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	==Pokemon HAHAHAHAHA!==
	==By A-kun==
	==Episode 2: The Deal!==

	As they entered Viridian city, both heard a speech being broadcasted, but couldn't make out what the person was saying because it was being garbled by static.  Misty glanced over at a nearby police box, which had a pair of speakers.  It seemed to be the source of the speech, since there were no other speakers in view.  They began walking past when a police woman stepped out.
	"Hold it." the officer declared.
	"Huh?" Ash asked, turning to look at her.
	"I assume that, since you have pokemon, that you two have a license?" the officer asked, pointing to Pikachu and Pidgey.
	Ash pulled out his Pokedex and showed it to the officer.
	"Okay, let's see.  Ash Catch'em...blah, blah, blah...... AH!  Okay, you're in the clear." The officer said, before looking at Misty, "What about you?"
	Misty pulled something out of her pocket and showed it briefly to the officer.
	"Oh.  Okay." the officer said, before adding, "I want you two to be extra careful, okay?  There have been a rash of pokemon thefts recently.  The thieves call themselves 'Team Rocket' and we have reason to believe that they're heading this way." the officer declared.
	"Right.  Thanks, ma'am!" Ash said, as they began on their way once again.
	"Pokemon thieves?  That's weird." Misty said.
	"Yeah, but not everyone is going to play according to the rulebook." Ash replied, before glancing at his Pidgey and Pikachu.
	"You two better be careful, okay?" Ash asked.
	"Pika." Pikachu answered, nodding.
	"Wark!" Pidgey added.
	"Hey, have you given any thoughts to naming your pokemon?" Misty asked.
	"Naming?" Ash asked.
	"Well, it's rather stupid to be calling them by what they are." Misty said.
	"Hmmm, you're right.  I better think of some names." Ash said.
	They continued on as Ash tried to think of some names.

