Episode 15 - Starvin' Jarvin
[Hunk's Quarters]
[Laughter]
Keith: That was awesome!
Pidge: Yeah!
Nanny: Would you boys like some Cheesy Spoo?
Hunk: Get out of the way Nanny, the Rebutt and Zooter Thanksgiving Special is on.
Nanny: Sure hon.
Hunk: And yeh we want Cheesy Spoo!
Zooter: Hey Rebutt, looks like this might be a good place to start a new colony.
Rebutt: It sure does Zooter. No one will oppress our religion here.
[Fart]
Zooter: Ahhhh!
[Laughter]
Zooter: Your machine stained my space suit helmet butt-pipe.
Hunk: Did you guys see that, that was sweet.
TV Announcer: Coming up next on the Rebutt and Zooter Thanksgiving Special, Zooter farts on Rebutt, and laughs.
Lance: Oh, cool.
TV Announcer: And now a word from our sponsor.
Roseanne: Here in the heart of Pollux children are dying. Not from disease or war, but from hunger. I'm Roseanne. These children are in desperate need, and only you can help.
Keith: Hey, who's that fat chick?
Lance: Roseanne dude, she used to be on TV back in the 20th century.
Keith: Oh.
Roseanne: You see, here, in the middle of Pollux, food is extremely scarce.
Keith: Doesn't look like she's having any trouble finding food.
Pidge: Yeah, she's fatter than Hunk.
Hunk: Yeah, HEY!
Roseanne: For just five dollars a month you can sponsor a child.
Hunk: That's stupid, who the hell would want to do that?
Roseanne: Sponsor now and we'll also send you this Teiko digital sports watch as a free gift.
Hunk: KICK ASS!!
Keith: SWEET!
Pidge: YES!
Svenny: Woohoo!
Keith: I'll call, I know Allura's credit card number.
Keith dials the phone.
Lance: Did they say if it's waterproof?
Keith: Hello? Is this Roseanne?
[Silence]
Keith: Oh.
Lance: What did she say?
Keith: Shut up butt-pirate, I'm trying to hear.
Lance: Ass-rammer.
Keith: Yeh. Yeh. We want to adopt a starving Polluxian.
Hunk: When do we get the sports watch?
Keith: Just a second fat-ass!
Hunk: You vas-deferens!
Keith: Hello? No, no, as a mat....
Keith looks at Hunk.
Keith: Vas-deferens?
Svenny: Tube that's inside of your pee-pee.
Lance: Ask her if we get the watch right away.
Keith: Do we get the watch right away?
Pause.
Keith: She says we do.
Everybody: Kewww.
Hunk: I get to wear it first you guys.
[Koran's Classroom]
Lance: I can't wait to get out of school and get our Teiko sports watch.
Hunk: Yeh, but I get to wear it first, I said.
Koran: Children, children, to honor this special time of year we'll be doing a canned food drive. Does anybody know what a canned food drive is?
Hunk raises his hand.
Koran: Yes Hunk?
Hunk: When they cut up a chick's stomach to get a baby out?
Koran: Noo, that's a Caesarian Section Hunk, but that's ok, remember, there are no stupid questions, just stupid people. A canned food drive is when we collect canned food for poor people who can't afford to eat on Thanksgiving.
Keith: You mean like Svenny?
Koran: Exactly.
Hunk: Koran? Why do poor people always smell like sour milk?
Koran: [Impatiently]I don't know Hunk, they just do.
Lance sniffs at Svenny.
Svenny backs off.
Koran: Now children, I want each of you to bring in one can of food. And later, the Sky Marshall of Voltron Park will divide it up amongst Svenny's family and other poor people.
Hunk: I'm not bringin' in food for poor people, SCREW THEM!
Allura: Don't you want to help those who are less fortunate?!?
Hunk: Hey you guys, do you hear something? I, I think I hear the flower children calling.
