Episode 23

Episode 23 - Death

[Pidge's House]
Pidge's Family: Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear grandpa...
Grandpa: Uhhhhh
Pidge's Family: Happy birthday to you.
Pidge's Mom: Now blow out the candles grandpa.
{Grandpa attempts to wheeze out the candles}
Pidge's Family: Hey!!!
Pidge's Dad: How's it feel to be a hundred and two paps?
Grandpa: Shoot me.
Pidge's Mom: Make a wish grandpa.
Grandpa: I wish I were dead
Pidge's Dad: Ha, ha, ha, that's our silly grandpa.
Grandpa: I'm not being silly, kill me. I'd do it myself, but I'm too damn old.
Pidge's Mom: Ooh, who wants ice cream with their cake?
Monica Lewinski: I will.
Pidge's Dad: Me.
Pidge: It's eight o'clock, my favorite TV show is on.
Monica: That showsh for babiesh, it'sh show shtupid.
Pidge: Shut up Hoover, you shouldn't even be here! Mom, Can I eat my cake in the living room mom? Please, can I?
Pidge's Mom: Oh, alright, but take your grampy with you.
Pidge: Ah, damn it!
Pidge's Mom: Language.

[In front of the TV]
TV Announcer: And now back to 'Rebutt & Zooter'
Zooter: Hey Rebutt, I think I have to fart.
Rebutt: Wait, before you do, pull my thumb. {Zooter rips a juicy one}
[Laughter]
Zooter: Zoot Zoot Zoot.
Grandpa: Uhhhhh
{Pidge is laughing.}
{Grandpa is attempting to line a shotgun up with his face.}
[Boom]
Grandpa: Ah, damn it!
{Grandpa turns to Pidge}
Grandpa: How would you like to make a dollar Billy?
Pidge: My name's not Billy grandpa, it's Pidge.
Grandpa: Damn it Billy, do you want a dollar or don't ya?
Pidge: Sure.
Grandpa: Ok. You just have to do one thing for me.
Pidge: I'm not gonna kill you grandpa.
Grandpa: Why not?
Pidge: Cause, I'll get in trouble.
Grandpa: I killed my grandpa when I was your age.
Pidge: Leave me alone grandpa.
[Fart]
[Laughter]
Grandpa: What has the Arussian youth come to? Kids won't even kill their own grandparents.

[Lance's House]
{Aurora and Lance are in front of the TV}
Zooter: Hey Rebutt, now that you've farted, I think I might fart too.
[fart]
[laughter]
Rebutt: Ohhh, you farted.
{Lance is laughing pretty hard.}
Lance's mom: Lance, boopie, what are you watching?
Rebutt: Hey Zooter, would you like a flower?
Zooter: I sure would Rebutt.
Rebutt: Alrighty then, here's a two-lip.
[fart]
[laughter]
Lance's mom: What is this? It's horrible!
Lance: Dude, it's 'Rebutt & Zooter'.
Zooter: Take that you stupid dick.
Lance's mom: What did he say?
Rebutt: You're an asshole Zooter.
Lance's mom: What what what?!!?
[laughter]
Lance's mom: Young man, you are not to watch that show anymore. It's immature toilet humor.
Lance: But everybody watches 'Rebutt & Zooter'.
Lance's mom: Oh really? Is that so?

[Hunk's House]
Rebutt: Oh no Zooter, looks like you're about to fart.
Zooter: You're exactly right Rebutt. Oh.
[fart]
[laughter]
Rebutt: Oh no.
[laughter]
Hunk: Ha, ha, ha, that's sweet!
Hunk's mom: Hunk dear? I just got a call from your friend Lance's mother. She said that this show is naughty, and might make you a potty mouth.
Hunk: That's a bunch of crap! Lance's mom is a dirty Smartass!
Hunk's mom: Ohhh, ok hon.

[Pidge's House]
Pidge: I'm not going to kill you grandpa!
Grandpa: Ingrate!
Pidge: Good night grandpa.
Grandpa: You pompous son of a whore!

