Homework Inquiry

"Vernon, where's your homework?" Miss Martin said sternly to the little
boy while holding out her hand.

"My dog ate it," was his solemn response.

"Vernon, I've been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really expect me
to believe that?"

"It's true, Miss Martin, I swear," insisted the boy. "I had to force him,
but he ate it!"

The Twins

Once upon a time a married couple bore twin sons. However, they could not
afford to keep them, so they put them up for adoption.

One of the boys went to a Spanish family and was named Juan. The other
son
went to an Egyptian family and was named Amal.

Some years later, Juan became curious about his real parents.

After researching and finally locating them, he sent them a nice letter
and a picture of himself.

Upon receiving the picture, the birth mother said "I'm so glad that he's
happy. And what a wonderful picture. I wish we had a picture of Amal. I
wonder what he looks like."

Her husband turned to her and said, "I wouldn't worry about it. When
you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

The Funeral

A priest, a rabbi, a doctor and a lawyer are gathered at a mutual
friend's
graveside to mourn his passing.

The priest says to the others, "I think our good friend would have liked
to take something with him to his next life." He pulls a $100 bill from
his wallet and drops it on the casket.

The rabbi agrees, "That's a fine idea," and drops his own $100 bill on
the casket.

The doctor, not to be outdone, does the same.

The lawyer murmurs, "What a wonderful thought," as he gazes down at their
friend's casket. Whipping out his pen, he quickly writes a check for
$400, drops it into the grave and takes the three $100 bills as change.