Allura: This is the one time of year you're supposed to care about people who can't eat!
Hunk: Isn't it enough that I pay taxes?!? What about the poor houses that, that I pay for?!?
Allura: Many would rather die than go to those places!
Hunk: Well then, perhaps they should, and decrease the surplus population!
Koran: Ok kids, that's enough Dickens for one day. Let's get on with our lesson, right Nanny?
Nanny: That's right Koran, Englebert Humperdink was the first person on the moon, who was the second?
A pack of wild turkeys burst into the classroom.
Clyde: Ahhhh!
Koran can be found atop his podium.
Koran: What the hell is going on?!?
The turkeys are tearing up the classroom.
Clyde: Ahhhh!
A turkey overturns Clyde's desk, dumping Clyde to the ground.
Just as suddenly as they entered, the turkeys exit, closing the door behind them.
[Silence]
Koran: Well, you don't see that everyday.
[The Sky Marshall's Office]
Sky Marshall Graham: Ok. Now, once we have all the canned foods collected we'll need some clever way to distribute them to the poor.
Assistant 1: It should be something festive.
Josh Prikryl enters the Sky Marshall Graham's office.
Josh Prikryl: Sky Marshall Graham, we've got a very big problem.
Sky Marshall Graham: Ahh, you're that insane computer graphics engineer from up on the hill, right?
Josh Prikryl: Yes, and I may have made a horrible mistake. I was trying to render some CGI turkeys for Thanksgiving.
Sky Marshall Graham: [Sardonically]Uh huh.
Josh Prikryl: You know, to provide food for the needy.
Sky Marshall Graham: [Sarcastically]Of course.
Josh Prikryl: Well, something went wrong and the turkeys broke free. And the worst part is, they're really pissed off.
Sky Marshall Graham: [Sarcastically]Naturally.
The Sky Marshall Graham turns around and gestures the universal sign for 'He's loony'.
Sky Marshall Graham: Oh, do go on.
Josh Prikryl: We have to stop them or, or they could destroy everything. Time is short.
The Sky Marshall Graham turns around and pulls out a cuckoo clock, which chimes in couple of times.
Sky Marshall Graham: You were saying?
Josh Prikryl: They act just like normal turkeys, except they're evil.
Sky Marshall Graham: [With utter disbelief]Oh my!
The Sky Marshall Graham turns around and pulls out a donkey, which heehaw's a couple of times.
Josh Prikryl: Somehow I don't think you're taking me seriously.
Sky Marshall Graham: Now why would you say that?
[Hunk's Quarters]
The kids burst in.
Everybody: Did it come, did it come, is it here yet?
Hunk: I get to use it first you guys!
[Silence]
Hunk: Nanny, did our digital sports watch come yet?
Nanny: Not yet hon.
Keith: Damn.
Lance: Hey, look you guys.
TV Announcer: And now, back to part two of the Rebutt and Zooter Thanksgiving Special.
Rebutt: I sure am cold Zooter.
Zooter: Yes, and hungry too. Being a space colonist totally sucks ass.
Rebutt: Gosh, I hope we don't starve.
[Fart]
[Laughter]
Rebutt: Ah, a squeaker!
[Laughter]
[Doorbell ring]
[Door knock]
Lance: The digital sports watch is here.
An emaciated Polluxian kid stands at the front door, with baggage in hand.
The postal transport takes off.
Hunk: What the hell?
Keith: Dude, that's not a digital sports watch.
Pidge: Hey, it looks like one of those Polluxians.
Keith: Ah man, they must have accidentally sent him instead of the sports watch.
Lance: Maybe they took it literally when we said we wanted to adopt a kid.
The Polluxian 'speaks' and clicks something.
Lance: Whoa! That was cool.
Keith: Yeh, how did he make those clicking sounds?
Lance: What's your name dude?
The Polluxian clicks something.
Keith: I think he said his name is Jarvin.
