August 5th, 1999

August 5th...It has been a long long time since I wrote down my thoughts but I have been trying to sort everything out once and for all and I reached my final decision last night. I decided that I want Brian. Plain and simple lol. I know that he is with another girl right now but for some reason that doesn't matter to me. I care about him so much and that scared me for a while but not anymore. I am not going to run away from him again.
I have no clue how he feels about me...that is the only problem that I see right now. I have to get him to tell me something one way or another but how? HMmmMmM...this is not going to be easy lol but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. :O) I am on a mission of the heart hahaha cornball!!!!
I just feel like we could be really great together if we ever had the chance, ya know? There is something inside of me that just won't give up on him so I won't. God, I just wish that I had him here with me, right now. I just want to be close to him. ~sighs~ If it is meant to be it will be lol but I am a tad bit on the impatient side and the suspense is killing me. hehehe
Anyways, I am still working at the animal hospital and I still love it, most of the time, unless I am getting my limbs chewed off by a dog. What else? My grandfather is visiting from Florida for a month or so. He is sleeping in my room so lucky me gets to bunk with my brother. The little booger talks in his sleep lol and he drives me nutty. hahaha I am sick again lol and the doctor gave me like 3 different medicines yeah so when I take them I am spaced out. It is crazy. I was at work today and I literally walked around in circles all day. I had no idea what was going on but I wasn't feeling any pain hehehe. I am going to go and relax in a bubble bath for a while and try to come up with a plan to get Brian to talk lol.


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