Chapter Ten: Heart Of Innocence
"Riyan, get your ass up" Alleah announced through the
door as she pounded religiously on it
I moaned slightly as my eyes cracked open. Through the slither of
my half open eye I caught the clock.
"Shit" I cursed bolting upwards, startling Brian who
had been fast asleep behind me.
It was going on 8:40 and we were supposed to leave at 9:00 to a
publicity signing.
"Uh, I'm up, I'm up" I called jumping out of the bed
"Yeah well you better be ready" she laughed
Brian groaned tiredly as he pulled himself out of the bed, still
dressed in the clothes he was wearing last night.
"What time is it?" he moaned, wiping his sleep eyes as
I ran around the room
"Quarter to almost" I muttered quietly
His eyes widened.
"Damn, we slept in alright" he chuckled
"Aren't you supposed to leave for Letterman?" I
questioned
Brian thought for a minute then frightfully stood up off the bed
and ran towards the door.
"Wait, Alleah's out there" I spoke, stopping him from
leaving "We cant let her see us together, for sure she'll
tell my father and Michael"
Brian nodded in agreement.
"I'll go out and distract her, when the coast is clear
sprint for the door okay?" I grinned, this sounded more like
a covert operation.
He nodded again as I cracked open the door and slithered out of
it.
"Alleah?" I called walking into the lounge room
She looked up from the breakfast she'd ordered from room service.
"What?" she muttered crossing her legs idly
"Um, could you come to the bathroom for a second?" I
smiled
"Why?" she scoffed
"Cause, the toilet doesn't flush" I smiled
"And that would be my problem why?"
"Please Alleah"
"God, fine" she huffed walking past the door to my room
and into the bathroom. Brian poked his head out of the door, and
I signaled for him to go. He winked once, then raced across the
room and out of the door, with Alleah not seeing a thing.
Alleah pushed down onto the flush button and the water spewed
into the bowl.
"Yes it does" she spat annoyed at my interruption
"Oh, whoop's sorry" I smiled sweetly
She huffed loudly as she pushed past me and back into the other
room.
~ AT THE SAME TIME ~
Brian hurried quickly down the hallway.
"Yo, ROK" Nick called from behind him
Brian stopped dead and slowly turned around.
"Where have you been? I've been pounding on your door for
the past 10 minutes" he smirked
"Oh, I um, went for a walk" Brian shrugged
"Good time to go for a walk" he mocked "we gotta
go in five minutes"
"Uhuh" Brian nodded as they walked together down to his
room.
~ LUNCH TIME ~
My hand ached beyond belief. I gave up counting how many
autographs I actually signed, but I was informed the crowd that
showed numbered over twelve hundred.
"Wow, they love you" Belle smiled as she walked around
the record stores corridors with me.
Alleah wanted to do some sightseeing, so Belle offered to stay
with me, plus she didn't really want to go to the show with the
guys.
"Thanks for coming" I smiled as I placed a coin into
the Coke Machine
"No probs, I had nothing better to do" she laughed
"Why didn't you want to go to the show with the guys, I
thought you would have"
Belle screwed up her face a little as I handed her a can of soda.
"I don't really like doing the whole publicity thing with
Nick, I don't need everyone to know I'm there, I prefer to be a
background girlfriend" she smiled
"No red carpets?"
"Sometimes. Most times the PR doesn't want us to walk down
with the guys, so the girlfriends, wives, dates, whatever usually
go in a backway or something"
"Harsh"
Belle shrugged softly, taking a sip of her drink.
"Doesn't really matter, I don't see why I need to be in the
camera. I'm Nick's girlfriend, not his trophy to pull around
everywhere, plus I don't want people to think I'm only with him
because of what publicity I can get" she smiled "So are
you up for some shopping?"
I gulped down another mouthful of soda and nodded
enthusiastically.
~ 2 DAYS LATER ~
It's
almost one in the morning, and for the love of God, I'm so wide
awake. We're on our way across to Nevada now, the bright lights
of Las Vegas.