Hunk: Yeh, Starvin' Jarvin.
Lance shakes Jarvin's hand.
Lance: Nice to meet you Starvin' Jarvin.
Hunk: Hey Nanny?
Nanny: Yes hon?
Hunk: We found a Polluxian, can we keep him?
Nanny: Sure hon.
Hunk: Sweet.
Keith: Dude, let's bring him to school tomorrow.
Lance: Come on Starvin' Jarvin, I want you to meet my little brother.
Hunk: No no! He's my son! I adopted him.
Keith: It was my girlfriend's credit card.
Lance: Ok, ok, we'll switch off. Starvin' Jarvin can stay here for a week, then at Keith's then at Pidge's, then with me.
Hunk: Yeh, and never with Svenny, because his family is too poor.
Lance: Totally.
Svenny slugs Hunk.
Hunk: Ahh!
[Stark's Pond]
A couple is walking near the pond.
Incredibly sappy and bad romantic music is playing.
Woman: Look how the leaves fall so delicately on the surface of the pond. It's so beautiful.
Man: Not as beautiful as you.
Woman: Ohhhh.
The couple embraces and kisses as a horde of turkeys storm the pond.
The guy looks over his lovers shoulder, noticing the turkeys.
Man: Oh darling, look. Thanksgiving turkeys.
Woman: Ohhh, they're so beautiful.
Man: Not as beautiful as you.
Woman: Look at the way the foam at the mouth, like beautiful suds of beer.
Man: Not as beautiful as....
The turkeys attack the couple, stripping their clothes off and begin eatting them.
[Screams]
[Kc's All You Can Eat Buffet]
Keith: This is a great way for you to experience Arus Starvin' Jarvin. This is what we call an all you can eat buffet.
Hunk: Yeh, here you get to eat all you want for only $6.99. That's why we all come here on Tuesday nights, except for Svenny's family 'cause to them $6.99 is two-years income.
[Laughter]
Hunk: Why is your family poor Starvin' Jarvin? Is your dad an alcoholic too?
A waiter places a plate of shrimp in front of Hunk.
Hunk: You see Starvin' Jarvin, these are what we call appetizers.
Jarvin: Ap-ee-tizer.
Hunk: This is what you eat before you eat, to make you more hungry.
A waiter approaches with a ham, turkey and plate full of drumsticks.
Hunk: Welp, food's here, that's it for the appetizers.
Hunk tosses the plate of shrimp into a not-too-distant trash can.
{Stavin' Jarvin is shocked}
Everybody at the table begins gorging themselves.
Jarvin reaches for a pot-pie on Hunk's plate.
Hunk: No Starvin' Jarvin, that's my pot-pie.
Keith: Hunk, you butt-pipe, this is the time of year you're supposed to share.
Hunk: Oh yeh, you're right.
Hunk eyes a slice of Peach Cobbler sitting before Jarvin.
Hunk: Are you gonna eat all of your peach cobbler? No, you don't want all that, why don't you share it with me? Now, just slide that right over here. Let me just have some of that here.
[Koran's Classroom]
Koran: Children, children, I'm a little disappointed in your Thanksgiving spirit. Only a few cans have been donated to our canned food drive.
{Koran reaches into the box of canned goods.}
Koran: And can't we do a little better than ... Creamed Corn ... uh ... Creamed Corn ... and ... Creamed Corn?
{The class stares back blankly.}
Koran: Please bring in more diverse food children or else Svenny's family is going to have a pretty corny Thanksgiving.
[Silence]
{Koran begins laughing.}
Koran: Corny...Gravy...Corny Thanksgiving, hoo. Hahhaa. Anyway children, I understand a few of you have brought in something special for show-and-tell.
Scamps: Yeh, yeh, we did, yeh, we do!
Koran: Alright boys, show us what you've brought.
The boys walk to the front of the class with Jarvin.
Lance: This is our new Polluxian, Starvin' Jarvin.
