MICROSOFT SHOULD MAKE CARS, GM SHOULD MAKE SOFTWARE.

 
  
 At a recent computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared
 the computer industry with the auto industry and stated:

 "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry
 has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got
 1000 miles to the gallon."

 In response to Bill's comments/General Motors issued a press
 release stating the following: "If GM had developed technology
 like Microsoft, we would be driving cars with the following
 characteristics:

 1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a
    day.

 2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would
    have to buy a new car.

 3. Occasionally, your car would die on the freeway for no
    reason, and you would accept this, restart, and drive on.

 4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn
    would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart;
    in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

 5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you
    bought 'Car95' or 'CarNT.'  Then you would have to buy
    more seats.

 6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun,
    was more reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy
    to drive, but would only run on five percent of the roads.

 7. The oil, water, temperature and alternator warning lights
    would be replaced by a single 'general car fault' warning
    light.

 8. New seats would force everyone to have the same butt
    size.

 9. The airbag system would say 'Are you sure?'  before going
    off.

 10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would
     lock you out and refuse to let you in until you
     simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and
     grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

 11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a
     deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary),
     even though they neither need them nor want them.  Attempting
     to delete this option would immediately cause the car's
     performance to diminish by 50 per cent or more.

 12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would
     have to learn how to drive all over again because none of
     the controls would operate in the same manner as the old
     car.

 13. You'd press the 'Start' button to shut off the engine.