Valentine's Day

(Please note: Fushigi Yuugi and characters are the property of Watase

Yuu, Flower Comics, etc. That's my disclaimer. Don't bother suing me,

I don't even own my own computer.)

(I know, it's not Valentine's day, but oh well. I'm early this year.

Minor spoilers here, but I am writing this as if everyone is all alive

and kicking in modern day Tokyo, ok? As usual, there's a tiny bit o'

yaoi stuff here too. BTW - I don't know where Miaka's apartment is

located, so that's why the story is happening in Tokyo, okay?)

*** *** ***

Bishonen no Miko© presents:

Fushigi Yuugi Episode 53! (the lost episode)

Valentine's Day in Fuugi Yuugi Land!

*** *** ***

It was February 14th and all was not well. Tamahome wandered aimlessly

around the streets of Tokyo, peering into shop windows and sighing at

his own stupidity. His mind wandered back in time...

"Happy Valentine's Day Tamahome!" Miaka had said as she handed him a

little box of chocolates tied up with red velvet ribbon.

"Ano... Valentine's Day??" he asked stupidly. Miaka's face fell.

"You forgot?"

*Oh no, Keisuke had warned me about this! Damn!* Tamahome turned very

red and sheepishly tried to apologize, but Miaka inexplicably burst

into tears and ran off, shrieking something about her hunger and the

lack of tasty chocolates.

*And so now I have to find her some chocolates?* thought Tamahome as

he wandered past more shops. But they all seemed to be sold out. He

finally saw a very busy little store that seemed to have some candies

left, so he ran in and yelled, "Excuse me? Do you have any...????"

His voice trailed off as he ran into a tall, familiar figure.

"NAKAGO?!" He looked around nervously. "What are you doing here?"

Nakago smirked and pushed back his blonde hair. "Tamahome, it's

Valentine's Day."

Suddenly a wicked grin split Tamahome's face. "Ah, you forgot too!!"

Nakago turned SD and dramatically put his hand to his forehead. "Soi

kicked me out! Waahhhh!" He grabbed Tamahome and put his head on his

shoulder. Tamahome sweattled.

"Well aren't you going to comfort me?" Nakago asked, turning his head

to look at Tamahome.

"Er, no."

"Hmph. But you know, Tama-chan, you have really beautiful skin..."

Nakago took Tamahome's hand and pressed something in his palm, closing

his fingers around it.

"For you," he said with a quick wink, then he swept out of the store.

Tamahome slowly opened his hand and stared at the little Hershey's

Kiss Nakago had put there.

*Sigh. Now both Miaka and Nakago have given me chocolates. What'll I

do?*

Then someone tapped him on the shoulder. "Tamahome."

"Hmm? Amiboshi?"

The young man smiled at him. "Would you and Miaka be interested in a

little dinner get together tonight?"

"I dunno. She's kinda... mad," he whispered.

Amiboshi frowned. "Tell her Yui is going too, then she'll go! I have

to get going now, see you tonight!"

*** *** ***

The rest of the Suzaku Seishi (minus Hotohori) were gathered in Miaka's

apartment. But Keisuke had to play host, since Miaka had locked

herself in her room and refused to come out. A mysterious package had

just arrived, with nothing marking it other than a tiny card and the

name "Nuriko" scrawled on it.

"From... Ashitare?" Nuriko said in surprise as he read the little card

attached to the box. "Wonder what's in here?"

"Probably a flare," guessed Tasuki, gesturing at the little pink box

in Nuriko's hands.

Keisuke eyed him. "Better not be. My mom's not going to be happy if

you blow up our apartment," he said, gesturing around at his home.

"Maybe he's trying to apologize for killing you, no da," said Chichiri.

"Nuriko, be careful..." piped in Chiriko as Nuriko began to unwrap the

package. Slowly, he pulled off the lid and pushed aside the dark red

tissue paper.

"Let's see... UWWAAHHHH!!!" he screamed, throwing the box down and

scrambling back behind Mitsukake.

"What is it, Nuriko?" asked Tasuki.

"Hea... hear... heart," Nuriko panted.

Tasuki, Chiriko and Chichiri all popped off the sofa to look into the

box. In the middle of the all the frilly wrappings lay a human heart.

"Ewww... gross!" said Tasuki. "What a freak."

"Ne, I think it's actually a good thing." Everyone turned to look at

Chiriko.

"Chiriko..."

The boy smiled. "It's Ashitare, remember? Would you expect any less

from him? The thought was there, but he kinda missed the mark."

"So now I have to repay him? No way! And what would YOU do if

Miboshi decided to 'think' about you?" Chiriko shuddered.