Michael is so amazed with the response and the stir I've caused
and he's not the only one. I'm a little scared, overcome,
petrified, but I'm also truly inspired. I talked to Papa today,
he'd happy, or as best as could be expected, Grandmamma wants to
come and see me, buts she's a little sick now, and it wouldn't be
wise for her to fly. Papa has set up some sort of grant thing for
me, where most of what I earn is sent, he told me that only I can
get to it, and only when I turn 20, he says it will be my backup.
I don't care too much about the money, which most people don't
believe, but it is true. I mean what's money if you want have a
smile on your mouth? If I spent all of my time counting my
dollars, then I'd never have time to have fun, and as Mama always
said to me, when you're young the best part is to have fun. I do
still miss Mama, I miss her so much, but I know she's here with
me, I'm sure of it.
I have this smile forever forged on my face now, and I cant seem
to hide it, Brian and I have been getting closer, we spend as
much time as we can, just talking, I feel so at home with him,
and I'm sure he feels the same way. I really truly think we've
built a relationship that many wouldn't understand……though
I am young, and inexperienced, I really do believe that this is
love, I was always told that you just KNOW what it feels like,
and maybe - now, just maybe I KNOW.
Forever
Riyan
~ A WEEK LATER ~
I watched from the couch and Alleah left the hotel room with AJ,
I waved carelessly at them as AJ closed the door. I wasn't
thrilled with the idea of Alleah using AJ, like I was sure she
would, but then again it got her out of the room, and, like most
nights, she didn't return till morning, giving me and Brian
enough time to spend together.
I crept out of the hotel room, closing the door quietly behind
me, it was only a short jog to Brian's door, I knocked quietly
and within a few second, he opened the door and welcomed me in.
Without hesitation I kissed his square and passionately on the
lips.
"I've wanted to do that all day" I grinned
"Well then" he smirked
"God, what's that noise?" I questioned walking over to
the decking off the side of the suite
"Fan's, you get used to it" Brian shrugged
"You guys are so loved" I said in awe
"Listen" he spoke softly, covering my lips with his
fingers
We listened silently for a while. Then voices became clear.
"Oh my god" I gaped "some are saying my
name?"
He smiled softly, rubbing my shoulders as I turned and looked
back outside.
"They love you Riyan" he whispered
I turned back around slowly to face him.
"What about you? Do you love me?"
His smile was soft and gave me all the answer I needed.
"I do" he spoke softly, much like the words carried on
a breeze
"Brian" I spoke up, my lip quivering
"Yes?"
"Could you, could we, uh" I muttered wanting to say the
words so much "I want to" I whispered, scared he would
reject me
He looked at me calmly, a serious expression across his face.
"I'm not going to do anything you don't want me to do
Riyan"
I touched his arm softly. Maybe my feelings could be read through
a touch, maybe. I starred up at him strongly, surely he could see
it in my eyes.
"I want to Brian, I want to be with you"
He looked down at the ground for a moment, was there something he
wasn't telling me, was the age thing too hard for him? Why wasn't
he answering? He turned away from me and walked in no particular
direction.
"You don't want to?" I questioned, confusion written
all over my face
"No, Riyan, it's not that" he sighed painfully
"You're so young, I don't want you to feel pressured"
he remarked
"I don't care about my age Brian, and I don't care about
yours, all I care about is what feels right, and this, us, this
does" I explained, my heart yearning more and more for him
"would you make love to me if I was 25?"
He looked across at me, and nodded slowly.
I squirmed painfully. It was the age, that was all.
"I'm sorry I'm not" I whispered walking towards the
door. I turned around to face him as I reached for the door
handle.
"I never asked you to love my age Brian, just me" I
sniffed opening the door.
"Riyan wait" he called
I closed the door and looked around at him.
"I do love you, I really do"
"Then why is this so hard?"
"I just don't want to take away the one thing I cant ever
give back. I don't want to take your innocence Riyan, I don't
want to take that, only for you to regret it"
"You think I'll regret it?"
