Memories: The Phoenix's Fire
-----------------------------
PartI
Two separate, distinct personalities, not separate at all, but inextricably bound,
soul and body and mind, to each other, how did we get so far apart so fast?
-Judith Guest
Ordinary People
Some enchanted evening
You may see a stranger,
You may see a stranger
Across a crowded room
And somehow you know
You know even then
That somewhere you'll see her again and again.
Some enchanted evening
Someone may be laughing
You may hear her laughing
Across a crowded room
And night after night
As strange as it seems
The sound of her laughter
Will sing in your dreams
Fools give you reasons,
Wise men never try.
Some enchanted evening
When you find your true love,
When you feel her call you
Across a crowded room,
Then fly to her side
And make her your own,
Or all through your life you may dream all alone.
-Oscar Hammerstein II
Some Enchanted Evening
(From "South Pacific")
She was admist the downpour of pedals on top of the winded
hilltop, on the very roof of an ancient temple, while the breeze pulled
at her hair. Silently she reached out a hand and captured a single,
floating petal from where she sat; she smiled as she opened her palm.
Reality can be so beautiful, she thought, strange how it could be so
cruel as well. She turned away from the flurry, leaping from the
rooftop and walked down the hill, gently picking her way down to the
bottom, and the flurries followed her but she did not heed them as she
had before, and continued her walk through the gardens. She silently
reached a tree trunk and leaned against it, staring down the rows of
trees, one after the other. The petals settled onto her hair,
intertwining with the deep fiery red, trailing past her waist.
Sometimes I wonder what it is like to be in love, to have someone
to always be there for me. She sighed, but that was not to come, not
for her, a priestess, a princess, and most importantly, a senshi.
Closing her eyes, she could only dream of what is like to be held in
the arms of another, in the arms of a lover who would love her with his
soul.
She was the fire senshi; her hair was a dark as the night sky,
tinted purple in the right light. She was sometimes called rash,
impatient, and beautiful, like the sacred flames, forever roaring to
the pulse of life, a force that is both cold and uncaring, as it is
burning and hypnotic. She opened her palm and a soft flame erupted,
floating in midair, feeding on nothing and everything. She smiled, she
never knew that she could've gotten this powerful, none of them did,
but its what you can expect after a few thousand years of training, she
grinned wearily, a few thousand years by myself already? She thought,
the flame wavered in the breeze, responding to its master's will, as
she stared at it, a face appeared, staring back at her, a memory in the
back of her mind, where she had shoved it, closing her palm she killed
the flame and the memory it held within its warmth, its ignorance. I
am a fool, she thought, and turned back to staring into the horizon, a
fool forever waiting for something that I had already lost a long time
ago.
Silver Millennium, temple of Mars...
It's so peaceful here, she thought and smiled thankful for the
solitude she found. The castle was in an uproar, preparing for a
coming ball, her birthday really, and everyone was fussing over her.
She usually loved the attention, but this time, she wanted to be left
to solitude, and think, to clear her head of all the noises and think
of what is to come, of a destiny that she did not choose, but was
forced to accept. Am I scared? She questioned herself, for she was
hardly ever scared. Sitting in front of the sacred flames of Mars, her
God, she asked for guidance and comfort, something she knew that no one
else could give her but the flames. Yes. The fire replied. I'm
scared? She asked again, but how is it possible? I'm never scared, of
anything! Child, the flames whispered to her soul, you are but a
child, so young, you are allowed to have weaknesses child, do not fear
your weaknesses. She felt so warm in its embrace. Child, you long for
comfort and love that I cannot give you, I am only a flame, built by
other flames, I die and yet I will always live, you long for the touch
and the love of a man, do you not child? She trembled and shook her
head in defiance. No, I need no man! Her mind screamed. The flames
seemed to chuckle, but not mockingly and not at her. Child, to long
for love is nothing to be ashamed of, it is what your kind and many
others like you will always long for, do not think you are immune, it
is cowardly to hide such a need behind facets of duty and fear. She
trembled still, no, I need no man; I need no one. The flames shook,
child, I can see you are still young, too young to understand but
remember my words child, wisdom to be kept is wisdom done.
