Which one: Mad King Van Genre: High Fantasy
Married: several times, all dead Children: dozens, most dead or exiled
Era: fantasy past Lifespan: clearly immortal
Dragon: none yet Type: n/a
Bonded at: Jiyuu Dragonstake, Chess Clutch Pets: none
Sexual Type: unexpectedly tender, bisexual Relatives: none
Nemesis: Himself Allies: none
Occupation: Sovereign lord of his kingdom, crazy lunatic, biomage (study of body magic) Powers and Abilities: immortality, innate self-magic use, spellcasting, devious logic, insane laughter
Prefered weapons: yes. Weaknesses: not only insane like a Sanger, but insane like, nuts, crazy. Unhinged. Sporadically violent but often just weird. He's also cursed.
Song: "Within You" Labyrinth Soundtrack, David Bowie  
 

He was much taller than anyone around him. His subjects were just regular people, after all. Farmers and tailors and soldiers. They didn't really need soldiers in his kingdom, because ... Well, because Mad King Van was all they really needed. He seemed to have senses that extended to the border and beyond, eyes that flew to him on invisible wings, ears that listened behind every door.

The city itself was paranoid as hell. Why wouldn't they be? They never quite knew when their immortal lord would go off on some crusade or tirade. They never knew when his enemies would try to strike. And how could he make enemies? He never left his keep, that they knew of.

He did leave, of course, but they wouldn't see him do it. He would seal himself off into a chamber now and again, perhaps once every ten or twelve years, and perform certain rituals. It transformed some nearby piece of meat - a guard for instance, or literally a slab of dead meat meant for the kitchens - into a doppleganger of himself that would last for approximately one week.

In that time, the havoc that he could wreak was tremendous. He would travel far and wide, teleporting or scrying in arcane ways. Sometimes he would use a mirror that had been stolen from its owner almost two thousand years before - by him - and sometimes he would take a nice plain horse.

He liked horses. That itself was something a little mad, because only a couple Sangers could stomach the smelly sweaty beasts. He liked these though, because he had had a hand in their creation. A team of horses once was left in his path while he was summoning or fighting in some magical way. And when the fight was over, or whatever it was he'd done (no one was sure, this was a thousand years ago), the eight steeds had been transformed into gigantic black beasts with shining fur and sharp metal hooves. Their hooves would spark the paved street stones, sometimes cause fires.

He liked that too.

They were apparently both immortal and fertile. Though only once in a while would a mare be willing to allow one of the stallions to mount her, and only once in a great while would a normal stud come to play with the females in the courtyard of the Mad King.

The steeds, like their king, roamed where they would. No one got in their way, that would be deadly. But by now most of the people living in their proximity had gotten used to their clatter across the streets, and they simply ignored them. A newcomer to the place could always be spotted as they ran or stared.

The people of this kingdom without a name were hardly humble. However, they also rarely were called upon to be warriors. Even more rarely, were they required to do anything for their king. He did tax them. Sometimes, in fact, he would tax them outrageously. But then everyone knew, history would show, that in about twenty odd years, everything would go back to normal.

Besides, he kept the weather stable, no flooding (since that one time in the 1200's) and hardly ever a drought (except a couple in the 1600's and 1800's). Crops were always plentiful (unless you count the various fires started by the steeds, the occasional invasion that tromp through the fields, the magical battles that blackened the land for miles, and that big locust invasion in 1420), and in general life was normal in this kingdom.

And normal fare included the occasional group of idiots who thought they could steal back some treasure that had gone missing from their own land's coffer. About every fifteen or twenty years in fact, like clockwork, there would be some idiotic group of intrepid adventurers who would come to town, looking for a place to stay while they worked out how they'd break into the Keep.

A family line of innkeepers had stories to tell about these many groups. In fact Mad King Van had comissioned them as scribes of such events, because the groups would habitually stay at their inn. It was a position of some importance, and the family always appreciated it.

Sometimes they would try to run away and hide from their duty, but in any case, most of the time, they recorded events and were rewarded. It was just that getting the reward often meant some minor family disaster. The time he wanted to take the innkeeper's daughter as a wife, that was bad.

It was always bad when he tried to take a wife. Because for all his power, his handsome looks, his grace, and magical prowess? Mad King Van was still cursed to walk the world alone and sad. He had sired sons and daughters, certainly. He had raped and taken women of the town in madness. Those were the lucky women, in fact. Because certainly the ones he fell in love with were the ones which fate handed the most cruel turns.