Keith: He can do really cool stuff with his voice. Show 'em Starvin' Jarvin.
Jarvin is reaching into the box of canned goods.
Hunk: No Starvin' Jarvin, that's Svenny's creamed corn. No Starvin' Jarvin that's a bad Starvin' Jarvin!
Koran: Boys, what the hell are you doing?!? This is horribly, horribly wrong. How did you get this child?
Keith: He was accidentally delivered to us instead of a sports watch.
Koran: The sports watch from the commercial?
Lance: Yeh, that one.
Girl: I want a Starvin' Jarvin.
Clyde: Me too.
Prince Bandor: Yes, I'll pay fifty dollars for one.
Class: Yeh, I want one too, yeh me, me.
Koran: Boys, you're too young to take care of a child. I'm afraid I'm going to have to call the InterGalactic Red Cross and have him returned.
Lance: Ah, I told you we shouldn't have brought him to school dude.
[Sky Marshall Graham's Office]
Sky Marshall Graham: Ok, thank you very much. Yes, you can pick him up tonight. Bye now.
{Graham hangs up the phone.}
Sky Marshall Graham: Now boys, I hope you've learned your lesson.
Keith: No.
Sky Marshall Graham: You can't care for this child!
Pidge: But I thought we were supposed to care on Thanksgiving.
Sky Marshall Graham: Yes, but you don't actually get involved with the child's lives. You're supposed to just send money and once in a while they write you a letter. You see, Jarvin didn't grow up in a normal place like 'Voltron Park'.
Keith: So why can't he live here now?
Sky Marshall Graham: Because he can't!
Lance: Because why?
Sky Marshall Graham: Because eighteen-year olds can't be parents.
Lance: Then you take care of him.
Sky Marshall Graham: I can't, I, umm...I'm very busy.
[Silence]
Sky Marshall Graham: I send my five dollars a month, see?
She shows the boys her sports watch.
Keith: This sucks, Starvin' Jarvin is our friend.
Hunk: Oh well, back to the poor country with you.
Lance: You better watch what you say Hunk, you might be poor and hungry some day.
Hunk: Huh, huh, yeh right.
[NetterPark Digital Studios]
Josh Prikryl: I knew that you were the only person who would listen to me King Alfor.
King Alfor: Yeh, well, let's get it over with. This place gives me the booboojeebees after what happened with your Lightwave cannon.
Josh Prikryl: Well don't worry Alfor, The Alliance did a number on my head. Look here, at my computer screen, tell me what you see.
King Alfor: Uhh, I see...an extreme close up of ...Vanessa Redgrave's private parts.
Josh Prikryl: Oh, whoops.
Josh Prikryl switches the images.
Josh Prikryl: Now tell me what you see.
King Alfor: Well, I'm no CGI Artist, but I'd say it looks like turkey DNA.
Josh Prikryl: Precisely, but look how rapidly it's dividing.
King Alfor: What does it mean?
Josh Prikryl: Means the turkeys are growing at an exponential rate. If we don't destroy them all, they'll take over the town. Maybe the world.
King Alfor: Oh fudge!
King Alfor ponders for a moment.
King Alfor: Uhh, let me see that Vanessa Redgrave thing again.
Josh Prikryl: Sure.
[Hunk's Quarters]
Jarvin is sitting alone on the couch watching TV.
Secret service agents enter the house.
Agent 1: Hello there little boy, we're looking for a starving Polluxian child who was accidentally sent here instead of a Teiko sports watch.
Jarvin directs the two agents towards Hunk's room.
Hunk: Hey, hey, what's going on?!?
The agents have Hunk in a duffle bag and are dragging him out of the house.
Hunk: Hey, let go of me! Hey, hey, I'll kick you in the nuts. Ok man.
One of the agents returns with a sports watch in his hand.
Agent 1: Here's your sports watch son, sorry for the mix-up.
