. Hayley's heart ached for her. It was so hard to see a friend suffer like Gillian was - and Ryan for that matter. She decided to change the direction of the conversation, hoping to gain more leeway.
"What about Ryan?" she asked, quietly.
"We're divorced now. We have been for months. Nothing's changed," she said, her eyes moving to the place where they'd shared the first dance on opening night. "Nothing is going to change, Hayley."
"Gillian......" she began, not knowing what to say.
Very sadly and defeatedly Gillian continued, "He doesn't love me any more. There's nothing I can do about it." With a lame attempt at humor she added, "Believe me, I know."
"Gillian, I know what it's like to be where Ryan's at right now. You're not sure of anything, least of all yourself. You remember what your family life has been like - that you know - and you're bound to end up just like them. It's a genetic thing, you see, there's nothing you can do about it. And since you can't stop it, the decent thing to do, the only thing to do, is remove yourself from the picture, detach yourself from all people - it's for their own good; they'll thank you in the end. Well, now I know and you know that 's not true. One day Ryan will know, too, but it takes time. He goes to ACOA meetings with me every Thursday. I can tell that he's beginning to see things the way they really are. He does love you, Gillian, and hopefully someday soon he'll trust that enough to do something about it."
The tears that had filled Gillian's eyes were now falling down her cheeks.
"You can't guarantee that, any of it. And, I can't keep living like this. I can't spend the rest of my life holding on to false hopes. I just can't......Jake loves me, and he's ready to do something about it."
"What you're doing is a dangerous thing, Gillian," Hayley said, carefully. "You can't make yourself love Jake if you don't. And, no matter how hard you try, he will never replace Ryan. Not in your life, or in your heart. That place can only be filled by him. You may not believe that now, but you will. This is only going to lead to more hurt - for all of you."
"Well, I've got to do something," Gillian said and looked down at her watch. Wiping the tears from her eyes she declared, "I have to go. Jake's waiting for me."
"All right," Hayley said, softly.
Gillian picked up her bag and started to go.
"Gillian."
She stopped and turned around.
"You know I'm behind you 100%, no matter what happens, okay?"
"Thank you, Hayley," she said, tears welling up again in her eyes. She turned to leave and the door softly shut behind her.
Hayley looked down at the pamphlet Gillian had left behind and shook her head. She really hoped Gillian was doing the right thing - for everyone concerned. But, she had an ominous feeling about all this. Suddenly, the back door slammed opened. Startled, Hayley turned around to find a very agitated Ryan standing in front of her.
Chapter ~ 5 ~
"Ryan, what's the matter?" Hayley asked.
"Have you seen Gillian?" he asked impatiently, ignoring her question.
"Um, yeah, she was here a minute ago. You guys must've just missed each other. Why? What's up?"
"I just really need to talk to her - right away."
"Well, Ryan, that's going to be a little difficult. She's leaving town right away, going on vacation for the weekend."
"Oh," he said, pondering that for a moment. "I suppose I'll have to wait 'till she gets back."
"Would you like to tell me what this is all about?" Hayley asked.
"I've just been thinking a lot lately, Hayley, about life and the mistakes I've made."
"And that's where Gillian fits in," she finished for him.
"Last night I had a dream. Gillian was in the hospital, and I was so scared for her, until I realized she was having a baby. I always hoped that somewhere down the line Gillian and I would -"
"Well, of course you'd hoped for children someday," Hayley interrupted. "Most couples do. And, dreams have a way of mirroring what, deep inside, we really wished would happen."
"It wasn't my baby she was having. It was Jake's. It was the most awful feeling in my life, and it was so final. I tried to yell and say there was a mistake, but no one could hear me. The child wasn't mine - and Gillian was lost to me forever. I woke up so relieved that it was a dream......but maybe it's not."
"Ryan...." Hayley began.
"Seriously, Hayley. I mean, what's to stop it from happening? Certainly not me. Whenever I see them together I just smile and tell Gillian how happy I am for her. Well, it's a lie!" Ryan said, shoving the nearby table's contents to the floor.
