Elder Rape


Last year in my medium sized town, we had three rapes of elderly women. The youngest victim was 72 and the oldest was 84. Ironically, the oldest victim had the youngest rapist (age 20). Many people do not think of elderly women as rape victims. Especially victims of men less than a quarter of their age. Since rape is a crime of power and not sex, we can easily understand why elderly women are chosen as rape victims.

The preferential type of offender delibrately chooses to rape elderly women because these women remind them of another older woman in his life. The offender is emotionally dependent on this older woman (and often financially dependent as well). The rapes often occur after this older relative has died or suffered a catastrophic illness. And this is a way the offender shows his resentment towards the relative who has "abandoned" him.

The opportunistic offender is more interested in younger victims. However, many times younger victims are too intimadating for the offender or the offender is physically unable to overpower a younger victim, so he chooses older women because they are less able to resist attack.

The victims of elder rape are often reluctant to report this crime to police. The attitude of "who would believe that someone would want an old woman like me?" is prevalant. They come from a time where rape was thought to be caused by sexual desire and victims somehow "tempted" their offenders. They do not understand that what makes a desirable sex partner does not make a desirable rape victim. They often hide their trauma and do not seek help.

Which brings on another subject, trauma. I have worked with the elderly for eight years now. I have found that elderly people do not "bounce back" from injury, physical and mental as well as younger people. The 84 year old woman that I mentioned at the beginning eventually had to be placed in a nursing home because the trauma had made her "confused" and unable to care for herself. Previously, she had been living independently in her own home and might have continued to do so if she had not been raped. One has to wonder how many elders have been raped and have lost their mental balance because of trauma and depression from the attack.

Since the public does not understand the dynamics of rape and rape trauma, they do not realize that elderly women who have deteriorated may have been victims of a crime. So they do not investigate the possiblity of rape.

I would like to see more publicity on rape and rape trauma. Especially offender's motives behind rape. Let's educate our elderly so that they will report rape and seek the help they need. And I would like to see rape crisis centers with at least one counselor who specializes in elderly rape victims. For I believe that rape at that age brings up special issues.

The first issue that I mentioned above is the reaction of "who would want an old woman like me?". More education on offenders is needed. Explaining why a sex offender would pick an older woman would help encourage older women to come forward if they are attacked.

The second issue is independence. Most elderly people lose their independence through mental instability. A counselor must work hard to maintain an elderly rape victim's stability. Even if the attack does not send the victim into confusion immediately, other factors will cause confusion.

Depression for the attack may cause an elderly victim to neglect her medications, her appearance, and her nutrition. All these may affect her emotional stability. A counselor should watch for those signs and take steps to prevent neglect. The counselor should also work with community services to deliver meals, medications, and house keeping until the victim is more able to handle things on her own.

A third issue is the prosecution of the offender. Many elderly victims are reluctant to testify. They may be confused and unable to testify. Plus, the practical problems of attending court: transportation, waiting, possible contact with the offender. Volunteer escorts are ideal for this as well as a special sequestered room for the victims is desirable. The room can be made comfortable with soft chairs and an adjacent bathroom.

A fourth issue is medical. Many elderly victims have not had sex for years. A rape can cause serious injuries which could lead to infections. The skin of many elderly people is very fragile, the slightest pressure could cause wounds and bleeding. Each elderly rape victim would need a complete medical exam to detect injuries that could lead to infection.

STDs are another possiblity. Elderly people are more fragile and their injuries would expose them to STDs easily. Elderly women would be more ashamed of contracting a STD and would need more encouragement to be treated.

The final issue is privacy. Since shame would be a great part of the trauma following the attack, many elderly rape victims may not want to seek help. They do not want their families to know that they have been assaulted. Even if the victim does not want to prosecute, medical help and counseling should be available without notification of the victim's family. It is vital that these victims receive help, and guaranteeing complete privacy is a must.

In conclusion, elder rape victims need and deserve more help than we as a society are giving them at the present time. We should step up our efforts to reach out to these women and help them through their trauma.


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