Deadlands
Real Men, Roleplayers, Munchkins, and Loonies

This is a list compiled from a thread on the Deadlands ListServe.

Favorite Archetype:
Real Man: Gunslinger
Real Roleplayer: Muckraker
Real Loony: Phobia Ridden French Pastry Chef
Real Munchkin: Harrowed Texas Ranger Martial Artist Huckster with 5 Mad Scientist Friends In High Places
-- MW


Favorite Edges:
Real Man: Grit, Sand
Real RolePlayer: Veteran of the Weird West, Animal Companion(Dog)
Real Loony: Veteran Companion(flea circus), no tickle spots
Real Munchkin: All of them
-- MW


Favorite Hindrances:
Real Man: Stubborn, Mean as a rattler
Real RolePlayer: Ferner, High Falutin
Real Loony: phobia of air, bed wetter
Real Munchkin: wouldn't take hindrances because their characters are perfect or would take all of them but never role-play them.
-- MW


Favourite Gun:
Real Man: Peacemaker, Winchester Rifle
Real RolePlayer: Derringer, Rifle cane
Real Loony: Flamethrower full of Jelly (Jello), Rocksalt gun
Real Munchkin: Steam Gatling with AP ammo(rel 20), man portable artillery
-- TB


Favourite Hand to Hand weapon:
Real Man: Tomahawks, Bowie Knives
Real RolePlayer: Father's Cavalry Sabre (-- Allan Seyberth)
Real Loony: malfunctioning flapjack machine, dynamite, nerf bats
Real Munchkin: Burning Ghostrock sword and shield
-- TB


Favourite means of conveyence:
Real Man: Trusted Steed
Real RolePlayer: Stage Coach
Real Loony: Rocket Boots with parachute chaps
Real Munchkin: Steam Wagon with 2ft thick plate armour and a turret mounted artillery piece that traverses 360 degrees and moves back so that the airship baloon can inflate.
-- TB


Favourite Drink:
Real Man: Whiskey, Tequilla
Real RolePlayer: Milk, Sasparilla (-- Selby Thorpe)
Real Loony: Banana Daqarii (sp?)
Real Munchkin: Strength-Deftness-Quickness-Nimbleness-Vigor-increasin'-Elixer
-- TB


Favourite Poker Hand:
Real Man: Dead man's Hand
Real RolePlayer: Full House, Queens and Aces
Real Loony: Three Jokers or five of a kind (no jokers)
Real Munchkin: A royal flush and five aces (red jokers only)
-- TB


Favourite Huckster spell:
Real Man: Soul Blast
Real RolePlayer: Shadow walk
Real Loony: Phantom Fingers
Real Munchkin: Mega Death Reality Warp
-- TB


Favourite thing about Ghost Dancers:
Real Man: can't have cowboys and Indians without Indians...
Real RolePlayer: Detailed background to help them portray Native Americans better
Real Loony: Character names like 'runs with scissors'
Real Munchkin: Coloured grit means more chance of coming back from the dead
-- TB


Favourite thing about F&B:
Real Man: One word - Quests
Real RolePlayer: A wide variety of religious types to portray
Real Loony: Huckster Rabbis
Real Munchkin: Its got some information about god that can be used as a starting point for determining his stats
-- TB


Favourite Adventure Module:
Real Man: Night Train
Real RolePlayer: Independance day
Real Loony: A well shuffled Doomtown booster
Real Munchkin: None, They're all too easy...
-- TB


Favorite Place To Hang Out:
Real Man: The Maze or The Badlands
Real role-player: Dodge City
Real Loony: Honolulu
Real Munchkin: Dr. Hellstrom's warehouse
-- MW


Favorite Quote:
Real Man: Draw, Pardner
Real Role-player: You might shoot me, You might even kill me, but you won't walk away from it alive...Unless you turn around now and do it real slow.
Real Loony: Pull My Finger
Real Munchkin: I make a called shot left eye with my gattling pistol loaded with armor piercing ghost rock bullets....haha I rolled a natural 75 to hit.
-- MW


Favorite Side-Kick:
Real Man: Indian Brave or Chinese Martial Artist
Real Role-player: Special Dog or a Muckraker
Real Loony: Rodeo Clown or Circus Clown
Real Munchkin: US Army
-- MW


Favourite thing about Deadlands in General:
Real men: like the idea of using poker cards in combat, and calling the GM the Marshal
Real Roleplayers: Think the idea of a wierd western is great
Loonines: Like any game where you can play a mad scientist
Munchkins: love the opportunity to play something where death doesn't kill them. (-- MW)
-- RM


