The Asian Ganster Guy

• Usually seen: At the local billiard hall, at the local video arcade, at the bowling alley, at the college recreation room (ditching class), and at Korean Karaoke Bars.
• Usually wears: Ultimately insanely huge baggy pants, Nike Visor (upside down), Nike warm-up jacket. Pager/beeper/cellular phone (it has to be exposed so everyone can see it!). Also, he wears too many designer clothes just for their labels (Nautica, CK, Ralph Lauren, and JNCO). Accessories: Earrings and a hoe.
• A great Street Fighter and Tekken Player.
• No matter who's around (parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, teachers). He always has to act hard and tough. Gives that bad impression to everyone.
• Very good at the art of the home-invasion robbery.
• Has extremely extra long bangs coverin his eyes.
• Always tries to look hard, but actually he looks asleep.
• Am avid smoker, always holds his cigarette between his index n middle finger.
• Doesn'T KnoW HoW TO SmokE OnlY DoeS FoR ThE TougH ImagE.
• Only fights if he has ten guys backin him up.
• Usually drives a slammed Honda Civic or Acura Integra or Mitsubishi Eclipse, which he tries to squeeze 10 ppl inside of.
• Has stickers on every inch of their cars.
• drives fast to impress his friends or his chick... actually he's endangering the lives of the ppl n pedestrians around him. of course, he is a racer... fixin up his car for "racin."
• Calls other asians "nigga" and is dying of the ebonic plague.
• Too much talk and not enough action!
• Girls hang with him because of his " big " reputation plus he's got other guys hanging around him and guys hang with him because they think that he can protect them by bringing backup whenever anything happens and they want him to hook them up with pagers, phones, and girls.

The Asian Show Off

Usually seen: At the local billiards hall, at the bowling alley, at the church youth groups, at the college recreation room (trying to pick up on girls!) and at the casino (trying to act like a high roller).

Usually wears: Tucked-in dress shirt with loose-fit khakis. Holster for his cell phone.

Always showing off his cellphone, constantly talks into it

Sometimes fakes that he talking into it so he can impress the girls.

Every one of these guys have circular glasses!

Another avid smoker, like a chimney!

Usually drives a Mazda RX-7 or a Toyota Supra.

Thinks he can drive fast, but actually drives like an old Chinese woman, on a cellular phone (which is probably one of the most dangerous drivers on the road!)

Always says that he's peaceful and he claims Asian pride, but he has gangster tendencies when there is a threat to his popularity or when a guy moves in on his girl.

Tries to be a high roller... thinks he's an awesome gambler.

Always wears designer clothes, never wears shorts... even if it's 90 degrees outside.

Has too much Dragon Ball crap in his web-site.

Girls hang with him so he can spend money on them or they just want to be seen in his car. Guys hang with him because they also want him to spend money on them and they want to steal valuables in his house!

The Asian Squatter

Usually seen: At the local billiards hall, at the bowling alley, at the college recreation room (playing billiards, of course), in the front of every asian restaurant (squatting, of course)

Usually wears: Tries to make his clothes look baggy...but never can quiteget the look of the gangster. Then ends up wearing long shorts. Always wears slippers.

Usually a new immigrant to the states (aka F.O.B.s)

Always smokes while squatting

Always speaks native language while making fun of people who do not speak his language (i.e. Americans and Asian-Americans)

The master of the home invasion robbery.

Yet when he pulls a robbery, he always brags about it or shows off his fortune, which ends up getting him caught for his foolishness.

A compulsive gambler, will gamble any game and gamble anything he owns.

Cannot live without cheating... he is dishonest.

Cheats at every test... thing is that when he cheats, everyone knows it and he brags about it.

Always lying, saying B.S. stories about the fights he won, the money he won and the houses he robs, of course, this puts him behind bars.

Girls only talk to him when they want to cheat on a test otherwise they detest him, and guys hang with him because they want to hire him for a robbery or that he's crazy enough to do whatever they say!

The Asian Basketball Player

Usually seen: At the local billiards hall, at the basketball court and at the gym.

Usually wears: Nike or Addidas shoes. Nike tank top and North Carolina basketball shorts. Also, Nike warm-ups with one pant leg up.

Also known as the "baller"

Has the most expensive Nike shoes on earth... (this goes with my theory that the worst basketball players at the local courts have the best and most expensive shoes!)

Does too many head fakes and pump fakes.

His girlfriend is always watching him play, she is usually sitting on the bench or in the stands, staring at other guys.

Always wears those Nike muscles shirts, you know the sleeveless ones... yet they're so skinny, they look so stupid in them.