Tell me what is to come. She whispered to the flames, why do you
speak to me so? A face appeared, a battle that was to be fought
flashed before her vision, and pain, so much pain! Her soul screamed
out, she collapsed, gasping she looked into the flames. Child, there
will come a time when you will regret this, but remember my words
child, remember and you will learn, you will understand someday why it
has to be this way. The voice faded, her head cleared, but the face,
it stayed, it stayed with her through the many lifetimes to come.
Crystal Tokyo, Rei's room...
She stood upon the balcony welcoming the sweet breath of
fragranced air from the gardens below, roses, she thought and smiled.
So many memories of battles with Mamoru and Usagi, she remembered a
time when she tried to fight for the leadership of the team, what a
fool I was, she thought. I should've known, reaching out a hand, she
caught a drifting petal, the petal of a cherry blossom; she held it and
then gently blew it back to the embrace of the breeze that drifted by.
Where are you? She asked silently, as a face flashed before her, the
flames would not tell me where you are, why? She wrapped her arms
around herself, remembering the first hundred years, Yuichiro, a sad
smile appeared; I guess I do miss you after all. There were others of
course, Mamoru was one of them once, but she now saw him only as she
would an older brother, no longer the man of her dreams, for he was the
man of another's dreams, he no longer belonged to her and all of her
dreams. She tugged a strand of dark tress behind her ear, and
remembered.
...Can I truly forgive myself?
Fire River Temple, 1998...
"Yuichiro! Stop lazing around and get to work!" She said, as
she loomed over him and aimed at his nose with her broom.
Even though he was at least a head taller than her he seemed to
shrink beneath her fierce gaze. "Go-Gomen, Rei-chan!" He sputtered and
waved his hands in front of him, desperately trying to calm her down so
he didn't have to endure anymore of her wrath, as he slowly tried to
back away.
"Stop sputtering nonsense and get to work!" She yelled, and with
that turned and went back to sweeping the steps, glaring at him from
over her shoulder to make sure he was no longer sitting down to take a
rest, and grumbling the whole time. He in turn let out a sigh of
relief and quickly went back to wiping the floorboards, scrubbing he
was interrupted by a squeal, and then later, a loud crash. He winced,
Usagi was here, and that meant the rest of the girls were as well, now
his workload just doubled, since Rei would have to entertain her
friends and Grandpa was not going to indulge him with any break.
"Usagi-chan, you are such a klutz!" He overheard Rei yell over the
laughter as Usagi wobbled a little, after picking herself up from the
ground.
"Why are you always so mean, Rei-chan?" She wailed.
"Daijobu, Usagi?" He heard the gentle concern in the voice of
the blue-haired genius, sighing he wondered why Rei couldn't be more
like the other girl, then grinned as he thought that he really wouldn't
have Rei any other way.
"Of course odango-atama's alright, she survived worse." Rei
sighed, as Usagi shot her a glare and stuck out her tongue.
"Yareyare..." Everyone sighed, while Ami sadly shook her head.
Oh brother, Yuichiro thought, here it goes, his thoughts echoed
that of many other Senshi as Rei and Usagi went back and forth like
that for a minute or two, "It amazes me that the fate of the world rest
in the hands of those two." Artemis sighed on top of Minako's
shoulder, only Yuichiro was to far away to hear the disheartened
comment of the white cat.
"What are you complaining about?" Luna grumbled as she took a
swap at the other cat, "You at least get to live with Minako-chan!"
Luna said sarcastically from Ami's shoulder, while the three scouts
laughed nervously at this.
