11:30 pm

As expected, Max brought Tinga and her family back here. Fogle Towers, refuge for embattled X5s. It’s nothing new to me. Yet, there is something about this situation that is hitting closer to home than usual. I never thought I would meet an X5 with a husband and child. It appears that Tinga almost succeeded in having the normal life that Max seems to crave. But now everything has fallen apart for her. I’ve been watching her repeatedly reach out to her husband, only to have him pull away.

"How’s the happy couple?" I asked Max cynically as we watched Charlie walk away from Tinga one more time. They are obviously anything but happy. How could Tinga not tell Charlie what she is? How could she raise a child with him and not find five minutes one day to let him know what he has gotten into with her?

"They’ll get over it," Max said matter-of-factly, expecting Charlie to set everything behind him and just move on. She doesn’t realize that it’s not that easy. How can Tinga expect Charlie to trust her when she can’t even share the most fundamental facts about her life with him? He had a right to know what he was getting into and she took that right away. I said as much to Max, but she didn’t accept my argument for a minute.

Max is right, of course. You can never really know what you’re getting into with a relationship. You may think that you know a person. You may think that you understand who they are, but you will never truly know them until you are completely involved. I certainly learned that with Daphne and Val. I thought I knew what I was getting into, but I had no clue. There is no reason to think that my relationship with Max is any different. What was I doing seeking assurances from her? What did I expect her to say? There won’t be any unforeseeable obstacles? Nothing will ever split us apart? Or how about this one… We’ll live happily ever after.

Come on! We’re not even together. It doesn’t matter how much I care about her. Considering our circumstances, I know our prospects aren’t good. I’ve got the happy couple in my living room to prove that. When we discovered that Jace was in a family way, I found it almost amusing, but I realize now that there is nothing funny about it. Tinga’s situation has literally brought that home for me. Two X5s, two relationships, two children, two life threatening situations. Running for you life is not conducive to cozy domesticity. For once, I can almost agree with Zack. Given what has happened, the futility of an X5 attempting to have a family is not lost on me.

Yet, these so-called soldiers continue to seek love and companionship. Not even years of Manticore programming can erase their desire for a family. Their situation may be more extreme, but it parallels what all of us face. Relationships are fraught with challenges and, more often than not, they fail. It’s unrealistic to expect anything more.

So the question becomes, despite the potential for failure, do you still take the risk?