Tasuki grinned, showing his fangs. "So now what do we do with it?" he

asked, gesturing at the box.

No one answered. The silence was overwhelming. Crickets were

chirp... urk! You get the picture.

"So, um, Nuriko, what happened to Hotohori?" Keisuke asked nervously,

glad that he didn't have to explain all of this to his mother.

Nuriko suddenly grinned. "Aheheheh. You'll see." Nuriko's mad

laughter was suddenly interrupted by a knock on the door. Keisuke

opened it to see Amiboshi standing there.

"Ah, Amiboshi. Come on in."

He shook his head. "Thank you, but I don't have time. You're all

invited to a Valentine's Day dinner tonight," he said.

"Is Ashitare going to be there?" Nuriko asked suspiciously.

"Maybe. See you later!" said Amiboshi, and he left.

*** *** ***

Meanwhile in another subplot...

Yui and Suboshi were walking hand in hand through a park. He had

already heaped boxes upon boxes of candies on her, dozens of flowers,

cards, even a necklace and a little stuffed dragon. But then again,

he had to beat out Tetsuya's midnight seranade effort WITHOUT

resorting to tearing the guy's vocal cords out - what else could he do

but woo her with all the commercialism that surrounded Valentine's

Day?

She seemed happy enough, humming her theme song to herself. Suboshi

sweattled and wrung his hands nervously as he tried to decide what he

should say to her next. "Yui-sama... are you tired? Please, sit

down," he said, gesturing at a park bench.

"Um, okay." She sat down and Suboshi sat down too, but on the

opposite end of the bench. A few minutes ticked by slowly, and Suboshi

began to inch over on the seat.

*A little closer, a little closer...* he kept saying to himself. His

hand began to crawl towards Yui's shoulder on it's own accord.

"Suboshi!"

"Yarrgghhh!" Suboshi jumped up, his cheeks flushed. "Aniki, what are

you doing here?" Yui looked up at Amiboshi too.

"Gomen, niichan. Would the two of you please attend my Valentine's

Day dinner tonight?"

"Yeah, sure," Suboshi said quickly, then he gave his brother the LOOK.

Amiboshi blinked, then smiled and said, "I'll see you tonight then."

*** *** ***

Elsewhere, a crowd of screaming girls ran through an alleyway.

"He came this way; I saw him!" one girl yelled.

Another nodded in agreement. "He couldn't have gotten far!" They

looked around, then motioned to the others.

"He's probably over there," said the first girl, and the little herd

ran off.

Hotohori cautiously peered around the corner of the trash can he was

hiding behind. *Whew, they're gone. Well, I do have that effect on

women. But how undignified of me... having to hide behind trash, away

from the adoration of so many ladies! Sigh...*

"When I find out who told them about my trip to the beauty salon,

I'll...! Nu...RIKO!!" He gritted his teeth and clenched his fist as

it dawned on him, a little SD vision of Nuriko prancing through his

mind.

He froze as he heard a few female voices saying, "Excuse me? Young

man, did you see a really stunning guy come through here? He had long

brown hair and he sparkled...?"

"Sorry, but no."

The girls sighed and moved on. Hotohori peeked over the trash can to

see Amiboshi walking towards him, a half smile touching his lips.

"Hotohori-sama, would you come to the Valentine's Day dinner I'm

hosting tonight."

Hotohori tossed his hair over his shoulder. "I am grateful for what

you did. Certainly, you can expect me to grace your dinner party with

my presence."

"Er, yeah. Thank you, Hotohori-sama."

*** *** ***

Back at Yui's home, the Seiryuu Seishi (minus our little cupid -

Amiboshi, Mr. Romeo - Suboshi, and Soi, who's locked herself away in

her room) sat around, bored. Miboshi finally got frustrated and

decided to take Ashitare out for a walk (can you see the headlines in

the tabloids? Little Demon Brat walks pet Wolfman!), leaving Tomo and

Nakago... alone.

Tomo looked back at the door to Soi's room, then, satisfied that she

wasn't going to come out, pulled out his little clam and turned the

room into an imaginary "love hotel."

Nakago just sat there, arms folded, as Tomo dimmed the lights and

leaned closer to him.

"Nakago, forget about her. It is I, Tomo, who has always loved you."

He put his hand on Nakago's knee and cackled.

"Tomo. I hate your laugh. It has annoyed me through the entire

series. And only one man can satisfy me...; and it is not you."

"Eh?" SD Tomo could only choke on his words of love. "Who?" he

managed to croak.

"Tamahome."