"Guys, hey cut it out!" Makoto cut in, and everyone looked to
her gratefully, except Rei and Usagi, both now looking startled and
puzzled all at once. "Look we're here for a senshi meeting remember?
Could we hurry this up a bit?" Makoto was almost as impatient as Rei,
almost, though not quite, but she was bigger, and she was imposing when
she wants to be.
"Hai, hai!" Minako agreed too enthusiastically, trying to
lighten the mood, while Artemis and Luna sighed; there was no help for
these girls they thought. "It's senshi meeting time!" All the senshi,
excluding Minako, toppled over.
"Minako-chan, I swear, you become more like Usagi everyday." Rei
said aggravated by the sight of both Usagi and Minako pigging out in
front of her.
"Rei-chan, why are you so mean to me?" Minako asked, eyes
watering.
"Yareyare." Artemis said tiredly.
"Why are you always picking on me Rei-chan?" Usagi joined in,
her own eyes watering as she leaned over the table, losing her balance
though, since her hands were still on her lap her chin connected with
the table with a crash, sending trays flying all over the place.
"Usagi!" They cried, and not one of them was that of concern.
"Rei-chan?" Yuichiro timidly called to her after her friends'
departure.
"Hai Yui-chan?" She asked tiredly, after cleaning all of the
mess that Usagi had made.
"Rei-chan...I was wondering if..." He trailed off, unsure if he had
the courage to say what he wanted to say next.
"If?" She asked curiously.
"If you want me to help you with that cleaning, you know you look
real tired right now Rei-chan and you have school tomorrow." He
hurriedly said, hoping that she wouldn't detect that he had meant to
say something else.
"Domo arigato Yui-chan." She smiled softly, and for once she let
her barrier down, allowing him to see the girl that he knew he would do
anything for. "Gomen nasai!" She said sheepishly after a stretch of
silence.
"For what Rei-chan?" He laughed nervously.
"For yelling at you before, you really helped us out a lot in the
last few years, and I keep forgetting to thank you for all that you
have done for us." She smiled and walked up to him, while he nervously
pondered if he was dreaming or not. "Domo arigato Yui-chan! For
everything." She leaned over and pecked him on one cheek before
pulling back as she smiled at him happily.
"Is this a dream Rei-chan?" He asked solemnly.
"A dream? Whatever for?" She asked as she looked up at him
puzzled, but then her eyes flashed. "Baka! Are you implying I can't
ever be nice in real life?" She took the nearest tray and whacked him
on the head, almost to the point of unconsciousness. "Hmf!" She said
dropping the tray on his head, and whirled around before he could
recover. "And you can clean up the mess!" And with that she was gone,
leaving Yuichiro still dazed on the floor.
Silver Millennium, the Palace of Fire...
The music was beautiful, the lights were dazzling, the flowers'
fragrance was in the air, and she...was miserable. I don't know why, but
I always feel so lonely at balls like this, sighing, she looked down at
her perfectly manicured hands and frowned, trying to ignore the stares
she got from men and women alike, as well as her surroundings. She
always knew she was beautiful, her parents, her teachers, the boys that
she has met, none of them would let her forget, strangers usually
gawked at her even, and she once liked all the attention she got from
it, but now even that made her feel hollow. Why can't they see there's
more to me than my looks, and my crown, and my perfectly manicured
hands? She sulked, suddenly raising her head as she sensed a presence,
strange, she thought, this one feels foreign. She quietly slid away
from the dancing and laughing crowd in the ballroom and went searching
into the gardens, looking around puzzled, she pondered what it was that
she sensed. A shadow seemed to merge into the side of a tree, she
gasped and approached, half angry and half annoyed, only when she got
there, there was no one there. Blinking in surprise, she reached out
with her mind, and found that the entity had moved into the ballroom,
startled, she quickly turned and raced towards where she had escaped,
hastening for a second on whether to return to the fancy prison, but
her curiosity got the best of her.