Favourite Deadlands Artwork:
Real Man: like Stone on the cover
Real RolePlayer: like the archtype pictures
Real Loony: like the hat gun, like the ISBN lines
Real Munchkin: like the girl in the vest
-- TB


Favourite General:
Real Man: Custer
Real RolePlayer: Jackson
Real Loony: Motors
Real Munchkin: Swartzkopf
-- TB

one for the list serve
Favourite [OT] subject:
Real Man: Godzilla
Real RolePlayer: Vampire LARPers
Real Loony: Harrowed Chipmunks
Real Munchkin: OT subjects aren't funny and are against the rules of the list...
-- TB


Prefered pistol(s):
Real men: use twin double action peacemakers, and silver bullets
Real Roleplayers: use double action peacemakers, and ned buntline specials
loonies: use twin double action pop guns, and silver corks
Munchkins: think pistols are wussy
-- RM


Favorite rifle(s):
Real men: use 50. sharps (buffalo guns)
Real Roleplayers: use scatterguns or double barrel shotguns
Loonies: use blowguns full of frozen peas
Munchkins: use gatling guns
-- RM


favorite combat skill
Real Men: like shootin': rifle
Real Roleplayers: like shootin': pistol/shotgun
Loonies: love throwin': boomerang (and let it come back and hit them in the head)
Munchkins: use shootin': shotgun and forget to reload
-- RM


Most hated Hinderances
Real Men: hate scrawny ,and yeller
Real Roleplayers: can't stand oath or obligation
Loonies: hate grim servant O' death
Munchkins: wet them selves by thinking about hinderances
-- RM


thoughts about the Horse Eater adventure
Real Men: let the Real Roleplayers figure it out
Real Roleplayers: thought the cultists plan to damage the Iron Dragon treaty was brilliant
Loonies: thought it was nice of Never Smiles to leave alcohol in the wagon for them
Munchkins: wondered why bullets wouldn't kill the beast
-- RM


when facing the horse eater
Real men: shoot like mad
Real Roleplayers: set up a nasty trap and use the Munchkin (or his horse) as bait
Loonies:[idea 1: set up a puppet show showing the importence of dental hygine ] [idea 2: tell it bad jokes untill its head explodes]
Munchkins: Beg Forgiveness!!!! (or shoot guided ghostrock missiles at it... -- TB)
-- RM


Favorite Threat:
Real Men: say "I'm gonna kill you five times before you hit the ground!"
Real Roleplayers: say "I'm going to wipe that smile off your face"
Loonies: say "with what, a moist towlet?" (or "Nobody move, or the nigger gets it!" -- Mel Brooks)
Munchkins: feel intimidated (or say "If I push this little red button, they'll be so little left of your town it'll be called _dead_wo... oh wait, it already is isn't it..." -- TB)
-- RM


Favorite Diversion:
Real Men: just shoot
Real Roleplayers: say "your fly is open and your hostess twinky is hanging out"
Loonies: say "hey, isn't that the chick from baywach?" or "hey look it's Captian Picard"
Munchkins: run away screaming (or get their airships to dive bomb the other end of town while they hide in the alley in their battlemechs -- TB) (use Dynamite -- MW)
-- RM


Favorite Relic:
Real Men: like Sacred tomahawk of the sun
Real Roleplayers: like Hoyle's cards
Loonies: like Popeye's spinach
Munchkins: like Unholy symbol
-- RM


Favorite Deadlands reading material
Real Men: read the Combat section
Real Roleplayers: read the Tombstone Epitaph
Loonies: read MAD magazine(the lighter side of deadlands)
Munchkins: read the stuff behind the GM's screen
-- RM


Favorite thing to do in a salloon
Real Men: drink cheap whisky untill they go three sheets to the wind/start fights
Real Roleplayers: talk to everyone and wach how much they drink/gamble
Loonies: go three sheets to the wind, annoy the local bully(s) and end up hanging from a tree by their underpants
Munchkins: (Cheat at poker 'cause the rules say they can -- TB) (Try to get themselves killed in a barfight, so they can come back Harrowed(if they're not already). -- MW)
-- RM


Favorite shaman Ritual
Real Men: like Scar
Real Roleplayers: like Tattoo
Loonies: like Maim
Munchkins: can't bring them selves to do a ritual
-- RM


Favorite shaman Favor
Real Men: use Strength of the bear
Real Roleplayers: use Shape shift
Loonies: use Urge of the lemming
Munchkins: use Call nature spirit
-- RM


