The Great Astrological Light Bulb Joke

 
 How many members of your sign does it take to change
  a light bulb?

 ARIES:
 Just one. You want to make something of it?

 TAURUS:
 One, but just try to convince them that the  burned-out
 bulb is useless and should be thrown  away.

 GEMINI:
 Two, but the job never gets done-they just keep discussing
 who is supposed to do it and how it's supposed to be done!

 CANCER:
 Just one. But it takes a therapist three years to help
 them through the grieving process.

 LEO:
 Leos don't change light bulbs, although sometimes their
 agent will get aVirgo in to do the job for them while they're
  out.

 VIRGO:
 Approximately 1.000000 with an error of +/- 1 millionth.

 LIBRA:
 Er, two. Or maybe one. No, on second thought, make that two.
  Is that OK with you?

 SCORPIO:
 That information is strictly secret and shared only with the
 Enlightened Ones in the Star Chamber of the Ancient Hierarchical
  Order.

 SAGITTARIUS:
 The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives
 ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out
 light bulb?

 CAPRICORN:
 I don't waste my time with these childish jokes.

 AQUARIUS:
 Well, you have to remember that everything is energy, so....

 PISCES:
 Light bulb? What light bulb?