[Koran's Class]
Lance: Where's Keith?
Pidge: Oh, he and Allura are on a diplomatic mission to Pollux
Student: Huh huh, I had another ...
Lance: Ow! What the hell was that for?!?
Hunk: That's for your stupid mother! She made me miss 'Rebutt & Zooter' last night!
Clyde: Yeh, what's the big idea having your mom call all our moms last night?
Lance: Well I didn't have her do it. She did it on her own.
Hunk: Why does this happen every month? It seems like, right around the same time every month, Lance's mom gets a hair up her ass about something and I always end up getting screwed by it!
Koran: Children! Children! A certain student's mother called me last night.
Hunk: Oh, jee, I wonder who's mother that could have been?
Koran: She informed me that some of you might be watching a, a naugthy show called 'Rebutt & Zooter'.
Class: Yehh, woohoo!
Mr. Dildo: Watching that show is bad Koran.
Koran: That's right Mr. Dildo, shows like 'Rebutt & Zooter' are what we call 'toilet humor.' They don't expand your minds.
[silence]
Koran: You see children, these kind of shows are senseless, vile trash.
{Svenny walks in.}
Koran: Svenny, why are you late to class?
{Svenny hands Koran a note.}
**The note reads 'Please excuse me from being late, I have a case of explosive Diarreha, signed -S'**
Koran: Oh, ok Svenny, be seated.
Koran: Now, as I was saying, the reason that parents of Voltron Park are so upset is because...
{Svenny is waving his hand frantically.}
Koran: Yes Svenny, what is it?
Svenny: I have to go fart.
Koran: I thought you just came from the bathroom.
Svenny: I did, I gotta go do ...
Koran: Ok ok, go ahead.
{bathroom door creaks open and closed}
Koran: As I was saying, you all seem to enjoy the show, even though it isn't based in reality.
{Sounds of some serious diarreha come from the bathroom}
Koran: There's much more to life than two men farting on each other. And throughout history there have always been shows that have come and gone that have been very bad, and usually they get taken right off the air.
{The sounds continue, only now we hear Svenny obviously not enjoying himself.}
Koran: You see, you should be spending your time enlightning your minds with more intelligent entertainment.
{Svenny reenters the classroom.}
Pidge: Woah, smells like you slaughtered a cow in there Svenny!
[The Class laughs]
Koran: Pay attention children!
{Koran pounds on the lectern.}
Koran: I'm going to join your parents in requesting that you don't watch 'Rebutt & Zooter' any more, ever.
Clyde: What? Not watch 'Rebutt & Zooter' ever?
Koran: That's right children. Are there any questions?
{Pidge has his hand raised.}
Koran: Yes Pidge?
Pidge: Is it ok to kill somebody if the want you to?
[silence]
Koran: What, what do you mean?
Pidge: My grandpa keeps asking that I kill him all the time, and sometimes I wonder if I should.
Lance: Well, then you should. I think that a person has a right to die if they wanna.
Pidge: Really??
Lance: Yeh, there's this guy named Jack Leborkian that goes around and murders people that ask him to, and he doesn't get in any trouble at all.
Pidge: Wow!
Hunk: Hey, maybe we can get him to do Lance's mom!
Pidge: So, is it ok to assist somebody with suicide, Koran?
Koran: Uh, Pidge, I'm not touching that one with a twenty foot pole.
Svenny: Oh my God!
{The bathroom door creaks as Svenny runs into the bathroom}
{Immediately a large splatter of diarreha is let loose by Svenny.}
Svenny: Owww!
[splatterrrrr!]

[School Cafeteria]
Hunk: Man! I can't believe we're gonna miss 'Rebutt & Zooter' today. I think I'm already having withdrawal.
{Hunk starts convulsing and making seizure related sounds.}
Pidge: Don't worry dude, we can all go watch it at my house. My parents don't get home until late.
Lance: But won't your grandpa be there?
Pidge: Yeh...
Hunk: Just kill 'im dude, maybe he'll give you some money.
King Alfor: Hello there children.
Pidge: Hey King Alfor.
King Alfor: How's it goin'?
Pidge: Bad.
King Alfor: Why bad?
Pidge: King Alfor, is it ok to kill your grandpa?
King Alfor: You can't kill my grandpa Pidge, he's already passed on, just like me.
Pidge: No, I mean: kill my grandpa.
King Alfor: No, I don't think that's ok Pidge. In fact, I think that's illegal.
Pidge: See, I told you dude.
Lance: Well, yeh, but what if the grandpa want's to die, cause he's really old, and he's just asking for help?
Hunk: Yeh, like assisted suicide. What about that?
{King Alfor utters a few uhs as he contemplates how to approach the topic...}
King Alfor: I don't want to touch that with a forty foot pole.
Pidge: What's the big deal? Why won't anybody talk about this.

