Taishakuten Wants His Dinner-Rg Veda Fanfic. Rated G, no sex or violence.

Take the Taishakuten Evilness Test- Are you as evil as Taishakuten? Find out. Rifle Range Kill as many Taishakutens as you can! Talk to Taishakuten!

What Tai thinks of you and some scary ideas-Interactive fun. Rated G, no sex or violence.

The Top Ten Ways to Get Taishakuten to Kill You

10.) Be sickly yet deeply loved by your closest relative.

9.) Be the said relative trying to avenge your loved one's death.

8.) Be loved by one of his most loyal men.

7.) Get in his way.

6.) Breathe.

5.) Be beautiful.

4.) Have golden eyes.

3.) Have pointed ears.

2.) Be the object of his affection.

1.) Be edible.

Disgustingly Dreadful Taishakuten Jokes

Warning: The following jokes are astoundingly awful. Do not read this if you cannot stand corny Taishakuten jokes.

Here it goes:

1.) How many Taishakutens does it take to change a light bulb?
Answer: Shut up or he'll kill you.

2.) What's tall, well-built and cute?
Answers:
1. Lantis (from Magic Knight Rayearth)
2. Tokyo Tower
3. Taishakuten in his dreams

3.) Ashura-ou and Taishakuten are in a room. Outside are Bishamonten and Hanranya.
Bishamonten: Listen to that. I wonder why Ashura-ou is laughing.
Hanranya: Let's look through the keyhole.
They do so.
Bishamonten: I knew it had to be something like that.
Hanranya: Ashura-ou is reading a book.

4.) A man is drinking heavily and crying. His friend sees him and asks him why.
"Taishakuten slipped poison in my drink."
The friend is shocked. "Are you dying?"
"When I told him my clan's military secrets he gave me these pills. I have to drink one everyday to stay alive."
"Well, that's not too bad."
"He only gave me three."

5.) Shashi: What are you doing?
Ashura-ou: I'm counting my fingers.
Shashi: Why?
Ashura-ou: I shook hands with Taishakuten.

What people say about Taishakuten:

Kurara-ou: I want to kill him and avenge my sister's death.

Souma: He had my clan exterminated because of a rumor. Nothing can excuse such behavior.

Kendappa-ou: *shrugs* He's strong.

Ten-ou: I was never close to him.

Shashi: He never would have succeeded without my help.

Kuyo: I'd rather die than serve him.

Gigei: Taishakuten? He has no appreciation for art.

Cook: Skin, debone, cut into strips, then feed to the dogs.

Dogs: No, we don't want any.