The Top Forty-Six Reasons A-kun Couldn't Get His Or His Friends' Fanfics Out On Time
46. His life got REALLY complicated after a misprint in over 10,000 Wizard Magazines
listed him as the Rarest Pokemon Alive.
45. He was trapped aboard McBabylon 3, the not-so-last, not-so-best hope for humanity.
44. Got between the Death Star and the Rebel Fleet. Twice!
43. A-kun was sent "into another dimension" as Vegeta got angry at him for taking the
last donut.
42. Was blown up by one of Wily E. Coyote's ACME inventions.
41. Was nearly killed by a mutant strain of String Cheese that was plotting to take over
the world! (Behold the power of Cheese!)
40. Made the mistake of eating at a White Castle 'burger' joint.
39. A-kun 'accidentally' got between Usagi Tsukino, Lina Inverse and the last chocolate
milkshake.
38. He was involved in a freak bungee jump accident that destroyed half of the moon. (It
got better!)
37. He had to hit two homeruns during the World Series to help a little sick kid in the
hospital.
36. The A-kunmobile was in the shop for remodeling.
35. His life got REALLY complicated after a misprint in over 2,000 People Magazines
listed him as the Sexiest Woman Alive.
34. Knows the secret to the Postal System.
33. Directed the movie .
32. Bimbo Movie Bash Part 3.
31. He was being held down in bed by a mystical force called "gravity".
30. He _didn't_ go sky-diving.
29. They're controlling his mind with Pikachus in full tuxedoes with top hats!
28. His calculator can't access the Internet. Nor can his cellphone. He moped for weeks.
27. He got sauced on Jolt Cola. He later woke up with a hangover and a hanger in his pants.
26. It took him two weeks to figure out his keyboard was just disconnected.
25. His Etch-A-Sketch locked up on him.
24. TharzZzDunN.
23. Two Words: Ucchan's Okonomiyaki.
22. Van Halen needed him to play Lead Guitar for a while. He wound up a go-fer. (Go-fer this, go-fer that...)
21. Two for One rentals at Video Update.
20. He was temporarily snapped from existance thanks to another Windows '95 bug.
19. He slipped and fell half-way down a staircase, then managed to leap and land safely
at the bottom of the stairwell. Then a jar of pickles fell on his head.
18. Tried to ice skate... in the Mall of America. (you never want to hear the sound of
ice skates grating against concrete)
17. Peanut butter.
16. A tire iron to the back of the head. (Damn rebellious characters.)
15. The anime he purchased swallowed all his money.
14. He actually got a date... *bursts out laughing*
13. Let's face it, Xena was on.
12. He was out of Bus Tokens.
11.
10. History of the Brassiere, Part 1: Adding more bounce to the ounce. He got headaches afterwards trying to look at stationary objects.
9. He got a free pizza and delivery, so he stayed at home. Two days later, he figured
out he had to order the pizza first.
8. A really complex trap involving him, 8 liters of motor oil, six bags of marbles, a
crack across the back of the head with a mallet and a dirty .gif of Ami Mizuno. (again, damn rebellious characters)
7. He was kidnapped by Dr. Evil, who tried to ransom him for 1 trillion Lyra. Dr. Evil
was offered a five dollar bill and A-kun was released unwillingly ("I think I have what it
takes to be Evil!").
6. Data transfers from an abacus to a 486 take _FOREVER_!
5. Five day rentals from Blockbuster were twenty-eight days late.
4. Those rotten friends of his left him alone in the middle of the woods with the Blair Witch.
3. He discovered the secret to the Nyanniichuan (anything to get a date).
2. Screw "Y2K", A-kun's computer has the problem of "Why Only 1K"
And finally, the number one reason A-kun didn't or COULDN'T get the fanfics out...
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1. Thanks a _LOT_, Hotmail!
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geocities.com/tokyo/island) (
geocities.com/tokyo)