Dying in childbirth. Family burnt in a freak firestorm. Afflicted by boils. Mauled by rampaging wildlife. Any thing that would eventually take his love from him in some horrific manner - they'd all happened. It was one of the things that the township just didn't talk about. It wasn't worth the trouble. And it was always very very sad.

These days, Van had gone out and apparently come back with a tapestry that showed something mysterious. No one in the town knew quite what it was that you could see by looking at this thing - none of them had tried asking to see it. Who would dare? It was unclear in fact how rumors started about his exploits at all, since there only seemed to be about a dozen people working in the keep at any time, and most of them were cooks, maids or stable hands.

Terrified stable hands.

This time though, word had gotten around. It had gotten so far around that it made it back to the kingdom which had comissioned this piece of cloth. Enchanted items were becoming rare, because too many young mages had got it into their heads to come to this kingdom to "prove themselves". And they wound up dead, naturally, because Mad King Van was immortal, insane, and more powerful than any living mage had ever been.

He was not more powerful than the gods, apparently. But that wasn't something that either the group of men and women coming to retrieve the tapestry knew, or could affect.

Unless he fell in love. And that was a long shot - they didn't plan on being in town long enough for that.

Little did they know.

"I don't know, it's awfully steep," the thief said. She looked at the sheer wall of the keep, which was in fact set in the tall cliff mountainside overlooking the town. The keep was well known as impossible to breech.

It had been breeched. Five thousand eight hundred and sixty two years before.

By Mad Van. Before he took the kingship for himself. They didn't know that. And plus, the rock face that he sheered off in the process of gaining entry (the big piece of it was still laying on the ground underneath) no longer looked so visible. It had weathered nicely, blending in. He didn't want anyone getting any ideas after all.

If only they could put two and two together... That gigantic slab of stone upon which the town square was now built? Right below the big rectangular 'clean spot' on the cliffside? Hello?

The girl whose expertise was surveying overhead and climbing walls to gain entry to second stories shook her head. "It's too steep, guys. No way."

"You haven't tried it," sang the mercenary. He was tall, broad shouldered, and annoying as hell. He sang half the time, though his voice wasn't bad it was that he didn't seem to know too many tunes. "You don't know if you don't try it!"

"Fine," the blond haired girl snarled, "you do it." She stood up and turned sharply, muttering a string of words below her breath, "sheer rock face idiot no one climbs straight up without attracting attention but nooohono, no, I can do it because I'm a little yellow-haired goddess, idiot mercenary, freaking idiot who does he think he is telling me my business he can just--"

"Adae," said a soft voice, it was the tall mage in training Oraldo. He was usually able to calm their bad tempered thief. "I know you don't like Dag, but he's the best we could get on short notice. After..."

Her bright green teal eyes met his dark brown, and they shared a silent moment mourning the loss of their burly fighting companion. "I know but... He's such an idiot."

"I know he is. But at least he can cook." Oraldo tried to coax a smile out of their thief. It worked, this time.

"Don't even bring up food," Adae chuckled, "I don't even want to remember that. No matter what they say, Ogres can't cook properly for humans."

"Nope." They shared a little bit of silence, not heated. "Dag's an idiot. ...But he has a bit of a point," Oraldo remained just out of Adae's reach, knowing that her temper could break and she would suddenly swing at him. She had quite a hard little fist. "I mean, we have faith in your abilities."

"There's a huge difference," Adae said, looking up at the rock wall, "between able and miracle." She sighed, and Oraldo dared to place a hand on her shoulder. It wasn't shrugged off, so he remained closer. "I can't climb that. That's just crazy."

"Well..." Oraldo said, looking up and talking without thinking. "Maybe you're right. Maybe it's impossible. There'd be no way you could get halfway up that, really."

When Adae tensed up a bit, Oraldo knew that he'd made a terrible error. "I - I meant, I didn't mean to say that - I -"

"I know what you meant," Adae spat, and turned on her heel. Her braid of flaxen hair swung behind her, as she slammed the door to the rooftop entrance at the inn.

The shorter and burlier medic-fighter Bendek stood up and leaned against his mage friend. "Well that did it. She won't come out for another day. Good job."

"Hey - " Oraldo said, "I was trying to get her to meet the challenge."

"You blew it, then," Bendek muttered. "You know how she gets. She misses the subtle things. And maybe you were a little too subtle. You want to challenge her, you tell her 'I dare you to climb that'."

"Then why don't you do it, Bendek?" Hissed the mage, at his wits end. Dag was humming to himself sitting on the edge of the roof top cafe, admiring the city. "And shut up for a minute! I can't even hear myself think!"