[PTA Meeting]
Lance's mom: And I myself was not aware of this horrible show until recently. I have a clip to demonstrate exactly what I mean.
Rebutt: Hey Zooter, guess what?
Zooter: What?
Rebutt rips a fart as he says:Rebutt: Fart.
Lance's mom: Now apparently, that's supposed to be funny.
Lance's Dad: Heh, heh, heh, he farted right on his head, heh heh, ohhh.
{Other PTA members stare at Pidge's Dad in shock.}
Lance's mom: Not allowing our kids to watch this show is not enough. We need to boycott the entire network! All those in favor...
{Loud, juicy fart comes from the little boys room.}
Koran: Ohh, I think I've caught a touch of the flu from little Svenny this morning. I've got the green apple splatters.
[laughter]
Townsman: Huh, huh, green apple splatters.

[Pidge's House]
Grandpa: Uhhhh
Pidge: Hi grandpa, I brought my friends over to watch TV, if that's ok.
Grandpa: Billy, help grandpa stick this fork in the outlet.
Pidge: No grandpa, I'll get in trouble.
Grandpa: Kill me, God damn it!
Pidge: No, I can't even kill a Robeast.
Grandpa: Well then, have one of your little friends do it. You can kill me can't ya?
Hunk: I would never kill somebody...not unless the piss me off.
Grandpa: Ohh, is that a fact? Well, let me tell you something, Porky. Your mom was over here earlier, and I humped her like a little bitch.
Hunk: What!
Grandpa: That's right.
Pidge: Grandpa!
Grandpa: And then, I dug up your great-grandma's skeleton, and had my way with her too.
Hunk: Hey!
Grandpa: Choice piece of ass, your great-grandma.
Hunk: You piece of crap! I'll kill you!
Grandpa: That's the spirit Tubby.
Pidge: Come on Hunk, he's just trying to get to you.
Hunk: Don't talk about my mom like that!
Pidge: We can go watch 'Rebutt & Zooter' in the kitchen.
Grandpa: I ever tell you about the time I boofed your dad Fatso?
Hunk: Ay, I can't believe that son of a bitch!
Pidge: Here Hunk, have some Snacky Cakes.
Hunk: Oooh, Snacky Cakes, god dang.
Pidge: I don't know what to do dude, my grandpa really wants to die.
Lance: I'm telling you, it's ok. Maybe you should ask the lord for guidance.
Pidge: Hey, yeh!