	When they arrived at the Pokemon Center, Ash found himself astounded.  There had never been a building as large as the Center in his home town, unless you counted the school, which Ash didn't.
	"Are you sure you want to go in?  They might not like being annoyed by people who actually have nothing to do." Misty said.
	"I do too have something to do in here.  Pidgey and Pikachu need a check-up every two months and I don't want my pokemon passing out or fainting because of a silly flu that could have been avoided." Ash answered.
	"Now that you mention it, I guess I should have my pokemon checked too." Misty said.
	Pikachu and Pidgey hopped off of Misty's bike and landed on Ash's shoulders as Misty put the bike in a bike corral and locked it into place.  They all entered the hospital.
	"Greetings, what may I help you with?" the nurse asked.
	"Well, I'd like my pokemon to have a check-up to make sure they're okay." Ash explained.
	"Well, this is a first.  Usually stupid trainers work their pokemon into exhuastion, then they're stunned when their pokemon faint or start disrespecting them." the nurse said, standing up.
	"I'd like to give my pokemon a check-up too." Misty said, pulling out about sixteen pokeballs.
	Ash looked at the pokeballs with envy.  Even if Ash had kept Pikachu's original pokeball, he only had two filled.  Pikachu and Pidgey obediently followed the nurse as she took Misty's pokeballs and entered a special exam room.
	"I oughta call home and tell mom that I'm fine." Ash said, heading over to the phones.
	"'kay.  I'll go....um......... read..." Misty said, looking at the magazines which, as the Law of Doctor Offices declared, had magazines so old that of one of the newest magazine had the highlight was "Man's first landing on the moon!".  One of the older ones read, "The AUTOMOBILE!  A revolutionary new concept!", "Underwear! Not just for Royalty any more!", "Toothpaste! Space poop or Miracle food of the gods?", "Catholicism! Just a summer fad or an excuse for orgies?" and "The lightbulb!  What will those crazy scientists think of next?!".  The oldest one read, "Ye Olde Pornography." and the date read May 15th, 1382.  Misty decided to look at the huge picture that was behind the desk, depicting four pokemon, a Phoenix, a Dragon, a Tiger and a Turtle.
	Ash dialed his hometown's name and his address (the latest concept in both keeping track of where someone lived and keeping people straight).  It took about six rings, but his mom finally answered.  Wearing a mud mask.
	"GYAAAAAAAAH!" Ash yelled, screaming bloody murder as he fell backwards out of the chair.
	"Ash!  What's wro-" Misty began, before seeing Lucrecia still wearing her mud mask, "YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!"
	Misty leapt over the counter of the desk and hid.  When Ash came to his senses, he sat up to see his mom had, thankfully, cleaned off the mask.
	"Sorry about that, Ash.  Now I know why Vincent told me to clean it off before answering the phone.  Anyway, how are you?  I take it that you're in Viridian City." Lucrecia said.
	"Yep.  I'm giving Pikachu a check-up and I caught a Pidgey, which is also getting a check-up." Ash told her.
	"That's great, honey!  I'm so glad you're off to such a great start.  Now, just keep it up and you'll be a Pokemon Master!  I'm going to call everyone!" Lucrecia said.
	"Bye mom!" Ash managed to say before his mom hung up and no doubt began calling other people in the community.
	Ash turned to see Misty peeking her head over the counter.
	"You okay?" Ash asked.
	"Yeah, just a tad frightened." Misty said, standing up.
	"Well, mom was always into fads.  Mud-masks just happen to be the longest lasting one." Ash said.
	"And you're not used to seeing her in one?" Misty asked.
	"Gimme a break.  I'm usually in bed by the time she puts one on." Ash answered.
	Suddenly, a phone began ringing behind the desk.  Misty looked at it, then back down the corridor that the nurse had headed down.
	"Better get it.  She'll be a while." Ash commented, walking over to the desk.  Misty looked at the control panel and hit a button.  Suddenly, one of the pictures on the wall changed into a person.  They were apparently looking at something else because all Ash could see was the back of the person's head.
	"Uh, this is Ash.  How can I help you?" Ash asked, awkwardly.
	"Ash, this is Professor Oak.  Didn't you recognize me?" the person asked.
	"I do sorta recognize the back of your head..." Ash commented.
	"Huh?  Blasted thing!  I had the wrong camera on.  One moment." Professor Oak said.
	Suddenly, the image changed and Professor Oak's face appeared on the screen.
	"So, Ash, your mother told me that you arrived in Viridian City without any problems.  Is there anything wrong with your pokemon?" Professor Oak asked.
	"No, just a check-up." Ash answered.
	"Say, you didn't by any chance catch another pokemon, did you?" Professor Oak asked.
	"Yep.  It's just a pidgey, but I know it'll be a strong pokemon by the time I'm done training it." Ash said confidently.
	"HA!  That little brat owes me a million bucks!  Now, Ash, two other pokemon trainers'll be on their way to the center.  One of them is going to need a lot of help, so if you meet her, could you give her a hand?" Professor Oak asked.
	"I guess I could help her out." Ash answered.
	"That's great, Ash.  Make sure that your Pokedex scans everything you come across, all right?  Don't just let it grow inactive.  The more pokemon you find and catch, the more complete the Pokedex will become." Professor Oak said.
	"What's so special about the Pokedex?" Misty asked.
	"Well, most Pokedexes are made with information inside them and can only tell you what they know.  They can't add information or improve themselves.  Ash's Pokedex is special because it CAN improve itself, scan creatures and such.  It can also temporarily record fights for later viewing, so you can see what you did wrong." Professor Oak explained.
	"Wow.  And to think I got this for free." Ash commented.
	"I feel that no matter how much the city pokemon researchers search, there are going to be smart and/or rare pokemon that will avoid their presense, in which case, the four pokemon trainers that I selected, yourself included, Ash, could find the pokemon that no one else can." Professor Oak declared.
	"Well, why don't you do it?" Ash asked.
	"I'm getting too old to just go running around to find pokemon.  Not to mention that I really messed up my back catching these latest pokemon." Professor Oak answered, rolling his left arm while putting his right hand on the shoulder to keep it from overextending and popping out of the joint (although if that ever happened, don't show me or tell me because I'll puke).
	"Then I won't disappoint you, Professor Oak.  I'll make sure that I find all the pokemon of the world!" Ash said.
	"Good luck, Ash.  I've got some research to get to, so I'll be seeing you, Ash." Professor Oak declared, closing the connection.
	"Don't you sound heroic?" Misty asked.
	"It seemed appropriate." Ash said, shrugging.
	No sooner had he finished his sentence than a skylight shattered, revealing a floating purple pokemon with a skull and crossbones painted on it's stomach and various odd stumps protruding from it's body.  Suddenly, the pokemon began spewing out smog, causing Misty and Ash to begin coughing and covering their mouths in a vain attempt to keep the pokemon's smoke out of their lungs.
	"Prepare for trouble..." came a female voice through the smoke.
	"And make it double." came a male voice.
	"To protect the world from devastation." the female voice declared.
	"To unite all peoples within our nation." the male voice added.
	The smoke faded enough for Ash and Misty to breath.
	"To denounce the evils of Truth and Love." the female voice continued.
	"To extend our reach to the stars above." the male voice joined in.
	Ash and Misty looked at the blue-haired male and the red-haired female, both wearing white outfits with 'R's on the chests.  The only differences in the outfits was the fact the girl was wearing a short white mini-skirt and her shirt and a 'V' cut out of the bottom to give her room to breathe.  Her hair was long and if you ignored the fact that a human was attached to it, it resembled a comet flying through the cosmos.  The boy's hair was cut short.  He wore long pants which were covered near the bottom by the boots he was wearing.
	"JESSIE!" the female declared her name.
	"JAMES!" the male added.
	"This is getting stupid." Ash commented.
	"What do you mean by 'getting'?  This was stupid when they started." Misty replied.
	"Team Rocket, blast off at the speed of light!" Jessie declared, taking a sentai-esque pose, pointing to the right with her left hand.
	"Surrender now or prepare to fight!" James rhymed, taking a similiar pose to Jessie, except for the fact that he was pointing to the left with his right hand.
	"Hey, Misty, these must be the pokemon thieves.  Let's get our pokemon." Ash hissed to Misty.
	"Right." Misty agreed.
	Suddenly, a cat with a golden coin-like object sticking out of it's forehead landed in the middle and finished the spiel.
	"MEOWTH!  Dat's right!" the cat added.
	"What's going on in here?" the nurse demanded, returning with Pidgey, Pikachu and Misty's pokeballs.
	Misty raced over and snatched up her pokeballs. She looked at one and turned back to the thieves as Pikachu and Pidgey landed on Ash's shoulders.
	"Okay, you guys, these guys are pokemon thieves.  Get ready to fight." Ash warned.
	"Pika!" Pikachu said, nodding.
	"Wark!" Pidgey included.
	"HMPH!  You think your pitiful electric rat and that tiny BIRD will do anything to OUR pokemon?  Ekans!" Jessie declared.
	A large purple snake appeared behind Jessie.
	"Koffing!" James barked.
	The floating purple pokemon floated up behind James.
	"And what make you think that they're your only opponents?" came the question.
	Jessie and James turned to see young man with messy brown hair and sharp blue eyes glaring at them.  He was wearing a black t-shirt and blue jeans and had a green baseball cap on.  He smirked.
	"SHAMROCK!  BAMBI!  PEN-PEN!  GO!" he called out, tossing three pokeballs.
	"PIKACHU!  PIDGEY!  GO!" Ash cried.
	"POLIWAG!  STARYU!  GO!" Misty cried.
	"EEP!" Jessie, James and Meowth yelped in unison.