By the time Amiboshi got back, Tomo was lying twitching on the ground,

Nakago and Soi had patched things up and were amusing themselves by

whipping Ashitare, and Miboshi was doing interviews for the National

Enquirer.

"So, how did it go?" asked Soi from her perch on Nakago's lap.

His eyes lit up. "I think everyone will be going tonight."

*** *** ***

So the highly anticipated night finally fell, and the various seishi, mikos,

and relatives-of-mikos assembled themselves at the location Amiboshi had

chosen.

"Hey, this isn't a restaurant," said Miaka. "It's a karaoke bar!!" Her

stomach growled. "I'm hungry," she whimpered.

Then Amiboshi stuck his head out the door and grinned. "Hey, everyone came!

Come on in!"

"Where's the food?!" Miaka asked, her twisted face inches away from

Amiboshi's. The young musician recoiled in fear.

"Miaka-san, you're... scary." Amiboshi sighed and said, "I did get some food

though, so don't worry."

Miaka relaxed and her face went back to normal. The seishi stuffed themselves

through the door ("Hey, watch it fang boy!" "Na... Nakago... why are you

touching me?" "Please don't eat me Ashitare, I'm just a little kid!"

"Nakago, how can you put your hands all over Tamahome when I'm right here?!

Wahhhh!!!!" "Yui-sama... I love..." "Tomo, you pervert - Nakago is mine!")

After much arguing, they made their way into a private room, decorated with

golden birds and dragons.

"Food, food..."

Amiboshi smiled and motioned to the table at the side. Drooling, Miaka ran

over and began shoving everything in her mouth.

"Argh! She'll eat everything!" Tamahome, Hotohori, Nuriko, and all the other

Suzakus ran forth, trying to tear the ravenous Miaka off the food. But their

efforts were not enough, and in the end they resigned themselves to starving

for the evening. At least Tomo brought some chocolates (shaped like little

clam shells) and shared them with the Seiryuus, but the Suzakus were forced

to drooling over the empty plates left by Hurricane Miaka. Empty stomachs

plus a lot of sake got everyone up to sing the Fushigi Yuugi opening song,

badly off key. Nuriko made a pass at Hotohori (both of them so drunk they

thought the other was a girl), Tamahome was ignored by Miaka (she ate the

entire evening), Yui beat up Suboshi (just to do it), Tomo and Soi fought over

Nakago (who was looking at Tamahome with misty eyes)... a wonderful time was

had by all. And so one by one, the highly intoxicated seishi passed out,

falling asleep on top of each other. Nuriko was asleep on Hotohori's lap,

Keisuke was passed out on Tamahome, who was drooling on Nakago's chest; Soi

and Tomo had passed out next to each other after arguing the entire time.

The entire room was unconscious, all except Miaka, who was still eating, and

Amiboshi, who was playing the flute.

After she polished off the last plate of food (without gaining a pound,

bleah!), she poked Tamahome in the shoulder until he woke up, then said,"Ne,

Tamahome. Where's my chocolates?"

Tamahome looked at her with bleary eyes. "Uh?"

"Ta... Tamahome no baka!" she yelled, and sent him into orbit with an

uppercut.

"Aiya!!!! Gomen nasai!!!" he yelped as he was sent flying.

"Miaka-san, here." A box was suddenly dropped into Miaka's lap. She looked

up to see Amiboshi.

"Nani?"

"Happy Valentine's Day!" he said, and left the room.

She unwrapped the box and opened it to find a pound of chocolate. The card

inside said, "Ai shiteru, Miaka - from Tamahome." She was so happy that she

didn't notice the card was in Amiboshi's writing.

Miaka's eyes sparkled. She thought, "Tamahome DID remember..." "Tamahome, I

love you!" she yelled to the room.

*** *** ***

On top of the roof, Amiboshi watched as Tamahome orbited the moon. He

raised his flute to his lips, paused, smiled, and said to himself, "Well, it

was the least I could do..."

*** *** ***

THE END!!

Author's notes: This was just a silly story making fun of all the

relationships in the story. Please don't send me hate mail about

Nakago's sexual preferences - I love the guy, remember?

HEY! (Blatent plug) If you have a webpage showing anyone evil (any Seiryuu

people count) in a good light, please join my new webring: The Wickedly Cool

Evil Ring of Anime. It's at:

"http://www.oocities.org/Tokyo/Flats/4814/revil.html"

If anyone wants to reach me, come to my Shrine of Bishonen at:

http://www.aestheticism.com/visitors/Miko/

or you can e-mail me at:

bishonennomiko@rocketmail.com

Bishonen no Miko, August 4, 1997