Hayley had never seen Ryan quite so upset and wasn't sure how to handle the situation. "Ryan, I - "
"My whole life's a lie. I've gone around so self-righteously, convinced of the fact that it was okay to hurt everyone because I was doing them a favor. When really I was just too much of a coward to admit I was scared. Scared of screwing up. Scared of losing Gillian. Scared of becoming just like my father. All I wanted to do protect Gillian; make sure I didn't hurt her. And, that's all I have done! But, I want to make up for it. Hayley, I would walk through fire for Gillian, and I need her to know that. I think we still have a chance to be together, to make things right - if she'd only agree to it." Ryan sighed and looked over at Hayley. "You know, I don't think I can wait 'till Gillian gets back. Did she leave a number where's she's going to be staying? I'd really like to call her if I could."
"Oh, Ryan," Hayley said with compassion, "I don't really think that's a very good idea."
"Why?" Ryan asked, knowing immediately that something was wrong.
"Oh God, Ryan......I, I don't know how to tell you this......"
"What, Hayley? What?" Ryan asked, his anxiety building.
"Ryan, Gillian didn't go by herself. Jake's with her."
Chapter ~ 6 ~
"Oh my God," Ryan said quietly, sinking down onto the bar stool. "I, I didn't realize they were that involved."
"Yeah, neither did I," Hayley said. "Well, really I don't think they are."
Ryan looked at her then with something resembling hope in his eyes.
"Gillian told me that they've never actually consummated their relationship. She never wanted to, Ryan. All she could think of was you. I doubt she even wants to go on this trip, not really. It's all Jake's idea. Apparently, he senses that she's been holding back and he thinks this trip will fix everything. But, Gillian's still in love with you, Ryan."
"She told you that?"
"She's told me thousands of times and, even if she hadn't, it's so obvious in everything she does and says. She's only going with Jake because she's given up on you. She thinks you don't love her anymore, that you never will agian. I think she even wonders if you ever really did. She has no hope left for the two of you now. So, she has no reason to hold out anymore. This weekend is supposed to be their big romantic trip. I mean, well, after tonight your nightmare may not be so far fetched."
"Oh, God.....She is my wife."
"Well, he definetely plans on sleeping with her. Gillian told me he booked one suite. I think that's the purpose of this entire trip. You know, the further she is away from you......"
"I've got to find her," he interrupted.
"Ryan, I hate to sound apathetic but, Gillian's had lots of men before you....."
"But none after me. I know you probably think that's male-chauvinistic, but I can't help it. How would you feel if Mateo had slept with Raquel again - even if it was only one night? The thought of anyone else's hands on Gillian.....kills me. I can not let it happen."
"Okay. All right. Gillian said they're staying at a resort near Virginia Beach. Do you know the area?"
"Yeah, I've been there a couple of times."
Hayley's face lit up and she spun around.
"Here," she said, grabbing the brochure that still sat on the bar behind her. "Gillian left this. It's a pamphlet for the resort they're staying at."
She turned the paper so Ryan could see it.
"Paradise Beach Resort," he read.
"Yeah," Hayley said. "And, I'll be....Let me see.....Yes, right here," she said, showing Ryan. "Here's a map with directions."
"Perfect," he said, grabbing the brochure and running towards the door.
"Ryan, good luck!" she called off after him, watching as he left in a whirlwind.
Hayley stood at the bar, smiling to herself. "Well, Gillian, you said it was the perfect place to fall in love all over again. You have no idea how right you are!"
Chapter ~ 7 ~
Ryan pulled his car into the parking lot of the Paradise Beach Resort. He had just been to the lobby to check in and had spent a considerable chunk of his savings to get a suite near Gillian's. He took out his key, grabbed his luggage, and was walking towards his suite when he saw them.
Gillian was holding Jake's free hand and laughing as he tried to lug one of her overstuffed suitcases up the stairs. Ryan couldn't help but laugh when he remembered all of his Princess' belongings that always cluttered her room at Wildwind. The laugh turned into a rush of love when he remembered how she had given up every last item of her beloved wardrobe and dressed as a dirty gardener while with him on the run from the police. God, he loved her.