Then Oraldo too swung himself around and slammed back into the inn. Bendek waited a moment, and then grinned to himself, and sat back down next to Dag.

"Sire?" Asked a timid voice. When there was no response, he asked again, "Sire? I bring news."

Van's hand moved and the guard saw it, he was addressing his king who was sitting in a large high-backed chair, and all the guard could see was Van's rich black hair and one shoulder. Apparently the king was not asleep before the fire, as the guard had first thought.

"I'm listening," the king said. His voice was deep, soft, and faintly bemused for some reason.

The guard hoped that it wasn't because he was plotting some bizarre end for him.

"There is word from the inkeeper, he says that there is another group. Smaller than the last one, but they seem decently competant."

"I dare say they are," Mad King Van said with a chuckle. "They want their tapestry back. As they should."

"Well, sire, did you want me to ... do anything about this?"

"No, no," Van stood, and again the guard was reminded that no matter what they said, he just wasn't human. Their king was head and shoulders bigger than all the rest. And his presence was somewhat intimidating. He cared little for fineries such as ... clothing. He liked silks and that was what mainly got imported. The only reason that their kingdom had relations with anyone else was to bring decent cloth in. Apart from the occasional robe or suit, though, Mad King Van wasn't much for wearing anything. Leather and silk - the guard gulped back a bit of a gasp when he realized that this time he was in fact wearing something. A loincloth-girdle thing of some kind. And he wondered briefly at who had to do the measuring for such things.

That would either be an honor or extremely dangerous or both. Probably both.

"Once you're finished staring at me," the king said with a smirk crossing one half of his face, "you could have one of the spies keep track of the group. But otherwise don't interrupt them. If I tell you to mobilize, then you will. I would like to see them try getting this thing back."

He thumbed at the big dark tapestry which hung on the wall next to the big hearth. In the shaky light though, the guard couldn't quite make anything coherent out in the weave.

"What does it do, sire?" He asked, tentative.

"It's showing me those who desire it. Up here," he pointed to the top left, "the king and queen of ... where was it I stole this from? Ah - Nelband. The daughter, she wants it because it would show her her lover. The boys here," he indicated the lower section, "are the mages who imbued it and they're trying to figure out a way to break the enchantment without being near it."

"What about the group of adventurers?" The guard asked, peering closer now.

"They're off to this side, they do not quite know exactly enough details to want it precisely. They will probably fumble around in the treasury if they make it that far." Mad King Van looked at his guard, and tilted his head oddly, "do you have any idea how many tapestries are hung in this keep?"

The guard shook his head, slowly.

"Four hundred and twelve, this makes four thirteen. I wonder if I should put it among the others, just to make it harder..." He pondered for a moment, but then merely smiled at himself and with a nod, dismissed the guard. Before the man was out of sight, though, Van called out, "and let the Steeds have their run tonight. They could use a little exersize." He heard the guard acknowledge this, and also heard the muttered 'so that's what he'll do' as he turned a corner.

Instead of leaving the room, Van sized up the tapestry again. Once per day, it seemed, it could be commanded to display things as requested. Van wasn't sure if it was one time in twenty four hours, or once before midnight and then it refreshed, or what. He had time, he'd sit up through the night watching it.

But first, to get a couple more tapestries in here. The enchanted ones. They were fun to play with. One he had, was able to stiffen and become hard as stone - handy in a fight, certainly. Another glimmered with daylight sewn into every golden thread and moonlight into every silver. It was annoying, because it was way too bright for Van's sensitive eyes.

Another had birds that chirped and a brook that made soft noises, woven into it. Perhaps that one would be a pleasant companion to the new arrival. Van briefly concentrated and summoned it and several others with a wave of his long arms.

He unrolled them one by one, and each he placed with a magical flourish onto the tall stone walls. A couple dangled into the middle of the room from the wide ceiling, different from every angle they could be viewed. He moved the new one to the left side of the hearth, and put the bird-brook one where it had been. The enchantment faded after an hour or more, so Van watched the men and women who desired this tapestry as they fretted about their lives.

He himself wasn't even on it. Well, yes, he was - there down in the left hand corner, about a handspan wide and tall. Not much compared to anyone else, really. Grinning, he left the room as the tapestry faded to a rich royal blue and navy colored pattern.

"It's a well-defended place," Dag commented when he met back up with the group. Adae had calmed herself, and Oraldo had apologized, Bendek was on the prowl for some supplies, and Dag wasn't even humming. Maybe that meant he was getting down to business.

