Disclaimer:  All the characters that you recognize belong to Laurell K Hamilton.  Those that you don’t would belong to me so back off.  :oP  And if you don’t like the story that’s okay the back button is right up there ^^^^^^.  Thanks for your patronage.  Angelfangs

Rating: Still R, I will tell you when and if it changes

Author’s Note:  This is set just after NIC, sorry for not clearing that up earlier.  Now without further ado…..

Chapter 3

 

I don’t know how long I was out there.  I just know that the sun was beating down unmercifully on me. Making my normally pale white skin red.  I was gonna have one hell of a sunburn whenever I decided to move.  Now what do I do, I thought miserably. 

 

Well I’m not going to stay where I’m obviously not wanted.  I picked up my cigarettes and matches and went into the house. It was quiet as a graveyard.  I picked up my brush up from the coffee table where Caleb had left it when I went to get a pair of pants.  I went to the bedroom I had been in last night  picked up my bra off the floor, and put it on.  Nathaniel was still sleeping peacefully in the bed, I decided not to disturb him and went back to the living room. 

 

On a whim I decided to change shirts. I pulled out a Triple H baby doll tee shirt, which read ‘That Damn Good’.  Yeah I liked the WWE, so sue me.  I looked around the living room there wasn’t a sound except that of the quiet hum of the air conditioner.  If I concentrated, I could actually hear Nathaniel’s deep even breathing coming from the room we had shared last night down the hallway.  I quickly changed shirts. Dropping the one I had been wearing yesterday into my gym bag along with my hairbrush. 

 

I debated whether or not to leave a note. I decided since Anita had been kind enough to offer me the hospitality of her home, the least I could do was leave her a note.  I jotted down that I had left and that I didn’t know where I was going, so I couldn’t leave her a number to reach me.  When I found somewhere to stay I would let her know.  I signed it and left it by the answering machine in the kitchen. 

 

As I was getting ready to actually leave, I heard Nathaniel getting up.  I stood at the front door unsure of what to do now.  I had made up my mind that I was leaving, but I couldn’t just walk out.  I wasn’t brought up that way.  I went back into the kitchen, and got the note I had left for Anita, and came back to the living room and waited for Nathaniel to finish in the bathroom.  I didn’t have to wait long, he appeared in the doorway momentarily. And I gave him the note and told him to give it to Anita and only Anita.  He nodded and I went for the door, “Where are you going to go,” he asked timidly.

 

“Out,” came my terse reply.  I wasn’t mad at him and told him as much.  “I just need to get out of here for a while, okay?” I said somewhat hesitantly.  He nodded his head, but he still looked like he had managed to do something wrong.  I went over to him and hugged him.  I told him that he had been more than kind and that I appreciated more than he knew.  But I still needed to leave.  I made sure that he would give the note only to Anita and walked out the front door.  My eyes were burning with the need to cry, so I didn’t look back.  I couldn’t if I looked back I was sure I would see Nathaniel watching me leave, and I knew that he still thought it was his fault that I was leaving.  And if he were crying, I wouldn’t be able to leave.  I squared my shoulders and kept walking.  It felt like my heart was breaking and it was hard to breathe. If this was how it felt to leave and I barely knew Nathaniel, then how could husbands leave their wives?

 

I didn’t know where I was going, but I had to get away from that house where I was unwelcome.  Anita and Nathaniel may have wanted me to stay, but two against a whole pard were nothing and I wouldn’t ask them to choose it was unfair.  I strived to be a fair person. I didn’t always manage, but at least I tried.

 

Damn! It was hot out, I thought. The oppressive heat and the humidity combined to make me feel like I had been walking for days instead of the hour and a half it actually was.  I looked at my watch for the first time since I left the house, it was 2:30pm.  My stomach chose that moment to demand food.  I grimaced and looked around me. I was by some sort of strip mall. There was a Mickey D’s ahead and I  walked in that direction.