"You're young, you have so much ahead of you"
"But I want you"
"But will you still want me tomorrow? Next week? Don't live
for the moment Riyan, because you may regret it"
"I'll love you forever if you'll have me" I cried, a
tear falling from my eye
He leaned in, kissing me softly and passionately. Again silence
enveloped us as we locked eyes, desperate to understand.
"I do want this" I smiled
"Are you sure?"
My hands held either side of his head gently as I kissed him
deeply, using the passion in my lips as the answer.
He dimmed the lights over my shoulder and lead me slowly to the
bed. Silently I sat down as he sat beside me. We kissed again,
his tongue sliding around my mouth in pure passion. I laid back,
as his hands gently explored my body. He broke away from the
kiss, his hand lying on my waist as he lay down beside me.
"If you ever want me to stop, just say so" he smiled
I nodded.
"I promise I wont hurt you" he smiled kissing my
forehead, perhaps sensing my nervousness.
"Brian?"
He looked up.
"Show me how to love you" I smiled, encasing my hand in
his
"Just breathe" he smiled, lying me down fully onto my
back.
His lips traced a line from one shoulder to the other, around to
my neck and down my chest as he lifted my top over my head. He
pulled off his shirt next revealing his skinny body. I smiled
admiringly at him, he didn't have a six-pack or anything, but he
was beautiful. My hands traced his outline. His skin was so soft,
so warm, almost like I could melt into him, and never come out. I
closed my eyes unknowingly as he slid my pants gently down my
legs. The feeling of material sliding down my legs had never felt
so, sensual, but as his hands followed along behind I felt a rush
of something unknown up my entire body. My eyes opened again, as
her removed his own. He kissed me again, before starting a new
trail of kisses across my stomach, I reached down, fingering
through his hair, as I felt the moist sensation of his mouth on
my body. His hand slid up between my legs, creating goose-bumps
all over my body. They slid under the band of my underwear, not
delving any deeper as he fell down beside me, his other arm
holding me tightly.
"I can stop anytime you ask me to" he breathed into my
ear
"I don't want you to stop" I sighed, overcome with a
sense of amazement
He undressed me further, as my breath quickened, his hand gently
doing something, which drove me wild to say the least. Before
long we were both naked, as we slipped under the sheets of the
bed, covering our love from the outside world, he slipped on a
condom he pulled out of the bedside table, then moved over me
again.
He kissed my lips again as he hovered above me. Again he asked me
if I was alright, I nodded again, biting my lips, my eyes closed,
as I could feel him growing above me. A new sensation filled me
as he gently slid himself into me. I yelped a little, as both a
mixture of pain and pleasure encased me. His hand stroked my face
his other hand sliding across my body.
"Are you okay?" he questioned, his voice deep and quiet
"It hurts a little" I whispered, unsure if that was
normal
"It's okay, that's normal" he smiled sweetly,
immediately putting my mind to rest
"I'm gonna go in a little deeper" he whispered, his
voice filling my ear
His legs rubbed up against mine as he went deeper, a loud gasp
pushed through my pursed lips as I held him tightly. The pain had
become unimportant as another feeling swept over me. He moved
back and forth, or bodies sliding over each other, our lips
meeting in haste.
It seemed like a lifetime flew by as the most amazing feeling
wrapped itself around me. I looked up at Brian, tiny beads of
sweat formed on his hairline as he smiled lovingly at me. He
whispered me loved me, as he withdrew. My body shivered as I felt
something "click" inside me. My toes curled and my
heart raced, and I cried out again as he fell beside me.
His arms held me tightly as he breathed a sigh, his eyes slightly
closed.
"What was that?" I questioned a little, wondering what
had come over my body
"That, was an orgasm" he smiled holding me tightly
"Did you?" I questioned, laughing a little
He nodded slowly as I nestled into his shoulder
"Thank you" I whispered kissing his arms
"No, thank you Riyan" he breathed "I love
you" I added kissing my head
I sighed again, overcome with an amazing sense of satisfaction, I
knew I had made the right decision, I didn't regret anything I
was sure I never would.