	By the time the police arrived, Jessie and James were tied up and their pokemon were in pokeballs.  Jessie and James were hauled away as the police woman that Ash and Misty encountered earlier approached them with the pokeballs holding Meowth, Ekans and Koffing.
	"Well, thank you for catching these thieves.  Here.  I don't think they'll be needing their pokemon." the officer said, handing three pokeballs to Ash.
	Ash handed Misty a pokeball and the other boy took his.
	"Ben, right?" Ash asked.
	"I'm surprised.  We hardly even saw each other, Ash." the boy answered.
	"Well, I remembered your name anyway.  You were one of the only other people to pass the exam to get a starting pokemon." Ash commented.
	"I really didn't need it.  I've been raising a Rattata and a Pidgey for quite some time now.  But still, Bulbasaurs are strong when you raise one right.  Hey, did you get your pants glued to the fence by that jerk Greg?" Ben asked.
	"Yeah.  He's a jerk, ain't he?" Ash replied.
	"Not to mention he took a CAR to Pewter City.  The jerk's not even going to bother getting pokemon.  He's just going to use his Charmander to challenge the gym.  Hmph.  Won't he be surprised when he finds out about the Pewter Gym." Ben answered.
	"Why?  What's at Pewter Gym?" Ash asked.
	"Ah, it couldn't hurt.  Pewter Gym is famous for Rock Pokemon.  His Charmander's fire attacks are going to be useless against those things.  And unless he finds a few more pokemon, he'll be in deep trouble when his Charmander takes on those things." Ben answered.
	"Ooooh.  Those things are tough.  I'd better work Pidgey and Pikachu up a bit before taking on the Pewter Gym." Ash muttered to himself.
	"Well, I'll be seeing you two." Ben said before skipping away while singing, "I'm off to see the wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz..."
	"What a weirdo." Misty commented.
	"No kidding." Ash answered.
	"So, what pokemon did I get?" Misty wondered aloud.
	"I could check them with my Pokedex." Ash offered.
	"Sure." Misty said, holding her new pokeball out.
	Ash took out his Pokedex and set it to Scan Pokeball.  The answer came back and Ash read it aloud.
	"An Ekans." Ash announced.
	"Well, I suppose that's good..." Misty began.
	"It's a ground Pokemon.  It'll be a great start to your new collection." Ash said.
	"What did you get?" Misty asked.
	The Pokedex came back with the answer.
	"The Koffing.  Still, they can't be all that bad, right?" Ash answered.
	"So that means Ben has the Meowth." Misty concluded.
	"Yeah, I guess so.  Well, since you guys are all checked, let's get going." Ash commented.