 

I walked in and the sweat that had been rolling down my back instantly gelled.  It felt wonderful. I walked up to the counter, placed my order, and waited for it to come.  With my food in hand I walked to a corner table that gave me a view all the doors in the place, while at the same time placed a solid wall at my back.  Which turned out to be a good thing.  I watched a young man walk in he was about twenty-something. I wouldn’t have thought anything of it except he seemed to walk in his own cloud of energy.  He was about six foot five, with a shaved head. His face was all angles and planes, but some turn of the jaw saved him from being ugly.   He had full sensual lips, the kind that I could never deny kissing. If his tan was any indication, he appeared to be Hispanic. He was wearing baggy blue jeans and a white tank top that showed off his slender arms. They were well muscled, even if they weren’t big.  I couldn’t tell what color his eyes were though and for some reason that bugged me.  I felt like I should know who he was, but couldn’t remember ever meeting him before.

 

With fear now beginning to flow like water in my veins, I picked up my bag and purse. Ready to make a quick exit if need be.  My food forgotten, I stood and watched the man, now at the counter.  My brain screamed run and I did.  I didn’t question it. I could feel something, it was indescribable, but totally unpleasant.  I wanted to be as far away from him as I could get, and fast.  I hurried down the street, not sure where I was going but needing to get away from that restaurant. 

 

Who should be walking down the street, but Caleb and Micah.  I didn’t know if they already knew I had left the house or not, but I was not taking any chances. I ducked into the nearest store.  It turned out to be a sporting goods shop.  It had a wide variety of fishing and hunting supplies.  The man behind the counter was about fifty if he was a day.  He looked me over and shot me a rather dubious look, like a female had no business in here.  I walked up to the counter and asked the man what I needed for a concealed carry, permit in this state.

 

He looked surprised by my question.  I guess he didn’t get many females asking him that.  His face scrunched up, showing obvious distaste for the question.  I felt my face drain of all emotion and shut down.  I had only used that face one time before, with my Uncle Steve.  He had been trying to make me feel bad about something or other I really don’t remember what it was.  What I do remember was his reaction to that face. He was horrified that I could look at him without an ounce of any kind of emotion.

      

Wait, where the hell did that come from?  These memories of my life always left me feeling slightly unbalanced. If there was one thing I didn’t need right now it was to feel like I was coming unglued.  I quickly regrouped and set my face as I turned to the shop clerk.  He had white gray hair, pale blue eyes, beard stubble covering his jaw, and sagging jowls.  What I could see of him, was a khaki colored shirt with a white tee shirt undershirt.  The top two buttons had been left undone, which is why I knew the color of his undershirt.  He seemed to study me, I waited as patiently as I could.  Finally, he told me I would need to apply for the permit before I bought the gun, and I could apply for the permit at the store rather than going to the police department. As long as I had no criminal history, I would probably be granted my permit.  I would also need ten dollars for said permit. 

 

He asked what kind of gun I wanted.  I told him I would like something for personal protection, with a small grip.  He nodded and showed me a handgun display case, and pulled out a few all of them black.  The first one was a Browning .22 target pistol, the grip was right but the caliber was wrong. The only thing a .22 is good for is up close and personal, and I didn’t want to be up close and personal with whatever I was going to use it on.  The next was the gun, Anita had made famous, famous at least to me, a Browning 9mm. The grip was good and I knew from my reading that you didn’t have to be too close to use it for it to be effective.  The other was another 9mm of some kind or another, it didn’t impress me, when I picked it up, it just felt clunky and that was not a good thing in a firearm.  I picked up the Browning again and sighted it down my arm and the sight at the end of the barrel.  It just felt right.  I asked how much it was, he told me I nodded. 

 

I put my gym bag down, took off my purse and opened it, looking for my wallet.  Finally, finding it at the bottom of the black hole I call a purse.  I opened the wallet and noticed that I had hidden some money in it. Well that was good, the gun was going to cost me an arm and a leg. I have got to learn to plan to buy these things I tell myself. These little spur of the moment buys are gonna bankrupt me. I grimace at that thought.  I ask the man if I could use his phone real quick so that I might call my bank.  He turns the phone towards me and walks down the counter, for god only knows what.  I make the phone call. I’m surprised that I remember the number, but then again my mother always did say I had a gift for numbers.  Here we go again, I think to myself, another unbidden memory rises to the surface.  As I listen, I was surprised, again, at how much money I had in the bank.  Well it’s a good thing because this little shopping trip is going to cost me more then I’ll ever admit to.  I sighed, I didn’t want to spend that much money but I was not walking around unarmed anymore.  I replaced the phone in the cradle and looked up to find the clerk watching me.  I smiled that bright empty smile that means nothing, but everyone wears anyway. 