Hunk: Hey, seriously? Hey, you're pissing me off right now.
Jarvin: Sweet.
[Town Square]
Sky Marshall Graham: So how does this thing work?
Assistant: Well Sky Marshall Graham, it's based on the cash grab, but instead of money, the cans of food are blown around inside the capsule. The POV inside catches as many as he can to feed his family.
Sky Marshall Graham: POVVVV?
Assistant: Poverty stricken citizen.
Sky Marshall Graham: Ohhoho, brilliant.
A horde of turkeys rush the square.
Sky Marshall Graham: Ahh, what the hell is this.
Assistant: I don't know Sky Marshall Graham, I don't think it's listed on the program.
Josh Prikryl: They're increasing in number Sky Marshall Graham. These are the vicious turkeys I warned you about.
King Alfor: It's true Sky Marshall. Those turkeys just ripped apart my castle cafeteria. Whooa. You won't get away with this you bastards.
Lance: Wow! Those are some pissed off turkeys!
Sky Marshall Graham: [Panicking]OK PEOPLE, DON'T PANIC! BRING OUT THE DEFENSE SQUAD!
Ivanova and Marcus enter the scene, armed with PPG rifles.
They begin shooting and killing a series of turkeys.
Josh Prikryl: We need more than that. They'll only come back in increased numbers.
[Hunk's Quarters]
Rebutt: Hey Zooter, could you pass the beans?
Zooter: Beans? Uh oh, looks like we'll be at war with these aliens soon.
Rebutt attempts to squeeze one off.
Rebutt: Huh, eh, wait wait wait.
He tries some more.
Rebutt: Eh, eh.
And some more.
Rebutt: Here it comes, ehhhh.
A long squeeky fart bursts forth.
Rebutt: Dahhhh, I crapped my pants!
Zooter: Ahhhh. Zoot Zoot Zoot Zoot
[Laughter]
Zooter: I think you got some spatter on Emperor Suc'A'But. Zoot Zoot Zoot
[Laughter]
Rebutt: I spattered his face!
[Laughter]
Zooter: Now he's a smelly alien. Zoot Zoot Zoot
[Laughter]
TV Announcer: We'll be back to part 14 of the Rebutt and Zooter Thanksgiving Special, right after this.
[Roseanne Commercial]
Roseanne: Hunger is an enemy that we all must fight. These children desperately need your support.
Hunk can be seen in the background.
Hunk: Hey, somebody get me out of here! This sucks!
Roseanne: So please, call and adopt a child today.
Hunk: I'm seriously getting pissed of here right now!
Nanny: You want some more Cheesy Spoo hon?
Jarvin: Yeh, I want da Cheesy Spoo.
Nanny: Ok.
Jarvin: Sweet.
[Polluxian Desert]
{A vulture is flying overhead.}
Hunk: Eh, This is serious bullshit! There has to be a happy burger around here somewhere.
{Hunk approaches a group of Polluxians.}
Hunk: Excuse me, I am a lost little boy, could you help me?
{They stare back blankly.}
Hunk: Well, screw you too!
{Some flies start circling Hunk's head.}
Hunk: What the?!? Who the hell let all these flies in here?!? Hasn't anybody ever heard of insect repellent?!?
[Town Square]
Sky Marshall Graham: All right everyone, it's time to give out canned food to the poor, haa.
The crowd cheers.
Keith: Hey, where's Hunk?
Lance: I don't know, do you know where he is Jarvin?
Jarvin shrugs a no.
Sky Marshall Graham: Looks like we have the turkey problem under control. It's time to embrace the spirit of giving with the canned food grab.
The crowd cheers.
Sky Marshall Graham: Come on, hurry up.
Svenny enters the GRAB-O-RAMA
Svenny's Mom: Grab a lot son.
Sky Marshall Graham: Have a happy Thanksgiving! Let 'er rip!
