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Chapter two

Buffy went and sat down on the couch again
this time Spike joined her there.

He kissed her gently at first, then harder as she
returned the kiss. "Wait" she said and pulled back.

"Whats wrong?" he asked.

"We have to figure out what this is. I can't
just come over here, kiss you and go home confused
every week or so" she said seriously.

"Why not? It works for me. Except I would like to
see you more often." replied Spike. "Just accept
it Slay..., Buffy. Don't analyze it, enjoy it!"

"I can't, its not that easy. Spike on numerous
occasions you have tried to kill me and now you
say you love me. How can I be sure of you?"
she asked distressed.

He put his arm around her. "I don't know how you
can be sure. But I haven't tried to harm you or
your little friends in months.

"Thats true, but I did overhear you tell those vamps
that you had me where you wanted me." She said the
confusion evident in her voice.

Spike smiled "That was self preservation, Buffy"

Buffy looked down at the floor, "But I still have
feelings for Angel, even though he's gone."

"Okay, I accept that. But you have feelings for
me too, or you wouldn't be here now." he said
knowing there was truth in his words.

She stared into his eyes, she put her hand on his
cheek and pulled him into a gentle kiss. Soon
tongues fought for control of the kiss, fighting
seemed to be what they were best at. Spike felt
a wetness on his cheek, he opened his eyes to see
her crying. He pulled away abruptly.

"Whats wrong?" she asked him tears in her eyes.

"You tell me, you're the one crying, crying over
him! When you kiss me, Slayer, I want you to be
thinking of ME!" he shouted at her. "He's gone
Buffy! You have to accept that whether you
ever accept me or not. HE IS GONE!" He said it
fiercely.

Buffy shouted back at him "Stop shouting at ME!"
He stopped immediately, his pout matched Buffys.

Buffy sighed and started to explain "I was crying
because I realized I wasn't thinking of him. And
it felt like I was betraying him again. I was
thinking of you! I was kissing you! What was I
thinking? This will never work." She said
despairingly as she got up to leave.

He pulled her gently back down on the couch "I'm
sorry" he whispered in her ear. "I am so sorry."

"I know you are sorry, I know you didn't mean to
yell. We are both confused, what are we going to
do?" she asked tiredly.
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