"Yes, but it does have weaknesses," said Adae. "There are deliveries, the stables are open air, and there don't appear to be any guards on the walls."

Dag nodded. He'd been actually mapping the city from their rooftop cafe, he had a gift for it - mentally recording ups and downs, streets, and then later on he seemed quite happy to draw it out on a sheet of paper that he had taken from the mage's spare folder. At first Oraldo was furious with him for even touching his things, but when he saw the brilliance that the otherwise dull merc showed in topography and cartography, why... He acted as though he'd been the one to have taught him everything he knew...

"Here and here," Dag pointed out two parapets with guards - they were on distant corners from the castle entrance, but they had a strong clear view. "Their view overlaps here," he indicated a swath, "but there are gaps because of the heights of the buildings here and here," again there were little notations - higher, lower. "If you had taken the time I did, you would know that there are guards, and they change every four hours." He glanced at Adae with a smile, "and there is a weakness then."

"I don't know about calling twice the number of guards with weapons out a weakness..." She muttered. "I've been caught in a guard change before. It's not pretty."

"So have I, and no it is not pretty - it is glorious." Dag said. "But these do not appear to be very aggressive."

"I wonder why," Oraldo said quietly. "I mean, the city's been attacked several times in the last decade, right?"

"Four, yes," Dag said. "But all unsuccessful."

"Why then?"

They pondered this in their large suite. By the time Bendek got back with armloads of items and goods, they had worked out a rudamentary plan to infiltrate the lowest level of the castle's grounds. Bendek refilled canisters with water and ointment, added powder to one salve to make a bright yellow paste, and watched what they were doing from his own table.

"The city is old, but it's been almost exactly the same for the last five thousand years. It's expanded twice," Dag said, showing where old city walls had once stood. "And at those wall points there are also probably ways to get into the castle."

"How do you figure?" Oraldo asked, "wouldn't they be long closed off?"

"If you wanted to get guards to the middle of the new town, quickly, wouldn't you leave them open?" Dag said.

Even Adae was begining to appreciate the savant of his abilities. He wasn't much as a person goes, but as a tactician? Dag seemed to know what he was talking about.

"So assume they are open, won't that leave us vulnerable? They could surround us if we're on our way in or out," Adae said. She seemed quite uncomfortable with this idea.

"Tonight we should count the guards," Dag suggested.

"Our employers the king and queen would like their tapestry back soon, Dag," Bendek reminded them.

"If they want it at all, we're going to need time," Oraldo said. "He's right. Better that we know the odds, and not rush in."

So that night, preparing to view the castle from their rooftop, they got a bit more of a show than they had planned.

The Steeds were let out at dusk - which meant that the towering sheer cliff rock face that loomed over the northern side of the city was illuminated brilliantly with sunset and somewhat blinded the group. But as the sun dimmed, and the blanket of stars crept overhead? Stars formed on the streets. At first, it was the lamps and candles of people's homes and businesses like the taverns which remained open all night. But then...

"What is that noise?" Asked Adae. The others came to her side and listened, and Dag was the one who first saw them.

"Dark - look at them, they're huge!" He said. The steeds had been led - well, they'd been escorted by armed guards (Dag counted the guards, adding four more to their tally) - up to the wide gate entrance of the courtyard. Then the gate was opened, and lights on the streets went out abruptly. Apparently the town knew when this was to take place.

That, or it was the snorting and pawing of the cobblestones, the sheer size of these horses would put the biggest Shire to shame. But it wasn't just that... Their manes seemed to glow faintly, even from the distance the group was seeing them. Their eyes too gave off an eerie catlike yellow glimmer.

It was the pounding of their sharp metal hooves across the cobblestones that produced showers of bright white sparks. There were twelve of these beasts let out tonight, Dag didn't know how many more there might have been, but even he was standing in awe as they passed around the streets. They illuminated the street as they ran past - though they made little sound than their heavy breathing and snorting. They weren't completely unearthly after all.

But they were huge. And scary. Not one person was out on the street when the group looked. They had two spy glasses, which were passed between them regularly, and with them they saw that the biggest stallion of this group of steeds could see into second story homes windows.

Shortly after the steeds had their run through the place, they returned to the castle. And life on the streets of this town got back to a more normal pace. Just like clockwork? Except that there wasn't a good regular schedule for things.

"I don't want to cross them," Bendek announced with a grunt.

"We might have to," Dag said. "They are housed right next to the courtyard, and between them and the kitchens is the best entrance."

They all let that stew around in their heads, and then they went back to counting guards and comparing notes.

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