"I __(Insert Name)__ , do swear allegiance to Shinji
Ikari, pilot of Evangelion Unit One, and defender of Humanity. I
accept my holy charge to crusade against those who would belittle the Mighty
Shinji Ikari's name, and promise to always defend in his likeness.
I accept my responsibility to teach the true, heroic nature of the Mighty
Shinji Ikari's character and soul. Even in the face of ignorance
and childish humor, I will defend him against such attacks. I accept
Shinji Ikari as (One of my Heroes/My Greatest Hero) and will always aspire
to use his wisdom, strength and humility in my times of need. I shall
always laugh when anyone says "Thermal Expansion", and if possible, I shall
cover my groin with my hands in respect for Shinji Ikari. I promise
to always get Morning Wood around beautiful women, and never try to hide
it. (It's Morning and I can't help it anyway.) I promise to
keep a special place in my heart for red-heads and red-eyes, even if my
true love lies elsewhere. I promise to always go Berserk when I see
"Touched by an Angel" on TV, and whenever I need to destroy my foes.
I shall show my allegiance to the Mighty Shinji by flexing my right hand
before entering a challenge. I shall never think doing chores, cooking
and cleaning will ever make me a Bitch, and will do such acts with pride,
knowing the Mighty Shinji Ikari has done the same. Finally, I shall
always cheer when Shinji Ikari triumphs, both in Fanfiction and the canon
of Neon Genesis Evangelion, and defend him when he fails...For Shinji ain't
a bitch, and I am his humble disciple."
"I __(Insert Name)__, so swear allegiance to Shinji Ikari, pilot of Evangelion Unit One, and defended of Humanity. I accept my holy charge to crusade for the honor and dignity of the Mighty Shinji Ikari, and defend him against foolish old hens. Especially those who would question the Mighty Shinji Ikari's sexuality and his ability to kick Angel ass. When faced with the threat of such blatant, immature fantasies, I will strive to set things right again! I accept Shinji Ikari as one of the (Sexiest/Sweetest/Cutest) anime characters ever, and will aspire to seek out such manly perfection in my lifetime, even if such a thing is impossible. I shall, every so often, (Daydream/Fantasize/Dream) about being (Rei Ayanami/Asuka Langely/Misato Katsuagi) and being able to ("Boost" Shinji's Confidence/Fuck Shinji Silly/Make wild, passionate love with Shinji/Be his first Kiss/Be his first Love/((Insert fantasy)). I shall also put aside fantasies of Shinji and Kaoru, no matter how much it might sound nice, knowing that it would only leave less Shinji for me. I shall always look for Shinji-like qualities in men, and never take advantage of a nice guy who cooks/cleans and helps out with things most men wouldn't touch. I shall always have a drawer of white panties ready to explode over me and a male guest, and try to change my clothes in a stairwell on occasion, in hopes Shinji might be near. I shall only think of Shinji's shortcomings as Cute, and not wussy, for I know his heart is pure. I shall ONLY call those I love "Anta Baka?" and "Hentai!". I shall smile whenever anyone says "Strudel". I shall always defend Shinji Ikari's manhood and gentleman status in both Fanfiction and the canon of Neon Genesis Evangelion...For Shinji ain't a bitch, and I am his humble admirer."