      

He came back down to where I was standing and asked if I was ready. I nodded, my meaningless smile still in place.  He told me to follow him and we walked towards the back of the store, into what looked like an office.  He asked me for my ID, Social Security card, and my birth certificate, which were on my person. I didn’t know why, but I was thankful that they were.  He turned to the computer, entered the information that he had before him and waited.  After about ten minutes I had my concealed carry permits, yes I said permits, at the last minute I had decided to take the .22 as well.  When he rang up the purchases, he looked at me and asked me if I was sure I would need all this.  I nodded.

 

I didn’t know if I would, but I wasn’t going to tell him that.  He helped me fit the shoulder holster rig and the small of the back holster.  I filled the clips of both with the ammunition that I had bought. No I hadn’t gone with the Glazer Safety rounds, I had gone with the Hollow point silver rounds.  If I was going to have to use them, I wanted them to make bigger holes going out then they did going in.    The clerk told me that I might want to add a sweatshirt or something to cover the guns, so that I didn’t make the good citizens of St. Louis run screaming into the night. 

 

Finishing up in the store, I thanked him and apologized for not even asking his name.  He smiled and said it was Hank, and we chatted for a bit about nothing. Then realizing that I was taking up his time, I said my good-bye thanked him again and left.  I looked at my watch and noticed that it was almost five o’clock. 

 

I hadn’t noticed that when I was in the store.  It was always like that for me whenever I was shopping.  I could go in there for one thing and not come out for hours.  I would have the thing I had gone in there to get, but I would also have hundreds of other bags as well.  Okay so maybe that was a slight exaggeration, but the idea was the same.

 

Walking down the street left me feeling slightly out of place, because I don’t know where the hell I was going, spotting a phone booth, I walked toward it.  Did you ever notice that all phone booths seem to be located at gas stations?  I wrinkled my nose. The smell of gas used to be a smell that while, not pleasant hadn’t made my stomach want to heave its contents either.  There were other smells as well. Some I didn’t even dare define, for fear I would be dry heaving.

 

Actually, what I was hoping to find is a phone book, so I could get a hotel room for at least one night.  Praying to God, I walked up to the phone booth.  Oh my goodness, He was listening. There was a phone book still in the nifty little gadget on the bottom of the phone booth.  Sending a silent prayer of thanks, I thumbed through the phone book looking for a Motel 6 or something like it.  Actually finding one, I called the number and was told that yes, they did have a vacancy and I could reserve it.  Pulling out my credit card, I gave the clerk the number and I was told that they would have the room prepared.  Hanging up, I called a cab company and gave them the address on the phone.

      

As I was waiting, I noticed a forest green Ford Explorer pull into the gas station. No biggie right? Right.  And who gets out, none other then the Hispanic that had been at the McDonald’s earlier today.  I feel my stomach drop. Quickly, I turn towards the phone booth, like I’m actually going to use it.  Watching him out of the corner of my eye, I see him standing in front of the pumps talking on a cell phone. He flipped it closed and went inside.  I didn’t know what to do. Did I stay and wait for the cab, or do I run like hell?  What do you think I did, I ran like hell. I didn’t know where I was going and I didn’t stop to ask directions.  I ran until I was out of breath and sweating profusely.  My legs were shaking badly, that was not a good sign, I might need to use them again.  I was tired and scared, that didn’t make a good combination. I was on edge because I didn’t know who that guy was and he seemed to pop up every where I went. 

      

I wasn’t in a good part of town. That I could tell by the amount of graffiti on the walls of the buildings closest to me.  I sighed. Why do I always end up in bad situations?  I smelled the air. It’s really easy, you just flare your nostrils out and inhale.  What it told me was not comforting.  I could smell at least half a dozen people on the street and I was betting not all of them were friendly.  Well I had no other choices at the moment, so I walked down the street like I owned it.  Hoping my attitude would discourage any would be assailants.  Either it worked, or these people knew what I was. Because nobody accosted me on my journey down the street.  After walking miles, well that’s what it felt like anyway, the neighborhood seemed to get better.  More tourist friendly at least. I’m guessing that I was in the district, aka Blood Square.