She stepped in gracefully, head raised high, and with a flip of
her long rose colored hair, she advanced towards the staircases, many
men admired her as she passed them by, leaving behind a scent of warm
summer nights in fields of flowers. She paid them no heed, but she
needed to reach the staircase to truly locate this mysterious presence.
Though, deep within the shadows that she passed, she missed its
occupant who uncertainly reached out a hand towards her as she passed
by, but quickly drew it back, she never knew that clear blue eyes, like
the hottest blue flames, shined through the darkness like flickers, was
watching her from near and afar. But before she got there strong arms
stopped her, "Rei-chan!" A voice said, surprised and pleased at the
same time.
"What are you doing here Yui-chan?" She gasped in surprise at
the young man before her, who at the time had two maidens clinging to
his arms and glaring at her enviously, but she ignored them as well.
"I thought you were helping out at the temple!"
"And miss my favorite girl's last birthday on Mars?" She winced,
while the other girls started to protest, but he silenced them with a
charming grin. "We'll miss you Rei-chan, you know we will." He gently
caressed her cheek and his eyes seemed sparkle, and for a moment he
appeared to have wanted to say something to her, but he didn't, and
they stood there in silence just staring at each other, trying to
figure out what to say.
"Princess Rei, you are needed to be by the King and Queen." A
warm voice came from behind her, one of her guardians she realized,
gently setting a hand on her shoulder and snapping her gaze away from
Yuichiro.
"Gomen Deimos-san, I hope I will see you later Yui-chan." Rei
turned and left, while Yuichiro watched sadly, following her with his
eyes, as did the shadow.
"Gomen nasai Rei-chan, goodbye." He turned and smiled at the
ladies and excused himself, stepping into the gardens he took a breath
of fresh air.
"Komban wa, Yuichiro." A voice rose from the shadows, startled,
he quickly turned around.
"Who's there?" He asked, eyes snapping, as he narrowed them.
"I mean you no harm." The voice came patiently, "Nor the
Princess that you are in love with." He gasped in surprise, no one
knew that, he had told no one, not even Rei-chan herself with all her
power in controlling the fire. "I am simply here to ask you, why she is
so sad." Yuichiro stared at the shadows around him, and shook his head
in disbelief.
"Yuichiro-san!" A voice called out, and he yelped as he felt a
hand on his shoulders, the woman before him frowned. "Gomen Yuichiro-
san, but what has gotten you so spooked?"
"Phobos-san! What are you doing here?" He asked, still a little
shaken.
She frowned, "Yuichiro-san, everyone is gathering for the event
of the Princess birthday, do you not wish to be there? I'm sure her
highness would be pleased if you were there, being you are one of her
closest friends." Her eyes lightened. "I had known you to speak with
fires Yuichiro-san, but not shadows as well!" Laughingly, she waved
him to follow her to the castle, glancing behind silently, he quickly
ran to join the guardian of his Princess. Whose face does that voice
belong to? He asked himself silently. And why does this voice seem to
want to know what was on my Princess's heart? His fists clenched, if
this voice's owner dare to hurt Rei..."I mean you no harm. Nor the
Princess that you are in love with." How did it know? How did it know
so much? Even as he watched her smiling in the glow of candles and
laughter, her crimson hair shining like flames admist darkness, he
pondered what it had meant when it had asked him, "Why is she so sad?"
I don't know, was all he could answer, I don't know.
The shadow sighed, it found nothing of importance on this foolish
mission that the High Prince had sent him to do, nothing. No, not
nothing, he found her. Sometimes, in the dark, it thought it would
catch glimpses of a face, smiling at it with so much love that it hurt,
changing before it, flashes that made no sense, but it was content with
these flashes nonetheless. She seems so familiar, it thought, yet why
does she seem so sad? It had wanted to go to her, it had reached out
for her, but she was too far for it to reach, too far, perhaps some
other life we will meet again. It thought, despair already upon its
heart as it turned away, for a second the light held it, and it heard a
gasp within its mind, turning it met red eyes, shining and burning like
a flame to it, startled, it gaped at her, but quickly stepped back to
the safety of the shadows. Gomen nasai...my Rei-chan, it thought as it
faded from the planet and headed its home.