[Pidge's House, kitchen]
TV Announcer: And now, back to 'Valen and Friends' on Voltron Park Public Access.
Valen: Yea, believe in me and ye shall find peace.
{Valen presses a button on the phone.}
Valen: First caller, you're on 'Valen and Friends'
Sounds of feedback
Martin: Yeh, is this Valen
. Valen: Yes, yes caller, you need to turn your TV down, that's why you're getting that weird feedback.
Martin: Oh, sorry. Uh, this is Martin...
Valen: Martin, from Aspen Park, yes, I know.
Martin: How the hell'd you know that?
Valen: Well, maybe because I'm the greatest spiritual figure in Minbari history, brainiac, now, do you have a question?
[silence]
Martin: Uh, yeh, uh, I have this cousin who, who cheated on the SAT's and
Valen: Tell little Gregory that cheating is lying and lying is wrong, no matter what the circumstance.
Martin: Oh, oh, ok, thanks for the advice, Valen.
{Valen presses a button on the phone.}
Valen: Next caller, you're on the air.
Pidge: Valen?
Valen: Yes my son?
Pidge: Valen, is, is it ok to kill somebody if they ask you to, because they're in a lot of pain, you know, like, assisted suicide, is that ok?
Valen: My son...
Pidge: Yes?
Valen: I'm not touching that with a sixty foot pole.
{Valen presses a button on the phone.}
Valen: Next caller.
Pidge: God damn it!
Valen: I heard that.
Pidge: What the hell is wrong with everybody?
Hunk: Hey you guys, 'Rebutt & Zooter' is on!
Lance: Yeh, hey, do you think we'll get in trouble for watching it?
Pidge: Lance, don't be such a butthole!
Hunk: Yeh, just cause your mom is a stupid bitch doesn't mean the whole world has to suffer.
Lance: Don't call my mom a bitch, Hunk!
Hunk: Oh, biiitch. Your--mom--is--a--bi-bi-bii-biittchh.
TV Announcer: And now back to 'Rebutt & Zooter'.
Rebutt: Hey Zooter, would you like to eat some beans.
Zooter: Oho yeh, I love beans.
Hunk: Uh oh, I bet I know what's coming.
Grandpa: Billy, would you mind holding this for grandpa please?
Pidge: Ok grandpa, ok, just get out of the way of the TV.
Rebutt: Hey Zooter, it looks like those beans might make me fart.
Zooter: Well, don't fart on me Rebutt.
Hunk: Dude, he's gonna fart on his head again.
Svenny: Oh my God!
{Svenny runs to the bathroom.}
Hunk: Hey, you're gonna miss it Svenny.
[fart]
Zooter: You're such an asshole Rebutt.
Rebutt: Haha, charade I am.
[Laughter]
[Disgusting diarreha sounds]
Svenny: Ow!
[Laughter continues]
Hunk: Hurry up Svenny, you're gonna miss the fart.
Monica: Jesus! What the hell are you doing?
Pidge: We're not watching 'Rebutt & Zooter', I swear. I, I mean, Hunk was watching it.
Monica: No, I mean, what the hell are you doing to your grandpa!?!
{Pidge traces the rope he's holding to a hanging grandpa.}
Grandpa: Tug - a - little harder, Billy.
Pidge: Ahh.
{Pidge lets go of the rope.}
{Grandpa falls to the ground, landing on his side.}
Grandpa: Uh, ow.
Monica: You little jerk!
{Monica slugs Pidge in the face.}
Monica: You were trying to kill your grandpa! I'm telling your mom!
Grandpa: Damn it! I was so close.

[TV Screen]
TV Announcer: Four third graders from Voltron Park, Arus, were found trying to vicously murder an innocent grandfather.
Talk Show Host: Boys, how did you get driven so far to the edge? What changed you into such demonic little bastards?
Pidge: We didn't know what we were doing. We were just sitting there, watching 'Rebutt & Zooter' and ....
Talk Show Host: Rebutt & Zooter', aha! So it is that show that is to blame.

[In front of Ami's Rhinoplasty]
Pidge's mom: These boys minds have been tainted by the garbage on ISN that they see, and we are fed up!
Crowd: Woooo!
Townsman: Huh? Oh god! Oh god!
{A Voltron Parkian runs into a 'Port-a-potty'}
Pidge's mom: We have to stop this smut from going on the air. We will march to the network and protest until our demands are met. New York, here we come!
{Sound of a deep, sonorous fart, with juice.}

[In front of Cartoon Central]
Pidge's mom: We are spreading the word to this establishment that we demand better television, for our children!
{Loud cheering from the crowd.}
Pidge's mom: We want more quality television, like 'Full House'.
{Loud cheering from the crowd.}
Pidge's Dad: Oh, I think you gave me the stomach flu Koran.
Koran: No, no, it was that little Svenny bastard that gave it to me.
Pidge's Dad: Whoa Sky Marshall, you, uh, making gravy in there? Heh, heh, heh, heh.
Sky Marshall Graham: I just had a brown baby boy.
[laughter]

