~ 1 WEEK LATER ~
Dear
Diary
I can't believe this is actually happening to me, I now, as of
today, have a sign sealed and delivered contract with five of the
sweetest guys I know, I'm still not sure what it was they saw in
me, but whatever it was, I'm thankful to have it. My uncle says
its potential, he really thinks I could go places, me, I'm a
little more skeptical. I don't have huge plans, I don't want to
live on Malibu beach in a house the size of a small castle, I
just want to try, I want to be the very best I can, and if I try
and fall, then its better to have never tried at all.
My parents are ecstatic, Mama has a smile permanently attached to
her face, Papa too is happy, though masks it with the occasional
remark about my safety, that's Fathers for you I suppose. Grandma
is more happy than I've seen her my entire lifetime, Mama once
told me that Grandma had dreams of singing too, but her dreams
were never fulfilled, I hope deep down that I can fulfill her
dreams through me. Alleah agreed to be my guardian, I don't know
what she was offered, but you can bet anything she's destined to
get something out of it, she would never actually offer to HELP
anyone, I suppose I shouldn't say those things about her, after
all, though I hate to admit it, I owe a lot to her. She laughed
non-stop when I told her about the guys, she couldn't believe I
was so withdrawn to not even know who they were, she of course
knew and found great delight in calling me an idiot, but I
suppose she's right, I am fairly withdrawn, I just sometimes
prefer my own world to the real one.
Anyway I should go now, my plane to Florida leaves in a few hours
and I have to say goodbye to everyone.
Wish me luck
Riyan
"Riyan, come in here for a moment" Papa announced as I
wandered down the stairs
"Yes?" I responded as I walked into the lounge, from
where he was calling me
He stood directly behind a large wooden chest that stood
magnificently glazed.
"This is for you" he smiled proudly
I'd seen a lot of my fathers work for other people, but this,
this chest was more than beautiful.
"Mine?" I stuttered walking up to it
"Papa has been making it since the day you were born"
Mama smiled
My hand ran across it, already I could see it full of everything
that meant something to me, I would fill it with dreams, with
hopes and with everything that made me happy.
"I was going to give it to you on your wedding day, but I
think you deserve in now, to remind you of your roots" Papa
explained as he leant down.
"This rose here" he smiled pointing to the rose in the
center of the box, which seemed to have ever other pattern
someone from it, "it's you Riyan, the pattern around it will
be the lives of the people you touch, and the people that mean
the most to you. Inside are your dreams and your hopes. The
corners of the chest are your strong hold, Mama" he began
pointing to each corner "Papa, your best friend" he
stopped at the fourth corner "your love" he smiled,
finishing his sentence
"But I don't have one" I smiled, innocently looking up
at you
"You will my child, when your heart is ready, you will"
his hand grazed the side of my face, "now promise me, you
will keep this with you, for always" he smiled, unlocking
the lid and opening it up
"I promise Papa" I replied, hugging him
enthusiastically
On the inside lid of the lid, he'd engraved my name, my birthday
and;
"Nothing will come of nothing. Dare mighty things" -
Shakespeare.
~ 2 DAYS LATER - FLORIDA ~
I sculled back the bottled water in record time, as the sweat
pored down my face, I was hardly in the country and I was already
working my butt off. The dance routines were hard, and taxing,
but I was determined not to fail, not this close. With each day I
became more confident, like I could almost smell success. Alleah
had spent most of her time shopping, she was paid an allowance to
stay with me, and Ricardo had given her full reign over a credit
card. We hardly talked, opting for early bedtimes instead of
discussing anything.
The guys were busy getting ready for the tour themselves,
plugging it and working out for it, they'd done it so many times,
I suppose it was just like habit for them now.
"Come on Riyan, up and at them" Marcus smiled as he
clapped his hands.
I smiled to myself, he was a little eccentric, but definitely a
good choreographer, I owed a lot to him.
I had danced when I was younger, but hardly to this extreme, my
Grandmother had taught me most things, from the Salsa to the age
old "dance of love", but this was a lot more rigid, a
lot more practiced, and to me, definitely a lot harder.
Belle had spent a lot of time cheering me on, she was an
incredibly nice person, with a topic of conversation for
everyday. She told me she got bored with watching Nick practice,
that's why she came to see me, I suppose I should take that as a
compliment.
"Alright that's enough work" Nick chanted as he paraded
into the room
"Nickolas" Marcus scolded, his hand firmly on his hips.