 

You wouldn’t believe the kind of luck I was having. It had gone from bad to worse.  I was standing a few blocks from Guilty Pleasures. Could my luck get any worse I thought sourly. Please nobody answer that.  What to do, what do to I thought.  Well cover me I’m going in. I sighed and headed in that direction.  Well at least it had a bar, I commented to myself, maybe I could drink myself stupid.  I waited in line and was let in after a brief hesitation by the bouncer at the door.  I went directly to the bar and ordered a shot of tequila, and told the bartender to leave the bottle. He looked at me funny but left the bottle.  The noise level in the room was worse than a rock concert. The screaming women weren’t helping.  Did I mention that I don’t like that kind of display?  It was all good if it was between two people, but for a group this size, what’s the point? 

 

What did focus my attention on the stage was a Faith No More song. I couldn’t recall the name of the song but I owned the album so I knew who was singing.  I looked up and saw Nathaniel. I turned back to the bar, hoping against hope that he hadn’t seen me.  That didn’t seem likely since he had kind of stumbled when I turned to look at the stage.  I couldn’t help myself, I turned back to the stage to see him slowly removing his shirt.  I gaped at him. I knew that he was a stripper and that he had to have a good looking body, but I wasn’t prepared for the sight of his naked chest. It was perfectly muscled and he had  six pack abs.  I watched as he removed his pants and danced around the stage. I was in a trance, watching him shake his stuff made me uncomfortable for all the obvious reasons.  I turned to face the bar this time firmly resolved to not look back at the stage.  I downed four shots rather quickly, motioned for the bartender, ordered an MGD and told him to take the tequila back.  When he came back with my beer, I paid him and was nursing the beer.  I could feel Nathaniel close by but resolved not to look until his set was finished. 

 

After about fifteen minutes, I felt Nathaniel walk up to the bar. He asked for a water and sat down next to me.  “What are you doing here,” he asked, his voice timid even though he had to practically yell to be heard.

 

“Would you believe, that I got lost?” I said with much embarrassment.

 

“Your joking, right?” he looked at me. Staring straight ahead I shook my head taking another drink of my beer.  “Anita went ape shit when I gave her the note. What the hell did you say to her?” his voice still quiet.

 

“I thanked her for her hospitality and told her I would let her know where I was when I got settled,” still not looking at him.  I tipped the bottle back, downed the rest of the beer, and motioned for another. The bartender got it, looked at me to see if I was drunk or not was my guess.  He gave me the beer finally, “Shit like that will not earn you a big tip from me,” I coolly informed the bartender.  He just shrugged his wide shoulders and went back to his duties.  I was staring at myself in the smoky mirror that seemed to back all bars. 

 

“Are you going to come home with me?”  Nathaniel asked, concern etched on his face

 

“Nope.”  I met his eyes in the mirror behind the bar.

 

“Why?”

 

“Not gonna stay where I’m not wanted.”

 

“I want you there,” he said so softly. If I hadn’t had enhanced hearing I would have missed it.

 

“You’re about the only one.” Still not looking directly at him.  Taking another huge mouthful of beer.  I frowned at the bottle. Empty again.  Well these things don’t seem to last very long I thought to myself.  Then another thought occurred to me; maybe I was already drunk. Oh shit.  What I don’t need is to be so far gone, that I don’t know what the hell is going on.  Then I thought wasn’t that what I came in here to do. Drink myself senseless, however, I decide against another drink.  The bartender came back and I asked for a water this time. He raised an eyebrow, but got my water.

 

“Caleb wants you to come home,” Nathaniel tries.

 

“That’s nice,” I said sarcastically. “Why don’t you call them and tell them all where I can be found?”  Nathaniel said nothing to that.  I meet his eyes again. Searchingly. He drops his gaze.  “You did. You told all of them where I was, didn’t you?” I asked angrily.  He nodded sadly and sighed.  He’s upset and I’m the cause, but I was so angry that I didn’t care, and that wasn’t like me.  “Why don’t you find somewhere else to sit Nathaniel?” I told him, my voice flat and unemotional.  He slowly got up and wandered back the way he had come.

 

Nothing to do now but wait for the cavalry to arrive I thought hotly.  I nursed my water while awaiting for Anita and the group to come.  I didn’t have long to ponder what I was going to do. About five minutes after Nathaniel left, I could feel Caleb coming and he was upset, to say the least.  Ha! Join the club.  

