The mere existance of this page is a sign that I don't want
to write my International Politics paper!
My first tape:
-
Prank Call
"Harry Sachz!"
-
No Service
"FIRE! FIRE!"
-
Stewart is Missing
"You'd look good with big hooters, Beavis"
"Is your house on fire?"
-
Vidiots
"There are no Mexicans here!"
-
U.S. History
VanDreisen: "These are by far the best oral reports ive heard."
Butthead: "Oral, heh!"
Beavis: "I'm gonna do an anal report!"
-
Blood Pressure
-
Sprout
-
Gang of Two
-
Sporting Goods
-
Cleaning House
"It must fit somewhere. Maybe your butt?"
-
Babysitting
"Get ready for a surprise. You think its a girl but its a guy."
-
Mystery of Morning Wood
"The secret is too dangerous!"
-
Untitled (early episode - 93)
Dream about playing a concert.
Toad licking.
Air guitar "Smoke on the Water"
"These mimes are cool cuz they make lotsa noise and scream."
-
Burger World (early episode - 93)
The boys screw up Anderson's order, and give him a mouseburger and french flies.
TV:"Attention Homeowners"
Butthead:"Pay attention, Beavis."
"Chode encounters of the turd kind."
"Those guys better look out for the klingons near Uranus!"
-
Choke
"Have I licked his rectum ?!"
"Thank you, drive through."
-
Safe House
The boys take a pounding for Todd.
-
Untitled (early episode - 93)
Babes-R-Us
Cha Cha Cha!
"Don't make me shove this thing up your Butt!"
Beavis 'Shoots the moon' in this one.
-
Be All You Can Be
Sgt. Dick Leaky guest stars.
"Free Explosives!"
Highway to Hell in this one!
"I've had this shirt on for six months."
-
Killing Time
...waiting for something good to come on T.V.
Hulk Hogan's video! lose this one!
about steroids:
ButtHead "They make you all big and strong but then they like make your nads shrink."
Beavis "Whoa. what's the point?"
Beavis "Thinking sucks."
They watch an electric meter and try to vomit to pass time,
a little trash-can dodge ball.
(The show they are waiting for is a Suzanne Summers infomercial.)
Butthead "Whoa!"
Beavis "Yeah!"
Butthead "Whoa!"
Beavis "Yeah!"
Butthead "Whoa!"
Beavis "Yeah!"
Butthead "Whoa!"
Beavis "Yeah!"
-
Hard Sell
B&B get jobs selling magazines on the phone.
Butthead "Whoa, a hundred dollars a day. think of all the people we could help with that money."
Beavis "What?"
Beavis "Remeber when we went swimming by the power plant? it was all warm and stuff. that was cool."
Butthead "No it wasn't- your turds were orange for a month and you got those blisters on your nads."
Beavis "I know. I know. That's what I'm saying. It was cool."
Boss: "...keeps us number one."
Butthead "Number One."
Beavis "Tinkle, Tinkle, Tinkle!"
Butthead "Do you have any adult magazines?"
Beavis "Like national geographic?"
Butthead "I have a special deal for you. Its in my pants!"
Butthead "We could score with a chick in the video!"
Beavis "With a chicken?"
in a Blondie video :
Beavis "What is this 2 of hearts?"
Buttheah "Like when youre playing poker."
Butthead "Theres a full house in my pants."
Beavis "Yyeah, i have a straight."
Beavis "Hey Butthead what is a 357?"
Butthead "Its like when someone turns arouns in a circle."
Beavis "Ill be damned."