Favorite miracle
Real Men: use Smite
Real Roleplayers: use Lay on hands
Loonies: use Consencrate toilet paper
Munchkins: use Assume Godhood
-- RM


Favorite thing about Doomtown
Real Men: Just like the cool art work
Real Roleplayers: love the fact that yet another one of thier Favorite roll playing games can now fit in your pocket
Loonies: can't find any cards with the word wedgie involved (they like the flavour text -- TB)
Munchkins: say bad things about it, because they can't find a all powerfull win the game card.
-- RM


Favorite thing about the Great Rail Wars
Real Men: think the minatures consept make combat seem better
Real Roleplayers: think the minatures consept makes the game seen more real
Loonies: swich all the minatures with ones from the Morons from planet X minature game
Munchkis: borow minatures from Shadowrun or Cyperpunk 2020
-- RM


Favorite Abomination
Real Men: like Wendigo
Real Roleplayers: like Hangin' judges
Loonies: like Prarie Ticks "oh look it's trying to climb in my mouth" (like giving people the butcher's scalpel -- TB)
Munchkins: wet them selves when they see one (but they like Reckoners for the Coup -- TB)
-- RM


Most hated Abomination
Real Men: Hate Los Diablos
Real Roleplayers: Hate Tummy Twisters
Looines: Hate Humans with no sense of humor
Munchkins: Hate whatever just devoured him (Hate Great Cthulhu -- TB, I wrote this before the crossover was announced but I guess it still makes sense)
-- RM

*I have no idea who wrote the following, if that someone could mail me
*I'll attach their name to them...
*They are perhaps a little long but I love the fudge one and the spirit of the pony express...

Favorite Abominations
Real Man: Los Diablos.
Real Role-Player: Harrowed Saloon Gal.
Real Loony: The Spirit of the Pony Express What Goes Around Delivering Packages Wicked Fast Trying to Earn $500k to Pay Back The Pony Express's Debts.
Real Munchkin: A Horde of Greater Manitous each enchanted with the shamanic favors of Turtle Shell and Strength of the Bear, accompanied by a Blessed of the evil god, SatanMan, who uses his miracles to cancel out the magic of the posse.


Favorite Way to Stick a Posse Together
Real Man: "You meet in a saloon."
Real Role-Player: "Joe, your character, Jeffe Dela Muerte is in his adobe house in Mexico." "No, we're starting at the beggining." "No, I won't just say you get there, we have to build background. There's a knock on the door." "Well?" "Hey, I don't know, maybe you were avoiding answering the door..."
Real Loony: "You're all sleeping in your respective rooms when there's a huge flash of light and you all wake up in a cold, dark bunker in Fort 51. I mean... Dang. Okay, but your characters don't know where they are or that they were transported by a..."
Real Munchkin: "Buck, you just started a fight with Bloody Brusco Joe, Meanest Man in the West." "What? I don't care if you're a pacifist, you're in a fight. Stan, you're across the room, you should join in because Joe just pulled out the Steam Gatling he was hiding in that canvas beside his stool. Bill, you're walking down the street when you hear the sounds of combat _about_ to start. You should... Well, what do you do?"


Favorite NPC
Real Man: Clint Eastwood.
Real Role-Player: Runs With Feathers, cryptic but prophetic shaman who's the last of his tribe and has some strange stake in everything the PCs do.
Real Loony: Adolphus Rambini, master acrobat, shyster, and he mixes one mean martini al dente.
Real Munchkin: T2. That's right. He time-traveled back, y'see.


Favorite Fudge:
Real Man: "What's a fudge?"
Real Role-Player: "You failed your cognition check to spot the cliff-edge? And you failed your area knowledge roll to remember that there was a canyon there? And you failed the Smarts check to see if you could infer the existence of a cliff-edge from the lack of land in the distance? Roll a Quickness check to see if you're quick enough to stop. You failed? Roll a Nimbleness check to keep your balance and avoid falling. Dang. Roll Strength to see if you can hold onto the edge. Hmm. Climbin'? No? Well, it'd be pretty detrimental to the story if your PC died here, so we'll just say he saw the cliff."
Real Loony: "Well, as things stand, you should be dead. But, I'll let you roll an eight-sided die and if you get a one, there's a large bird in the area. Then roll a twelve-sided die to see if it cares about saving your character. You'll need another one. Now, if you can get a 1 on d20, then the large falcon swoops down and picks you up just long enough to keep you from falling."
Real Munchkin: "He did 95 points to your right arm. No you can't _see_ the dice, that's what my screen is for."

thanks to the Major contributors:
MW -- Mikhael Weitzel
RM -- Ross Manning
TB -- Tim Betz



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