"We gotta a job to do, step aside" AJ announced as he
followed Nick, toward me.
With a quick tug, Nick pulled me up into the air and flung me
over his shoulder.
"The little one has a birthday to party for" he spoke
in a robot like voice
"But I've already had my birthday" I laughed
"Not Backstreet style you haven't" AJ replied as they
carried me out of the studio to an awaiting limo
"But, I have so much to do" I sighed
"All work and no play makes Riyan a very dull girl"
Nick spoke, pointing his finger at me
I sunk down into the seat, no sense in fighting it, plus I really
needed a break.
The 'Party" room of one of the flashest venues in the town
had been decorated in an array of balloons, streamers, and a huge
banner hung from one side to the other and simply read
"Happy Birthday Riyan".
"Happy Birthday Ri" Belle smiled, the first to come up
to me
"Why'd you all do this?" I laughed, blushing a little
at the attention.
"Because, we always care for our friends" Kevin
announced handing me a drink, non-alcoholic of course.
"Well thank you" I replied, taking a sip
My eye was drawn across the room to Alleah, she was standing with
Brian, her hand gently touching his side as they chatted away. It
seemed pretty obvious she'd locked onto a target, I pitied the
fool the ever got involved with the wild witch, in other words,
my cousin.
~ THE FIRST NIGHT OF THE TOUR ~
Dear
Diary
I don't think I can do this………I have never been
more scared before in my life. As I sit here writing this, in a
a-symetictrical snake-skin top and black leather pants, my hair
looking like I just woke up, and a face full of makeup I barely
recognize anymore, a crowd of people are filling into the arena,
its opening night, the first show of the entire tour, and the one
that I'm sure decides the fate of the rest. I hit the market
pretty quickly, my first song was released a week ago, its called
"Too Hot", I suppose it's like a poppy kinda song, much
like the rest of them. I wanted to come out a bit different, but
I was informed that's really the only market right now, and as I
become more "grounded" into the industry I can start
making a more original sound……all of which made sense,
and anyway there was a difference to me, I wasn't blond, he-he.
I've pasted a copy of the lyrics of my debut single to the other
page, who knows maybe I'll be pasting the songs I've written in
here someday - maybe someday soon.
It's getting closer to time now, and I've never wanted to run
away more in my life, I'm so scared, all those people, all those
eyes. But this is it, this is the moment of truth I suppose, this
will decide everything……why? Simply because those
people out there, don't know me personally and if I suck, they
will have no problem booing me off the stage, they are the
audience, the only ones that will give you the truth, I just hope
I can handle the truth.
"Are you ready Ri?" Howie smiled touching my shoulder
I looked up, and nodded slightly, though I was on the verge of
tears.
I have
to go now. I know I say this a lot………but, wish me
luck.
Riyan
I placed the pen and scrapbook into my bag and stood.
"Everything OK Ri? You look like you've seen a ghost"
Brian smiled as he and the others walked up to me
"I, I, I, I'm gonna be sick" I announced running into
the toilet across the hall.
I'd hardly eaten anything all day, but somehow I managed to empty
my stomach in one foul go. I flushed the toilet and wiped my
mouth, I was shaking uncontrollably as I leant up against the
wall.
"I can't do this" I announced, wiping a nervous tear
from my eye as I walked out of the toilet
"Riyan, you can do anything you put your heart to"
Kevin spoke firmly
"No, see that's the point, I cant, I cant do this, I'm
sorry, I failed" I sniffed
"Riyan, remember your crowd?" Brian piped in
"Yeah"
"That's them, they're out there waiting for you"
"No, they're waiting for YOU"
"Not if you imagine they're for you. Go to a place that
makes you feel good Riyan" he spoke softly
I closed my eyes, imagined a field with no one around me, the
tall grass shielding me form everyone.
"Are you there?"
I nodded slowly
"Where?"
"A field, no one around" I whispered, my eyes still
closed
"Then imagine those people out there are the blades of grass
around you, and sing to them" he concluded
"You think I can do it?"
"Riyan, I know you can"
I breathed in softly, over come with a sense of been at peace,
that I'd never felt before. The rest of the night was like a
complete haze, I know I went out there, I know I sung, but I was
so far in the clouds, I was afraid to come down. it was truly
like I was walking on air, for once in my life I realized
something - I could do this, I'd found "my calling" and
it was then and there, lying in the bed of my hotel room, I knew
that I would never be the same again, that no matter what, I
would hold onto this with both hands, and never let it go. Deep
down, I knew it was my destiny.