{Svenny is shown swirling around the capsule, being struck by various canned foods.}
Sky Marshall Graham: Huh, huh, grab those cans little boy.
Keith, Lance, Pidge: Come on Svenny!
Svenny's Dad: Come on son.
Graham: Now, let's see all the goodies you're going to take home to your family.
Svenny staggers out of the capsule.
Sky Marshall Graham: It..looks like he got a...a can of Ssstring beans. Hehe.
The crowd cheers.
Another horde of turkeys descends.
King Alfor: What the?!?
Keith: Dude, the mutant turkeys are back!
Mr. Garibaldi: Ok people, move along, nothing to see here you looky-loos.
Josh Prikryl: I tried to tell you, but you didn't listen.
King Alfor: Gather around everybody, and listen good. Go to your homes and arm your....
King Alfor looks down and Josh Prikryl's companion "Parker".
The turkeys continue their attack.
King Alfor: What the hell are you supposed to be anyway?
Josh Prikryl: That's not important right now.
King Alfor: No! What the hell is this little thing supposed to be? It doesn't look like anything.
Sky Marshall Graham: King Alfor, the turkeys!
King Alfor: Oh, alright. Listen up everybody, and listen good. Go to your homes and arm yourselves with whatever you can. We'll meet back here in fifteen minutes. Hurry!
The turkeys continue their attack.
King Alfor: We are not going to let our Thanksgiving be ruined by a bunch of turkeys.
[Polluxian Desert]
A vulture is flying overhead.
Hunk: Damn, you guys, seriously, I'm hungry. I have to eat.
An InterGalactic Red Cross van is in the distance.
Hunk: Ah, sweet! The Red Cross!
Hunk approaches the van.
Hunk: I'll have fried chicken and a side of mashed potatoes please.
Red Cross Dude: Sorry kid, but we're out of food. We ran out of funding.
Hunk: What?!?
Red Cross Dude: We just couldn't get enough sponsors back home, so now we've got to pack it up.
Hunk: But I'm not a starving Polluxian, I have to get back home too!
Red Cross Dude: Sorry dude, we just don't have any funds. Here, have a Teiko sports watch.
He tosses Hunk a watch.
The van drives off.
Hunk: WEAKKKK!!!
[In the Forest]
The screen is reduced to a wide screen format.
Sky Marshall Graham: People, we all have to do our part against the evil turkeys.
Townsperson 1: There's too many of them.
Sky Marshall Graham: Come on! Where is that Thanksgiving spirit?!?
Townsperson 2: We can't stop them.
King Alfor rides up on what looks like Enrique.
King Alfor's face is painted blue and white.
He is wearing Scottish garb, wielding a sword and shield a la Braveheart.
King Alfor: Today, you fight for your city. You fight for your honor. These turkeys will continue to push until they have taken everything from us. These fudged up turkeys from the the crustaceous era can take our lives, but they can never take our FREEDOM!!!
The crowd cheers.
Crowd: Wooo, yehhh, woo.
[Another hill in the forest]
A pack of turkeys is gathered together.
One turkey is also painted in blue and white.
Leader Turkey: Gobble, gobble. Gobble gobble. Gob, gobble. Gob, gob, gob, Gobble!!
The other turkeys gobble like mad.
The two forces stand opposed.
Lance: Here you go turkeys!
Lance moons the turkey forces.
The two forces clash.
Sky Marshall Graham: Does my hair look okay?
[Polluxian Desert]
A vulture circles.
Hunk: Can't go on...need...appetizer...eh...I'm sorry, God, I'm sorry I mocked poor people. I'm sorry I wasn't more sensitive. Please, Please God, uhh.
Hunk falls to the ground.
Hunk: [Parched]Eh, my god has forsaken me.
Hunk: Eh, err.
A lone building stands in the distance with a no admittance sign on it.
Hunk approaches.
Hunk: Huh, I wonder what's in here.