[Pidge's House]
{Pidge's house is in disarray.}
{The kids are playing ball and flying kites.}
Pidge: Dude, this is sweet, not having parents around.
Lance: Yeh, I hope they protest TV shows forever.
Pidge: Whoopeee!
Grandpa: Come here Billy, I want to show you something.
Pidge: Ahh, do I have to?
Grandpa: Yes you do, you little pecker!
Grandpa: I realized that the reason you won't kill me is because you don't underPidged how I feel, Billy. But now I found a way to show you what it feels like to be a grandpa.
Pidge: Hey, what are you doing?!?
{Grandpa loads a cassette into a tape player.}
Lance: What are they doing in there?
Hunk: I don't know.
Grandpa: Now, you're about to see what it's like to be as old as me. Are you ready Billy?
Pidge: Uh, I guess.
{Grandpa starts the tape, it is a really distorted sounding version of Enya's 'Orinoco Flow(Sail Away)'}
Pidge: Ok, you, you can let me out now.
Grandpa: Not just yet.
Pidge: Let me out grandpa!
[Grandpa turns up the volume]
Pidge: I can't take it anymore, this music is terrible, it's, it's cheesy, but lame and eerily soothing at the same time.
Grandpa: That's it, now you know what it feels like to be grandpa.
{Pidge falls out of the room, looking very haggard.}
Pidge: Eh, grandpa, I had no idea how bad it was for you. Now I understand.
Grandpa: So now will you kill me Billy?
Pidge: Sure I will grandpa, I will.

[In front of Cartoon Central, Geneva, Earth Alliance]
Hunk's mom: Hehh, it doesn't look like our protest is working.
Lance's mom: It'll work, it has to.
Townsman: Look! It's the president of the network.
John Warsog: Ladies and gentlemen, my name is John Warsog, I've prepared a statement for you on behalf of the network.
{He clears his throat a couple of times...}
John Warsog: Fuck you.
John Warsog: Thank you ladies and gentlemen. If there any questions, you may direct them to that brick wall over there.
{He walks back into the building.}
Lance's mom: Hey, you will not get away with this!
{He moons the crowd.}
{They gasp in shock.}
{He closes the door behind him.}
Lance's mom: That does it, no more Mr. Nice Protesters. It's time for 'Plan B'.
Hunk's mom: Ohho, Carol, where are the Porta-Potties?
Pidge's mom: Over there hon, what, you need to drop some friends off at the pool?
Hunk's mom: Ohhh, yes, indeedy.
{They laugh.}

[Outside of Pidge's house somewhere]
Pidge: Ok grandpa, all you have to do is sit there. We'll do the rest.
Pidge: [To Lance]You got the cow all tied up?
Lance: Yep, all done.
Pidge: Kay, come on guys.
{Sounds of the boys struggling to lift a cow over grandpa's head.}
Hunk: Why don't we just shoot him?
Pidge: You dumbass Hunk, it has to look natural, or else we'll all get busted.
Lance: Yeh, stupid!
Grandpa: That's good Billy, a little higher now.
Cow: Moooo!

[In front of Cartoon Central]
Lance's mom: The network is not taking us seriously. In the past, people have had to die for what they believed in, and we are prepared to do the same. Ready?
Mr. McKormick positions himself in front of a large sling shot.
Mr. McKormick, you shall be a martyr to us all. God Speed. We will not let these corporate half-wits ruin our children's minds. Launch!
{Mr. McKormick is flung into the front of the Cartoon Central building, splattering into bloody death.}
[Gasp]
Lance's mom: We will all follow suit, one by one if that's what it takes.
{Sounds of abdominal pains as people line up to the porta-potties.}

[Outside of Pidge's house somewhere]
Pidge: Are you ready grandpa?
Grandpa: Does the pope crap in the woods?
[silence]
Mr. Garibaldi drives up.
{He is staring at the scene of a cow dangling above grandpa by a rope.}
{Pidge stands off to the side, knife in hand, ready to cut the rope.}
Police Radio: 73-5, code 6 - 105, North Avenue, 52.
Cow: Mooo!
Mr. Garibaldi: Carry on.
{Mr. Garibaldi starts the car back up and drives away.}
Pidge: Ok, here we go. Bye grandpa, it was nice knowing you.
Grandpa: Uhh, cut the damn rope already!
{Sounds of thunder.}
{Lightning flashes}
Pidge: What is that?!?
Lance: Well, it, it looks like...Death!
Death: Mrrrrr!
Grandpa: It's about time you lazy ass son of a whore.
{Death approaches grandpa.}
Grandpa: Come on, let's go.
{Death continues past grandpa, towards the kids.}
Grandpa: What the?
Pidge: Hey, he's coming towards us.
Lance: Why is death coming after us?
Death: Mrrr.
Kids: Ahhh!

