Pizza Cats X:
Episode 2: Confectionary Catastrophy
Plot: A box of candies arrives, marked to the Pizza Cats... when AJ and Francine share the chocolates, they end up in an unconcious state. The only method Polly, Speedy, and Guido have of reviving the two lovers is to secure a flask of water from the Vanilla Falls, located on Yosh'ra Isle. Melanie, having been the one behind the chocolaty loss of conciousness, sends a robot sponge, to get all the water from Vanilla Falls and drain it into the sea. Will out heroes outrun the giant sponge? Will AJ and Fran ever wake up? Am I, the Narrator, wearing pants? Find out in Confectionary Catastrophy, on the next Pizza Cats X.
Scene 1:
Characters: Melanie, Two Shadowy Dudes
Setting: Table in Melanie's quarters.
Melanie: You four say this stuff will knock them unconcious?
Shadow #1: Yes.. it'll keep em unconcious forever, or at least until the Vanilla Water is found, but nobody's ever found Yosh'ra Isle, and it'll hopefully stay that way.
Melanie: I know where that is, dolt... I hung out there in the Umbra, all the time.
Shadow #2: You mean the Umbra has one too?
Melanie: Duh.. the Umbra is just the same planet, but another dimension, wrapped around this planet, in this dimension.
Shadow #1: You told us already, Melted.
Melanie: I was telling the audience, you idiot!
Shadow #2: ALRIGHT! I getcha! Geez.. no reason to be yelling at us. Just make sure you find a way to lose the Vanilla Water... we're done being associated with you.
Melanie: What's your charge?
Shadow #1: 13 dollars, Melanie.
Scene 2:
Characters: All Pizza Cats.
Setting: Emporium Lobby, closed early due to lack of business.
Polly: We're closed.
Stranger: I have a package for you guys. You gonna sign?
Polly: Alright.. I'll sign for it... (to herself: If they've been ordering underwear for me again, I'll kill em.)
Stranger: Thanks, lady.
Polly: Hmm.. wonder what this is...
Guido: I still say you snuck that pawn on when I was getting a Mt. Dew.
Speedy: Oh admit it, you just moved your knight too early, and you got pounded.
Guido: Well, I want a rematch later, alright?
Speedy: Oh fine, I'll just beat you again.
Guido: What do you have there?
Polly: I dunno... some wierdo just delivered it.
Speedy: It's addressed to us.. let's open it.
Guido: It says "The Pizza Cats," Speedy... AJ has to be here too for us to open it. We'd get in trouble otherwise.
ACiD: What's up?
Speedy: Cool, you're here, let's open this package up now.
Fran: What package?
Guido: Polly says it just came in now.
Polly: Yeah.. the delivery guy was kinda creepy.
ACiD: Well, open it up...
Speedy: Okay.. pass me that Exacto-Blade, Fish?
Polly: Chocolates? Why Chocolates?
Speedy: Somebody had a lot of candy to spare, I guess...
ACiD: Hand us a box of those...
Fran: Cool.... AJ, Let's try em!
ACiD: Okay..
Fran: Not too bad... a little sweet, but it is chocolate after all.
ACiD: She's right.. pretty tasty, actually.
Speedy: Cool... well, if you two are going to continue feeding eachother, please, don't do it here... it's really sacchiriny, and I want to watch my sugar intake.
Polly: Oh be quiet Speedy. It's romantic.
Guido: It is not, Polly. It's just really sappy.
ACiD: SHH! Shut up, guys! We'll go be romantic in Fran's room, alright?
Speedy: Alright.
Fran: Bring the chocolates?
ACiD: Of course, milady.
ACiD: What's goin on?
Fran: Woo... I can't stay on my feet... I'm gonna fal....
ACiD: They must have been spiked with sleepy juice or something... Gotta.. tell the... guys..
Polly: Speedy, we haven't even gone stargazing for a year now.. let's go do that now...
Speedy: Good idea, Polly... I'll bring some chocolates.
ACiD: Don't!
Speedy: What's wrong, Fish?