He is-he was here! Oh, why did the Gods have to send me an
intruder that looks too innocent to be one, and too handsome for his
own good? His eyes were so sad, as if reflecting my soul, I can almost
feel his touch, the touch of his eyes upon my skin. Oh the Gods, what
am I thinking of? Am I so crazed and so depressed to fall for such a
mystery, and probably one of my own creation? But his presence, it was
like the one I felt, or did I only imagined it, for he is no longer
there? His face, it was half hidden in shadows, but I am sure it is
the one I had saw, it was the betrayer's face in the fire, but why do I
feel so? She closed her eyes and took a breath while she bowed,
frowning slightly, so slightly that no one noticed, but him, the man of
the shadows saw it before he had disappeared, and the other, her life
long friend, Yuichiro. Why are you so sad? They both questioned in
union, why are you so sad...my Rei-chan?
Present, The streets of Crystal Tokyo...
The dark lights played across the shadows, dancing, merging till
one is no longer sure which was truly the light and the other the
darkness. Shadows shifting, he frowned at the light, but it seemed
that he did not fit the shadows so well either, though he was apart of
it, joining with it. He remembered nothing but darkness and coldness,
and an over powering sense of evil, of hate, and then it all resided,
till he was here, washed up upon the shores of Crystal Tokyo, or from
what he had heard of the conversations of tourists. He didn't know
where he was really, one moment he was in the Silver Millennium,
battling youma armies and trying to bury himself into his work so he
didn't have to think about...
Her...
Her name...he had forgotten it, but her face flashed before his
eyes. Perfect rouge eyes, and rose colored hair, and she smelled
always of cherry blossoms and warm summer air...why could he not recall
her name? Who was she, this beautiful woman who haunted his dreams and
every waking moments? Eyes always flashing with mixed feelings at him
as if ready to tear him apart with the conflicts within them...
Sadness, they were always so sad. Why are you always so sad? He
wondered.
Why will the fire not answer him? It has always answered, but
now it lay silent, dormant within him, as if waiting to be roused from
its deep sleep, a sleeping dragon waiting for its mate to return.
He was not even sure were he was, just that the vague memories of
a place that was here yet how did he arrive here, nothing made sense
and he was so lost!
"Ah!" He said in surprise as he felt something hit the back of
his head, smashing onto the pavement he saw stars. "What..." Hands felt
his jacket, his pockets, and then something screamed inside of him,
grabbing the other shadow, he flung it into a wall. It screamed in
pain as its body was slammed against the stone and steel. "Thief, why
I'll tear-"
Another figure came, and then another, he was surrounded, and he
heard chains rattling. "Stop right there!" A figure emerged from the
opposite rooftop. "I thought that when Serenity had created Crystal
Tokyo that you people would learn!" The form was slender, long hair
waving in the wind as it jumped down and the lights hit one side of its
face.
They all gasped in surprise, it was a woman, a very beautiful
woman, even with half of her face hidden. Her slender form was
outlined by lights, her blue jeans hugging her long legs and a red tank
top showed off her curves, the leader only grinned. "This is a
surprise." He began, "But I guess this is our lucky night boys!" They
started to advance on her, he looked bewilderedly at them, unsure what
to do, as the other man took this to his advantage and kneed him in the
stomach, and punched him away, and his advisory then turned and joined
his buddies.
The woman stayed cool and calm and looked at them as if they were
fools. Was she crazy? He thought, as he ran and quickly jumped in
front of her, growling, a protective instinct taking over him that he
had not known to exist. "Stay away from her!" The gang only laughed
at him, but he felt a hand gently resting on his shoulder.