[Pidge's House]
{The kids run away, into Pidge's house.}
{They run towards Pidge's room, Death in hot pursuit.}
{Pidge struggles to open the door.}
Hunk: Ahhhh, run, run, run.
{Finally, they enter the room.}
{Pidge bars the door with his body.}
Death: Mrrr.
{Death bangs on the door.}
Lance: What are we gonna do?
Death: Mooorrrr!
Lance: Where's The Senshi of Death when ya need her?
[Hunk looks at Lance]
Hunk: Seriously, you need to spend less time in Tokyo. Your becoming obsessed with your little friends in mini skirts.
Lance: Fukus, not Mini Skirts.

[In front of Cartoon Central]
Newscaster: As the day progresses, more and more Voltron Park residents continue to sling shot their bodies into the side of the 'Toon Central building. Toon Central is now under incredible pressure to cancel the show, and has already lost over 20% of their sponsors.
Lance's mom: Here Carol, I think it's your boy.
Pidge's Mom: Oh thanks. What is it Pidge-hon, did you break something?
Pidge: [Panicked] Mom! Death is here, and and and he's trying to take us all away with him!
Pidge's Mom: Pidge, honey, you need to leave mommy alone, I'm doing something very, very important for your little well-being there.
Pidge: Yeh, but, mom!
Pidge's Mom: Here honey, talk to your father.
Pidge's Dad: Did you turn the heat down?
Pidge: Dad, death is coming!
Pidge's Dad: Keep the thermostat under 70, and take care of your grandfather.
{He hangs up.}

[Pidge's House]
Death: Mrrrr!
{Death continues to bang on the door.}
Pidge: Damn it! You know, I think that if parents would spend less time worrying about what their kids watch on TV, and more time worrying about what's going in in their kid's lives, this world would be a much better place.
Lance: Yeh, I think that parents only get so offended by television because the rely on it as a babysitter, and the sole educator of their kids.
Svenny: Well, what I think, basically, is that...mrmmrmrmm
Pidge: Totally dude.
Lance: Good point man.
Death: Mrrrr!
{Death cuts through the door with his scythe.}
Kids: Ahhhh!
Pidge: Quick, jump through the window.
Hunk: Ehh, eh, ehhhh!
{Svenny pushes Hunk out the window and follows.}
Death: Mrrrr!

[Voltron Park Avenue]
Kids: Ahhhh!
{Death is following the kids on a tricycle.}
Grandpa: Come back here you pompetous son of a pansy!
Kids: Ahhh!
Lance: Don't let him touch you, you die if he touches you.
Grandpa: Come over here you son of a whore.
Zooter: Uhh, oh Rebutt? What color is the wind?
Rebutt: Hmmm, I don't know, why don't you check?
[fart]
[laughter]
Zooter: Oh, you farted.
{Death laughs.}
Rebutt: Ohho God.
{Death is laughing uncontrollably.}
Rebutt: Hey Zooter, you know what my space suit smells like?
Zooter: No Rebutt, why don't you tell me?
Rebutt: Well, it smells like, a dirty fart!
[laughter]
{Death laughs.}
Pidge: Hey look!
[fart]
Zooter: Oh, there's one.
{The kids join Death in watching the show.}
{They are all laughing.}