	"This better be worth it, Fox." Ben warned.
	"Don't worry.  It'll be worth it.  She's my best pupil.  She'll listen ta me." Fox the Meowth said.
	Fox walked over to the bars to see Jessie sitting alone on the detention cell bench.  In about a day, she'd be transferred to a real prison.  Fox didn't want that to happen to Jessie.  James, however, would never listen to Fox, so he was a dead-end cause.  Jessie, though, wasn't a dead-end.  She still had potential.
	"Jessie?" Fox asked.
	"Meowth?" Jessie asked, raising her head, her eyes showing that she had been crying.
	"It's Fox now." Fox answered.
	Jessie lowered her head.  Fox decided to just tell her.  After all, she deserved the truth.
	"Jessie, I've gotta deal for you and it's for you alone.  I'm not giving dis deal ta James at all.  Jessie, dah police are willing ta cut a deal.  You get let outta here," Fox began, causing Jessie to raise her head, "under supervision of course, and bring back da pokemon we stole.  Dah charges are dropped against you and you can start all over again."
	"What about the charges against James?" Jessie asked.
	Fox's look hardened.
	"He'll be on dah receiving end of the charges." Fox answered.
	"What?!" Jessie demanded.
	"Dis is why you're dah only one getting the deal.  For one of you ta be free, dah othah has ta be sent to prison.  It's either dat or you both go and you never see each othah evah again." Fox answered.
	Jessie thought about her decision.  She knew James had never been too nice to Fox or any other pokemon.  Even his personal pokemon, Koffing was often being abused.  She at least trusted and loved the pokemon she took care of.  The more she thought about it, the more of his true character revealed itself to her.  Maybe prison was the best place for him.
	"All right." Jessie answered.

===============================================================================================

	A darker Team Rocket, but eh.  By the way, if you're wondering, this is the end of anything resembling the Animated timeline.  From now on, it's pure original thought....and the game.
	In the next Pokemon HAHAHAHAHA:
	Ash and Misty enter Virdian Forest and come across various bugcatching Trainers.  Meanwhile, Ben and Jessie are heading for Mt. Moon to find the pokemon that Team Rocket stole, only to find...
	Find out on the next (hopefully) exciting episode of Pokemon HAHAHAHAHA!: The Battle For Pokemon!

	Comment, Flames, etc. can go to - akun15@hotmail.com
	Visit A-kun's Webpage at - http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Island/3968/index.html
	Visit A-kun's Pokemon webpage at - http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Island/3968/pokemon/pokemon.html


------------------

	Omake!  (WARNING: BAD PUNS!)

------------------

	They began walking past when a police woman stepped out.
	"STOP!  IN THE NAME OF LOOOOVE!" she sang.
	"BEFORE YOU BREAK MY HEART!" Ash and Misty joined in.
	"THINK IT OO-OOO-OOVER!   THINK IT OO-OOO-OOVER!" the trio sang in unison.

	"Yep.  It's just a Pidgey, but I know it'll be a strong pokemon by the time I'm done training it." Ash said confidentally.
	"HA!  That little brat owes me a million bucks!  Now, Ash, since I can't leave the lab, I going to ask you to get that little snotwad to pony up..." Professor Oak said.
	"Youse got it, Oaky." Ash replied.

	"So, Ash, your mother told me that you arrived in Viridian City without any problems.  Is there anything wrong with your pokemon?" Professor Oak asked.
	"Yes, they've joined my ever-growing army of the undead... muwheheheheheheheh...." Ash chuckled.
	"Um, Ash, you have to let go of the button to close the channel." Misty informed him.
	"Well sonovabit-" Ash grumbled, releasing the button.