"I can take care of myself." She said her vehemence startled him
as she roughly pushed him aside, startling him more at her strength.
She was so small! "I'm warning you boys, I can take out your gang
without touching you, and I advice you to leave now, or the punishment
would be greater than you care to pay for."
They laughed again, calling her feisty and how they'd loved to
have her for the night, she only shrugged, but there was anger in that
shrug.
"I warned you, something I never used to do." They mockingly
acted like they were scared. "I am the head of security for Crystal
Tokyo and for breaking the peace of this city in which I protect, I
will punish you!" She said and with a flick of her hand, flames like
waves rolled from her fingers, creating a phoenix screeching as it
approached her targets, but only circling them and setting them into a
fiery cage as they returned the scream in surprise and fear. "You're
lucky, a few thousand years ago I would've just roasted you, but I'll
let the police handle this." She grinned, her face in full view now,
her hair seemed almost like a red rose in colored, her eyes burning
with a fire of their own as she pulled out a small communicator.
"Mako-chan, I got another case sixty-four, call one of the Lieutenants
over to clean up the mess." She looked disgustedly over at the group
that huddled together in fear. "They were so easy I could've done it
in my sleep!"
Laughter was heard over the little round device. "Rei-chan,
you'll never change!" Another female voice was heard. "They'll be
there in a minute or two."
"Where's Ami-chan? I need her to write up another report and
send these bastards out of here." Rei said impatiently, even as he
gawked at her, it was the women in his dreams, only her hair now seemed
darker, black with purple highlights, and deeper colored eyes, but he
was sure it was her, they were both very beautiful, but eyes seemed
older even if her language was somewhat vulgar, he thought with a
blush.
"Gomen Rei-chan, Ami-chan's out with Zoi-chan for the night..."
A sly grin appeared on Rei's face. "So you'll have to do the paper
work yourself. And watch your mouth Rei, you've been on the streets
too long!"
"Ah, who cares?" Rei said uncaringly, "So Ami-chan's out with
Zoisite, huh?"
"Rei-chan, don't even think about it! Remember what happened the
last time we tried to spy on them? We nearly broke the two of them up
and Ami-chan refused to speak to us for a week after that!"
"Oh really Mako-chan? You weren't exactly complain at the time."
Rei said smugly. "Anyway, bring down those cops, I don't have all day
you know?" Makoto sighed on the other end, muttering, while Rei closed
the communicator. "Oh!" She said surprised as she finally realized
his existence. "Gomen, they were bullying you weren't they?" Her
expression changed from total girlishness to a pensive look that
startled him so completely that he forgot how to speak for a moment.
"Oh, don't worry about your ego, I rescued bigger studs then you, and
they don't always complain, since it's a beautiful woman who's doing
it." She said arrogantly, but then startled him again as she stretched
out a hand, smiling sweetly and looking totally innocent. "My name is
Hino Rei, what's your name?"
"Gomen nasai Rei-san." And with that he quickly turned to the
shadows and disappeared before she could reach out and stop him,
leaving her to stare at the place that he's been.
"No...it can't be!" She whispered and stepped back to lean against
the wall, eyes watering, threatening to spill forward. "Jade-chan?"
But there was no answer, only the roaring fires and the coming sounds
of police cars, the man of the shadows was gone, just like that in a
dream, a dream of a past thousands of years ago.
"Hino-san, you can lower the fire now." Snapping her from her
thoughts of the past, she quickly nodded and with a wave of her hand it
dissipated, as the men were arrested and taken away. She dazedly went
through the routine of doing paper work and signing releases, as well
as putting a handle on the station. Though the memory of the face in
the fire did not leave her, it was as fresh as the first day she saw
him and as clear as the last day she fought him.
"Jade-chan? Can it be?" She wondered, as the clouds in the sky
begin to roll in, making the night even darker, and the rain begins to
fall.
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