 

I could feel him like an angry storm at my back. Pretending to ignore him, I took a drink of water.  The tension in his body seemed to increase, making me just a tiny bit angrier myself.  I turn purposely away from him and stare down the bar at the bartender. He noticed me and brought another water with him.  Smiling, I thanked him, just to piss Caleb off.  It worked.

 

“What the fuck were you thinking to leave like that?” Anger colored every word.

 

“I was thinking, that I will not stay where I’m obviously not wanted,” my voice empty.

 

“What do you mean not wanted?”  Caleb said confused, rather than angry now.

 

“Well, what the hell!  Did you really think I would stay, when Micah made it clear that I was not wanted, when he left me out there on the patio without saying a word,” my words harsh because I was hurt.

      

“Luna, he left you out there, because he thought you weren’t ready to come in,” his voice soft.

      

“Well he sure could have fooled me, because I got the distinct impression that I was not wanted.” I said bitterly turning to face Caleb.

      

“That’s not what he meant,” he started.

 

“And just how the hell would you know what Micah meant, Caleb?  You weren’t there. Hell, you didn’t even come outside to tell me you guys were leaving. You just left.  Am I supposed to be some sort of mind reader? Because I didn’t take that course, so I don’t know what’s going on unless you tell me.”  My voice had risen with each word; I was poking his chest by the end of my little tirade. 

 

What he did next was so unexpected; he grabbed my right hand with his left and pulled me to his body, hard. I had enough time to think he’s going to kiss me.  Then his lips were covering mine.  His lips, teeth, and tongue pleaded with me to open my mouth.  I did and he ravaged my mouth. His tongue coaxing mine to dance with his and he pulled me closer. I could feel the hard line of his body.  My thoughts went to the wind.  I wound one arm around his shoulders and my other hand traveled up the back of his neck, to bury itself in his hair.  He ground himself into me and I knew his body, at least, was happy to have me there.  I groaned into his mouth. His hands traveled down my body coming to rest on my sensitive bottom. Pulling me harder into him.

 

We must have gotten pretty bad, because the next thing I heard was someone coughing right next to us.  That made us come up for air.  I glared at the intruder, it was Jason. He pointed over to where Anita, Micah and Merle were standing.  I sighed. Well looks like I was going back to the house anyway.  I picked up my gym bag, which I had dropped by the stool I had been sitting on, and put my purse on.  Caleb held my hand as we walked toward a very worried looking Anita.  She made a face when I was standing in front of her.  I mumbled an apology for the beer breath and searched my pockets looking for a breath mint, when something flashed in the corner of my eye.  I turned and looked. It was the Hispanic guy again. I must have paled visibly, because everyone was asking me what was wrong. I pointed in the direction I was still looking, he stood there arrogantly.  He tipped a beer bottle in salute to our little group, and mouthed the word, ‘gotcha’. 

 

No one moved.  I was frozen in place finally, I could place his name, Diego. I breathed the name.  Caleb wrapped a protective arm around my waist and was growling in his direction.  Anita was looking between the new guy and me.  I was terrified, I wanted to leave and I wanted to leave now.  Micah looked like he didn’t know what to do. Merle looked at me speculatively, like he knew something I didn’t.  I didn’t have time to consider that look. Anita was moving towards Diego. I whimpered.  This is not a good idea. Unless we could kill him, my mind screamed leave him the fuck alone.  I grabbed Anita’s arm and pleaded with my eyes for her to let this go.  Either sensing the same thing I had felt from him the last couple of times, or not wanting to distress me further, she backed off.  We were leaving, thank God. I breathed a sigh of relief.  Caleb grabbed my gym bag and we all started for the exit.  Keeping our eyes on Diego, like he might try something if we looked away too long. 

 

Nobody said anything on the way to Anita’s house.  My mind was full of questions that had no answers.  There were so many blanks in my mind that I began to wonder if I was an escapee from a mental institution.  But if I was questioning my sanity, didn’t that mean that I was not insane?  The jury was still out on that.  I decided to check out the books that I had brought with me, maybe they would hold some clue as to what was going on and why I couldn’t seem to remember so much.  Well here’s to hoping that I wouldn’t be interrogated like some criminal when I got to Anita’s house.  Hey it could happen!