Sat on her tuffet
Eating her curds and whey
Along came a spider
That sat down beside her
And frightened Miss Muffet away
To find out the meaning to this one, I had to research very hard. Firstly, I found out that a tuffet was actually a little mound, a little smaller but with a higher incline than a mound.
Secondly, believe it or not, this Nursery rhyme actually started out as a CIA file report. No, really! I can explain! A spy who was code-named Miss Muffet, happened to be on lookout duty in the late sixties (during the Cold War) and was brandishing 'his' (it was changed to her to protect his identity on the files, but my research has shown it to be a man), anyway, he was brandishing his new weapon, developed by the Russian defect Kurdstovesky and Chinese genious Way Lun Chan, thus the weapon, in the tradition of Smith And Wesson, was known as Kurdstovesky and Way, shortened to Curds and Whey when the obvious was pointed out to the makers. The eating part came to the fact that the weapon had a site barrel that was so designed that the rest of the weapon seemed to hide the face, and looked like a person was attempting to eat it. It became a standard joke. Ha.
However, the weapon had one flaw. Because you had to spend so much of your
attention concentrating on the site gauge, it was easy to become ignorant of your immediate whereabouts. Therefore, Miss Muffet did not notice the russian spy, Dolstov Rustevic, otherwise known on CIA charts as Spy D.R., who, knowing that the American government knew he was a spy, and knowing the limits of the Curds and Whey weapon, decided to sneak up on Miss Muffet, plonk himself down and say casually, "Hello!" Miss Muffet, strung to tension at the importance of the event he was at anyway, accidentally squeezed the trigger, and let off a shot. When he realised what he had done, he quickly evacuated the scene before realising the grave repurcussions of his actions.
Yes, that's right, by total error in judgement, Miss Muffet was actually the second gunman at the grassy knoll.