ACiD: Chocolate.... spiked.... Fran... unconcious.... Chocolate... make you sleep....
Polly: The chocolates were poisoned? FRAN! Oh my god.... this is serious bad, fellas.
Guido: Pizza Cats.. we're clo......
Unknown Voice: Your friends just ate the chocolates, right?
Guido: HOW'D YOU KNOW THAT?!?
Voice: I know how to cure them. There's an island south of Little Tokyo called Yosh'ra Isle. You need to go there, and get some water from the Vanilla Falls. Beware, Melanie is sending something to take all that water away. You must leave now...
Guido: But, who are you?
Voice: You don't need to know. *click*
Guido: Hello? HELLO?!
Speedy: Who was on the phone?
Guido: Help. They said Melanie sent the poisoned chocolates, and the cure is on an island south of Little Tokyo.. and we need to leave now.
Polly: But, who's gonna operate the computer?
Guido: Don't you know how to, Polly?
Polly: Only a little... maybe there's an automatic control switch?
Speedy: Look for it, Polly.. I'm gonna get some containers.
Guido: I'll pack some food.
Francine: Excuse me for interrupting, but apparently there's an emergency requiring the Cats to use me, the automatic launch system. We hate to disturb you, but there's big problems on an island south of here, and we have to extend out cannon. Thank you for being patient!
Speedy: At least she didn't mention candy puns.
Guido: It was pre-recorded, dope. She couldn't have anyway.
Cut-scene while the cats fly there:
Characters: Melanie, Arthur.
Setting: Inside quarters.
Melanie: Is the Air-Sponge ready, Arthur?
Arthur: Yes, it's all ready.. should we go?
Melanie: Sounds like fun.. let's go.
Arthur: Right this way, Cheese.
Polly: At least she can't make a calculation error.
Francine-ALS: Uhoh, I made a miscalculation in the launch.
Guido: Did you *REALLY* have to say it, Polly?
Polly: Well, I'm sorry... it just came to mind, and I thought I should say it.
Speedy: Oh well.... hey look, there's the tree we're gonna hit.
Guido: Oh.. hey.. it's a palm tree...
Polly: Yeah... pretty neat.
George of the Jungle: Watch out for that tree!
Speedy: Ouch... that's gonna leave a mark.
Polly: What are they?
Speedy: I don't know, Polly...
Green Yoshi: Oh, you two must be from Little Tokyo. I'm Yoshi Arturo, and these are my colleauges, Yoshi Ramden, Reznor, Carmichael, and Yoshi Lotus.
Guido: Lotus? Like AJ Lotus?
Yoshi Lotus: Yeah.. me and him are sorta brothers? Why do ya ask?
Speedy: Melanie Tedal poisoned him with Sleepy Juice, and we're here to get some water from Vanilla Falls.
Yoshi Ramden: Well, if it's to help AJ, we'll give ya a ride up there! Just hop on our backs.
Melanie: Are we almost there, Arthur?
Arthur: Almost... we've got about 15 minutes....
Melanie: Good.. I want them to remain asleep, so I can deal with Little Tokyo as I please.
Arthur: (to himself) I wish she would just desire to rule, so I wouldn't be so worried.
Melanie: What was that?
Arthur: Umm.. nothing.
Melanie: I thought so.
Ramden: Well, we're almost there... did you bring something to take the water home in?
Speedy: Yeah... we grabbed 13 Surge bottles.
Reznor: Rinsed out?
Polly: Yup...
Reznor: Okay....
Melanie: You're too late, Yoshii. We're here to keep the Pizza Cats from waking up.
Ramden: They aren't sleeping. They're right here...
Melanie: What? HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?!
Ramden: Well, we gave em a ride... Wait... where did they go?
Speedy: *big laugh* What, you expected us to beat up your robot without introducing ourselves first? That's ridiculous...
Guido: Ya know, for somebody related to the Big Cheese, you're really stupid. I'm Guido Anchovie.
Polly: I'm Polly Ester, and I tend to love my work a little *kiss* too much!