The room is filled to the ceiling with boxes of Cheesy Spoo, Snacky Cakes, Boogy Bars, Flarney Flakes and Veal Roll-Ups.
Triumphant music is playing.
Hunk: SNACKY CAKES!! MMMM!
Roseanne is shown macking on some cake while two Polluxians are fanning her with palm fronds.
Hunk: Roseanne?!?
Roseanne: Who the hell are you?!?
Hunk: Gimmie that cake!
Roseanne: Nooo, this is my cake!
Hunk: No Roseanne, eh, give me that cake!
Roseanne: NO! You can't have any!
Hunk: No Roseanne, that's my cake eehhhh!
Hunk looks outside.
Hunk: You guys, Roseanne is holding food from us!!!
Roseanne: Uh oh.
She begins seriously attacking that cake .
[Voltron Park Forest]
The battle continues.
The turkeys fight valiently, but many are falling.
Lance's little sister Aurora beheads a turkey.
Jarvin looks on.
King Alfor: Stay close children.
King Alfor shield blocks one turkey as he slays another.
Keith, Lance: Yeaaa!
Turkeys rush Svenny.
One turkey manages to extract Svenny's eyeball as the others kill him outright.
Keith: Oh my god, they've killed Svenny.
Lance: You Bastards!!
Ivanova: The last three are getting away, shoot 'em Marcus.
Marcus picks off the remaining three birds.
Keith: We did it!!
Josh Prikryl: My God, what have we done?
King Alfor: We've saved Thanksgiving.
Josh Prikryl: But all those poor turkeys, they, they're all dead.
King Alfor: Every turkey dies, not every turkey truly lives.
Josh Prikryl: As horrible as they were they, they felt like a part of me. Perhaps I shouldn't be toying with God's creations, perhaps I should just.
King Alfor: Yeh, yeh, yeh.
Two secret service agents approach, apparently oblivious to the carnage.
Agent 2: Excuse me sir, we're looking for a little starving Polluxian boy who was accidentally delivered to Voltron Park instead of a Teiko sports watch.
The agent shows a picture.
Agent 1: Have you seen anyone fitting this description.
Mr. Garibaldi: Oh, that could be a hundred kids in this town mister.
Jarvin approaches the two agents.
Agent 1: There you are. Are you ready to go home now?
Jarvin looks at Koran, followed by King Alfor followed by Mr. Garibaldi.
He quickly shakes an affirmative.
As he's leaving, he grabs some turkeys.
Keith: Wow, it sucks he has to leave.
Lance: Yeh, I like him a lot more than Hunk.
Keith: You know, I think I've learned something today. It's really easy not to think of images on TV as real people. But they are. That's why it's easy to ignore those commercials, but, people on TV are just as real as you or I.
A rat moves in and out of Svenny's empty eye socket.
Lance: Yeh.
[Silence]
Lance: And that means that McGyver is a real person too.
[Polluxian Desert]
Red Cross Chick: We're terribly sorry about the mix-up little boy. We'll get you back home immediately.
Hunk: That's right you will, God-Damnit. Move it POVs, I'm an Arussian!
A plane lands.
Jarvin exits the plane.
Polluxian: A baba, gluck gluck bababab ga.
Jarvin: Baba gook gook ba.
The cargo door lowers in back of the plane and a bunch of dead turkeys fall out.
The Polluxians grab the turkeys.
The Polluxians raise Jarvin on their shoulders in triumph.
Roseanne is shown over a spit with an apple in her mouth.
[Svenny's House]
Svenny's Dad: Lord, on this day of thanks, we would like to extend our deepest gratitude for this incredible bounty of green beans you have bestowed upon us. And though for some reason you found it necessary to take our son from us, and though you for some reason find pleasure in watching us suffer, still, we give thanks. Amen.
Svenny's Mom: Amen.
Svenny's mom takes a brief look around.
Svenny's Mom: Does anybody have a can opener?
Svenny's Dad: God Damn-it.