Of course he wears the Nike visor, upside-down though.

Tries to hustle other basketball players, but ends up losing all his money, because he can't play for squat!

Tries to ball, but ends up fouling everyone and bitching about feeling fouled.

Girls can care less about him and Guys use him for hook-ups for shoes and clothes.

The Asian White Guy

Usually seen: At a bar with his white guy buddies, drinking copious amounts of beer and listening to hard rock.

Usually wears: plaid shirts, concert T-shirt (NIN or Van Halen, usually), non-baggy jeans and construction boots.

Usually drinks to much, to cope with his "problems"

Makes way too big a deal about his ethnicity (calls himself "chink" all the time)

Lusts after blonde chicks who wouldn't give him the time of day

Always complains about Asian white girls who go out with white guys and stares daggers at'em

Glares at fobby types because they "ruin his image"

Purposely does badly in school to dispel the stereotype .

Gets drunk on the fumes of Vodka, Everclear or Wild Turkey.

Usually vomitting around last call because of the lack of digentive enzymes

Girls are intimidated by his bitterness, and guys only hang out with him because he gets drunk and buys people extra rounds.

The Asian Clubber

Shops at Gadzooks or Merry Go Round, or any place that sells "club wear."

Keeps himself in excellent physical shape.

Wears tight hard-body shirts whenever he can.

Won't wear anything bigger than a medium (Prevents others from seeing his physique).

Pants are a bit baggy, but not too baggy.

Has no girlfriend per se, but has many female friends.

Not a trouble-maker, but always looks for action at the clubs.

Drives a tricked-out car, but prefers a domestic just to be different.

Gets along with everyone. Has no attributes for others to dislike him.

Girls hang out with him because he can bench at least 225 and has 16-inch arms. Guys hang out with him hoping that they can get hooked up with the girls that follow him around.

The Gangster Asian Girl

Usually seen: At the mall and at the poolhall, usually giving dirty looks at other asian girls. Inside a crowded Civic with other gangster girls and anywhere the gangster asian is.

Usually wearing: tight shirts, spaghetti strap blouses, or baggy jeans.

Loves to wear black lipstick and 10-inch heels.

Yet when wearing baggy blue jeans, she will wear a Nike warm-up jacket.

Another Pochaco, Keroppi, Sanrio nut.

Of course, she has dyed-blond hair and REALLY black roots!

Believes she's a Sailor-Scout of Sailor Moon.

A tenth degree black-belt in the art of back stabbing.

Talks big, but no action.

Is extremely good at talking behind backs, only will talk stuff about you when you're beyond a 20-mile radius.

Has a protruding mouth, like a monkey.

Whenever she wants to look attractive and goes over the edge by wearing skirts up to her stomach.

Girls hang with her because she will fight for them... and Guys hang with her because they want to get her in bed and she'll fight for them.

The Over-Dressed Asian Girl

Usually seen: At the mall, at the poolhall , at the casino (not gambling but sitting next to boyfriend, staring at his money and his chips) , at the youth group meetings (usually the leader) , at the Karaoke bar and inside boyfriend's expensive car.

Usually wears: tight skirts, bellbottom pants (the ones in which they cannot see their feet), high heels or 10-inch platforms (which they have no idea how to walk on, they always look off-balance while walking)

She must wear her skanky outfits everywhere they go.

You can hear the cloggin' of her platform heels from a mile away.

Always showing off her cellphone... always pretending she's talking to her rich boyfriend!

Of course, she has dyed-blond hair.

Another Pochaco, Keroppi, Sanrio freak.

Another tenth-degree black belt in the art of backstab.

Plucks her eyebrows, and her eyebrows are just one line!

She is the ultimate snob... mastered the art of walking with her nose up.

Believes she is "all that"... and enjoys ignoring other guys.

Has a new pair of shoes every week.

Girls hang with her because she makes them look good and they like to borrow clothes from her... and Guys hang with because they want to get her in bed and use her as their car accesory.

The Asian Schoolgirl

Usually seen: In the study hall or under house-arrest by her parents.

Usually wears: thick eye-glasses, long sundresses, pennyloafers or sandals.

Are completely male-phobic

Sometimes shy, but really anti-social

Another Sanrio, Keroppi, Pochaco nut... but she talks to her dolls because she has no social life.

When approached by a male, she always says and I'm quoting, " I con't tok to youu rite naow!"

Has no social skills whatsoever.

Is the master cheat sheet on all tests.

Talks too loud in her native language.

Girls hang with her so they can cheat off her for tests and she has a nice car... and Guys hang with because they also like to cheat off her on tests and they think they can get a date with her.

The Asian White Girl