Speedy: I'm Speedy Cerviche, and we're here to stop you again, Melanie.
Cats: We're the Pizza Cats!
Melanie: Well, at least I know who I'm going to kill....
Speedy: Who says you're gonna kill us?
Melanie: CROWS! Go at these loonies. Teach em a lesson.
Polly: Cmon... that can't be all you have on this sponge!
Melanie: So you defeated my crows. So what? I'm still gonna get all the Vanilla Water.
Guido: NO! She's getting the water!
Polly: Not if *I* can help it!
Polly: The *FIRST* time AJ and Francine get romantic, and you have to spoil it with spiked chocolates. That tweaks me off more than Russo-Finnish co-productions about Jack Frost!
Melanie: THIS IS NOT HAPPENING! I WILL NOT BE DEFEATED!
Melanie: How could this happen? How could it?!?
Arthur: Cheese, calm down.. you're getting angry.
Melanie: OF COURSE I'M GETTING ANGRY!
Arthur: Well, at least she wasn't *REALLY* angry.
Polly: Well... let's get them awake.
Guido: Did you remember Yoshi Arturo's instructions?
Polly: Yup.. pour half a bottle into thier mouths, after you've applied the first half to thier chest.
ACiD: GEEZ! That crap is warm!
Speedy: Cool.. it works. Now, AJ wasn't a problem because he didn't have anything to worry about from an exposed chest. Francine, however, presents problem... she's a little touchy about being half nude in front of us...
ACiD: I'll do it... she didn't mind me being around while she was in her underwear.
Guido: Well... do the deed, Fish.
ACiD: As I said, she didn't mind being around while she was in her underwear, but I'm sure she'd mind terribly if I let you guys watch me cover her in liquid. Think ya could go away for a minute?
Polly: Yeah... this is something they need to be alone for... let's leave them alone.
Speedy: Okay... Cmon, Guido.. let's go play another game of chess. Bet I'll win again.
Guido: Not if I can help it!
ACiD: Well, Fran.... if you're gonna be pissed at me, at least know I was just saving you from a comatose state.
ACiD: Damn it, Narrator, you get out of here too!
Narrator: But *I* get to watch!
ACiD: Hey, just because you're the only one without a body doesn't mean you get to watch... go on, get out of here!
Narrator: But....
ACiD: GO AWAY!
Narrator: Alright... geez...
Speedy: He kicked you out too, huh, Narrator?
Narrator: Yup.. what a twit, eh?
Guido: Actually, I think it was good that we left. They're already half naked in there. Imagine what will happen if thier romance sparks when she wakes up.
Narrator: Yeah, and this still is sort of a young adult's series, huh?
Speedy: Exactly... imagine what would happen if we had to put *THAT* on our show... we'd be canceled in a second.
ACiD: Well... she's awake, and, no, we didn't do anything too romantic...
Fran: Well, except the kissing and the hugs and stuff.
ACiD: Well, yeah, but not too much further than that.
Fran: Anyhow, we're gonna go out for a midnight dinner at Art Friskas... cya all later!
ACiD: Bye!
Guido: Wait.. how can you afford Art Friskas, on your salary?
ACiD: He owes me big time... so I said "Art, just let me eat here whenever I want, and we'll be even." So now I get to eat free at Art's whenever I please.... and I really want to now...
Polly: Oh the fun of a first love. Speedy, let's go up top and do some stargazing.
Speedy: Sounds great.... let's go.
Guido: Well.. I'm alone now. I'll go visit with Lucille.
Shadow #4: So you sold the stuff to her, *KNOWING* that the other three wouldn't eat the chocolates?
Shadow #6: Then, you called them after AJ and Fran ate the chocolates, and told them how to cure the unconcious state?
Shadow #1: Yup... it was the perfect double cross.
Shadow #3: Well.. keep up that kind of work, and you'll be *MAKING* that stuff before long.
Shadow #2: Thank you sirs.
Yeah, I know it's a little bit of a X-files-ish ending, but, still, it was pretty good.
--ACiDFiSh
(
geocities.com/tokyo)