Dating Season
13 April 1999; tweaks 15 May 1999
by HKMiller
A Ranma 1/2 - Warner Bros. fusion spamfic
- - - - - - - - - -
"That wascally Wanma!" Elmer Kuno, a bald boy with a
very large round head, dressed in hakama and carrying a
bokken, strides determinedly through a high school playing
field. "I shall fwee my loves fwom his foul embwace!"
Ranma, in boy form, walks up behind Kuno, who is
looking around bewilderedly. Ranma gnaws on the end
of one of his school pencils. "Nyaahhh, what's up, sempai?"
Kuno continues to peer around, shading his eyes with his
hand as he speaks. "I'm hunting Wanma."
"And whatcha gonna do when you catch Ranma?"
"I will cwush him and fwee the pig-tailed girl and Akane
Tendo! Then the thwee of us will go on a date!"
*SPLASH* Akane, holding a now-empty bucket, smirks
at girl-Ranma. "Why, look! If it isn't the pig-tailed
girl now! Sempai, I think it's her turn for a date."
Akane sticks her tongue out at Ranma, then whispers
"Pervert."
As Kuno turns, bouquet of red roses in hand, Ranma bats
her eyes at him. "Sempai! It's really not my turn.
It's Akane's turn, I'm sure!" Ranma hisses to Akane
under her breath, "you are so uncute," as he deftly
turns the bouquet to point in Akane's direction.
Akane stomps forward. "Pervert!" She shoves the bouquet
back to point at Ranma.
"Uncute!" Ranma points the bouquet back at Akane.
"Pervert!" Akane reciprocates, then plants her fists
on her hips.
"Pervert!" Ranma points the bouquet half-way towards
Akane, then returns it so that it points to herself.
"Uncute! Date the uncute one!" Akane shouts in
triumph, grabbing the bouquet.
Accordingly, Elmer Kuno links arms with Akane, a
silly smile appearing on his face, and starts to
escort Akane off the field.
Akane, furious, punts Kuno into the sunset and storms
back over to Ranma, who is standing there smirking
and chewing on her pencil.
"Let's try that again..." Akane gets out between
gritted teeth.
"My wuvs! Pwease don't argue! Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh.
Elmer Kuno is man enough for both of you!" Elmer Kuno
embraces both Ranma and Akane.
"AAAGGHH! HENTAI!" Two fists dispatch Kuno to the
horizon.
Ranma nibbles on the end of her pencil as she watches
Elmer Kuno disappear into the sunset. "Nyaahh, why does
he wanna go on a date with an uncute tomboy like Akane,
anyway?"
Akane spits out, "Ranma! Youuu'rree Deth-picable!"
THE END.
Spamfic using characters which fuse characteristics
of some characters copyright Warner Brothers onto
other characters copyright Takahashi Rumiko.
(
geocities.com/tokyo/Dojo) (
geocities.com/tokyo)