[In front of Cartoon Central]
Newscaster: Hours have passed, and still the die hard Voltron Park parents are killing themselves in front of the 'Toon Central building, one by one. Worse yet, the stomach flu that seems to be going around is...
Newscaster: wait, wait, I'm getting word that the president of the network is going to make a statement.
{The door to 'Toon Central opens.}
{The president emerges wearing a gasmask.}
Townsman: Wait, wait.
John Warsog: Ladies and gentlemen, your nazi-esque tactics of trying to stink us out with your rancid feces ... has worked.
{Shot of a large pile of crap lying in front of the two porta-potties.}
John Warsog: Therefore, today we will be officially taking 'Rebutt & Zooter' off the network and replacing it with reruns of "Haggar: The Third Dimension, starring Haggar.
{The crowd cheers.}
John Warsog: Now get away from here, and take your diarreha with you!
{The crowd continues to cheer.}
Townsman: Huh, oh no!
Lance's mom: At last, now we can return to normality.

[Television store in downtown Voltron Park]
Rebutt: Hey Zooter?
Zooter: Yes Rebutt?
Rebutt: Is there a penny stuck in my butt?
Zooter: Well I don't know Rebutt, let me check.
Hunk: Uh oh, don't look there Zooter, you're gonna get farted on.
{The TV shows some static.}
TV Announcer: We interrupt this program to bring you loud static.
[Loud Static]
Death: Mrrrrr!
Kids: Ahhh!

[Voltron Park Avenue]
{Death turns and touches Svenny, killing him.}
Lance: Oh my God! They killed Svenny. You Bastard!!!
Pidge: Wow, I guess Death was just coming after Svenny the whole time.
Grandpa: Hey, you were supposed to kill me
Death: Mrrr.
Grandpa: That's not fair, God damn it! My grandpa asked me to kill him and I did it.
{Death points a cold finger up the street.}
{From a misty haze emerges an incredibly haggard looking ghost of a man.}
Pidge: Whoa!
Great-Grandpa: Billllyyyy
Grandpa: Grandpa?
Great-Grandpa: That's right Billy.
Grandpa: My name's not Billy, grandpa. And what's wrong with you? Why do you look all haggard?
Great-Grandpa: I asked you to kill me Billy, but I was wrong. And now I'm forced to spend eternity in limbo.
Grandpa: Limbo?
Great-Grandpa: I was wrong to put you in that position Billy, just like you're wrong to put Little Billy in it now. You're so obsessed with ending your life, you're not thinking about what you're doing to his.You must wait to die of natural causes.
Grandpa: But I've been waiting for 25 years.
Great-Grandpa: Let nature run its course, or else end up in limbo. Natural causes Billy, natural causes....
Death, great-grandpa and Svenny's ghost fade away into the mist.
Pidge: Come on you guys, let's go home.
{A space mouse comes up and takes Svenny's corpse away.}

[Pidge's House]
Lance's mom: Here they are!
Pidge's Dad: Well, we did it son, we fought a battle for your well being, and won.
Pidge: What do you mean?
Pidge's Mom: We got 'Rebutt & Zooter' taken off the air.
Hunk: You son of a bitch, your mom sucks!
Lance's mom: But look what they put on.
{Pidge's mom turns on the TV.}
TV Announcer: And now back to "Haggar: The Third Dimension"
Hunk: Nooo! God, Noooo!
Haggar: You are the one behind all these shenanigans.
Dude: Yeh, well you're the stupid ho that started it.
Lance's mom: What did he say?
Haggar: Up yours, buttmunch.
Lance's mom: What what what!!!
Lance's mom: Come on everybody, back to Geneva!
Lance: Hey Pidge, now that 'Rebutt & Zooter' has been taken off the air, what are we going to do for entertainment?
Pidge: I don't know. We, we could start breathing gas fumes.
Hunk: My uncle says that smoking crack is kinda coool.
Lance: Hey, why don't we watch some of those porno movie thingies?
Pidge: Cool!
Hunk: Yeh!
{Grandpa wheels up wearing a touristy shirt, carrying a Planet Doom brochure.}
Pidge: What are you doing grandpa?
Grandpa: I'm planning a trip to Planet Doom. Did you know that over 400 people are eaten naturally by 3 towed serpents of death on Planet Doom every year?
Pidge: That's my silly grandpa.
[laughter]
{Lance farts}
[laughter]