10:00 am

I have my independence back. I am now able to do all I need to function adequately in my ‘new life’. I no longer rely on Bling for everything the way I used to. I have more than enough strength to take care of myself physically, and I have made the necessary adjustments to my apartment and car to accommodate the wheelchair. I can go almost anywhere I want and do almost anything I want.

Bling has even moved out recently. There is no reason for him to spend all his time here, so now I only see him during our evening training sessions. He has even picked up some new clients during the day. This arrangement works well for both of us. By the time he arrives here at 8:00pm, I’m tired enough of the hacking game that I’m ready to hit the weights for a few hours. It works for Bling as well because not too many of his other clients want to work out at nine o’clock at night.

I could settle into this new routine of Eyes Only work and rehab sessions, but this is what scares me the most, that this might be my life from now on. I look forward to having Bling back tonight for another session. I appreciate the hope he gives me that things will eventually change.

Still, I can’t help being concerned. This week, for the first time, I haven’t made much progress. Bling says I have reached a plateau. My body needs some time to adapt to my new level of fitness prior to progressing again. He says it’s a normal part of any fitness program. He has an explanation for everything.

Maybe if I push myself harder, I can work through this plateau a little faster. I know that I will push Bling to do extra sets during our session tonight, and I already know that he will turn me down. I can even hear his words. "You can’t do this all at once. You gotta pace yourself, man. Otherwise you’ll burn out." I doubt very much that I will burn out. I’ve worked hard for years and it hasn’t hurt me.

Then there is Bling’s favorite motto, "Patience in all things". Sometimes I hate him for giving me hope, but then making me wait. I don’t have a lot of capacity for patience right now. I feel like I am in a race against time. I can see that my leg muscles have atrophied significantly. Soon I will be able to circle my thighs with my hands. I am afraid that the longer I stay in this chair, the harder it will be to get out. Yet Bling seems unfazed by this. He has me doing more visualization work during our rehab sessions, ‘feeling’ the contractions as he moves my legs. He is confident that I will walk again and I can’t help believing him. Everything he tells me, he believes so strongly. So I will continue to push myself and to push Bling.

11:00 pm

Max completed her first job for me today. We spent a lot of time planning the details during the last two weeks and it went off without a hitch. Once we got started, Max’s eyes were on fire. This is what she has been trained to do and she jumped at the opportunity to use her stuff. We were in perfect sync as we poured over our plans, her skills perfectly complementing mine.

Even after only one job, I know that Max is the best partner I have ever had or ever will have. But the best part for me was just having her around, seeing the fire in her eyes and hearing her acid tongue. I never know what she is going to say or do next. Then I’d look up from our work and see the most breathtakingly beautiful face I have ever seen. She brought an enthusiasm and a light into this apartment that I have never seen before.

Max walked in tonight at the tail end of my session with Bling. That fire was back in her eyes as she dumped a wad of cash on the training table. She took off with Joel Solinsky’s money and let him and his buddies shoot each other.

"Put three dirt bags in a room and money disappears. Tempers flare. Guns are drawn. Three dead dirt bags." She said in amusement, as if this was all in a day’s work for her. Gotta love this girl! She pitted them against each other and let their nasty natures take over.

I couldn’t believe the energy that was pouring off her tonight. She must get a bigger rush from going out in the field than I anticipated. While she was talking to me about Solinsky and his victims, her eyes were burning holes right through me. I couldn’t even look back at her. I moved away, but I could still feel her eyes drilling through my back. What was that?

In a second, the fire changed and she was giving me a hard time about her brother, Zack, pushing me to give her some information. This girl has even less patience than I do. I couldn’t help but repeat my favorite Blingism to her. "Patience in all things. Right?" But she didn’t buy it for a second. The truth is, she has no idea how much time I have been putting into this. Outside of Solinsky, it is the only thing I have worked on the last two weeks. I really don’t want to disappoint her after everything she has already done for me. But now is not soon enough for Max. Five minutes later, she was walking out the door, still challenging me to come up with something for her. She blew out of here with the same energy and intensity with which she came in. Leaving me to try and comprehend what just happened.

Fire in her eyes

The flame of life

Burning with intensity

Consuming all in her path