Xander reentered the library a half-hour later; hoping that everyone was still gone. He almost got his wish.
"Uncle Xander!"
Bracing himself for impact, he caught Connor as he leapt at him and swung him around. The little boy laughed happily.
"Guess what?" Connor's excited voice seemed to fill the empty library.
Xander only wished it could fill the empty place in his heart. "What?"
"Guess!"
"Um," Xander changed his hold and swung him up to his shoulders. "You're going to be an astronaut?"
"Nope. Guess again."
"You've turned purple and your insides are made of marshmallows?"
He giggled happily. "You're bein' silly! Now guess!"
"You're going to…" he stopped as Willow came out of the office. She looked amazing. Her hair was done up in some intricate twist and the dress she was wearing seemed to float around her. "…tell your Mom how amazingly beautiful she looks."
As Connor began wiggling, Xander lowered him to the ground. "No silly! My Daddy's going to visit me." He stopped bouncing and tilted his head. "If he's gonna be my daddy again, what will you be?"
"Alone," Xander whispered. Seeing Connor's expectant gaze, he gave him an impish smile that he was pretty sure cost him his heart. "I'll still be your Uncle Xander. We'll still do stuff and have fun."
"Will you still love mommy?"
Willow's eyes widened as the library doors opened behind the two boys. She was beginning to regret bringing him here to the library. Beginning to regret putting Xander through this.
Why couldn't life be simple?
"I'll always love your Mommy, Connor. She's my best friend."
The doors swung shut behind the other three and Connor immediately turned. Oz swallowed hard and knelt down. "Hey Con…"
His sentence was cut off as his son collided with him. They tumbled to the floor together, holding each other tightly.
Willow' breath caught at the sight. Then her gaze traveled to Xander, and tears filled her eyes.
Was she doomed to always have to choose between these two men?
Giles walked into the library and gestured to the table. "I took the liberty of assuming you would all help, since it is Saturday."
Xander sat at his regular seat across from the computer. "Just call me research guy."
Buffy sat next to him, resting her hand on his knee. She bent forward. "Why are you so keen to help?"
"The sooner this is over, the sooner we can all go back to our lives. Willow will have her family and I'll have nothing."
"Xander."
"Okay," he smiled. "I'll have you. In a purely platonic way, of course." He watched for a brief moment as Willow helped Connor and Oz up from the floor. "She looks amazing, doesn't she?"
Buffy nodded. "Yeah."
"She got dressed up for him." He took a deep breath to hold back his tears. "I thought I had more of a chance, but apparently I wasn't even a consideration."
Oz was finally sequestered in Giles' office, answering a barrage of questions. Connor was curled up in a chair behind the circulation counter taking his afternoon nap.
Buffy glanced at her two original Slayerettes and sighed. "I'm going to get a soda. You guys want?"
"No thanks." Xander turned the page of his book without even looking up.
"Come with me, Wills?"
"Wh…" Buffy grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the room before she could even finish the word. Outside the double doors, she pulled away from the Slayer. "What was that for?"
"We need to talk."
Willow shook her head. "No. I know what I'm doing."
"So do I. You're breaking Xander's heart."
"You don't understand."
"I do. You feel guilty. You feel like you owe Oz something. Or maybe you think you owe Connor something, but you owe yourself something too. You didn't cause your marriage to fall apart, Willow."
"You heard him today Buffy. He left because I still loved Xander."
Buffy sighed in exasperation. "You weren't even listening to what he said, were you? You were just listening for what you wanted to hear. Are you so afraid that what you have with Xander is a fluke that you're just willing to throw it away to run back to a relationship that's already failed once?"
"I have his son!"
"And you have Xander's heart!" Buffy tried to calm down, but found she couldn't. "Connor will always be Oz's son no matter who you're with or what you're doing. Nothing can ever change that. And Oz will always love him. No matter what, Willow. But Xander's heart…"
"Is something that I've wanted since I was a child." Willow glared at the Slayer. "And now I have it and you think I'm throwing it away. Well, I'm scared. I'm scared that the only reason I have his heart is because he feels bad that he hurt me so long ago. That he feels sorry for me."
"You don't believe he loves you?"
"I don't know what to believe."
"Then you're an idiot." Buffy turned and walked away.
Willow stared after her for a long while. She sank down on the hallway floor and sighed. She loved Oz. He was the man she'd married, believing that it would be forever. But Oz was the man who had left her for another woman. Who'd turned her away for so long.
He was the father of her child.
But Buffy was right. He would always be that, no matter what.
Did she owe him another chance? Did he want one? Did she?
"Wills? You okay?" Xander sat down beside her and leaned back against the locker. "I imagine this was all a pretty big shock to you."
"Yeah."
"I want you to know that whatever happens…I'll always be your friend, Wills. And I don't want us to lose touch the way we did before." He stared down at his hands. "I love you, Willow."
"I love you too."
"And I'll wait until you've made a decision and I'll honor it."
"Xander?" She turned to look at him, her green eyes shiny with tears. "What did you do while I was gone?"
"Honestly?"
"Yeah."
He laughed. "I had dinner with your folks once a week and I begged information from your mom. But she always kept the big things from me, apparently. She'd just say that you were fine and doing well and no, you weren't coming home any time soon."
"Oh. When we were in high school…after the fluke?" She waited for his nod, making sure he knew what she was talking about. "After they found us…did you…did you ever…"
"I thought about you every day. I tried not to. I tried to do everything to get you out of my head and my heart. I…well, there was Faith and I tried so hard, Wills." His eyes pleaded with her. "But you wouldn't leave me alone. I couldn't see past you anymore."
"I want you to know, Xander, that I do love you." She took his hand in hers and tried to remember what it was to be young and innocent. "But right now, for Connor's sake, I have to deal with helping Oz get away from Katherine. After that, I'll be able to deal with me. And you. And Oz."
"I'll wait."
She smiled. "I know."
They waited until Buffy joined them then made their way back to the library. Buffy went inside and Willow was about to follow her, when Xander grabbed her arm lightly. His brown eyes were serious. "I know that I just made this grand speech and promised I'd wait no matter what. But…just in case you choose him?"
"We're not supposed to." She smiled.
"Exception for…" He stopped as her lips found his and she wrapped her arms around his neck. Losing himself in the feel and taste of her, Xander gathered her to him and held her tightly to him. Everything he was he poured into the kiss. His love, his faith, his hope for their future was there in one simple touch.
Willow pulled away, slightly dazed. "I wish we'd done that a long time ago, Xander."
"So do I, Wills. So do I." He smiled and took her hand, leading her into the library. Oz and Giles were just coming out of the office and they all gathered around the table.
"I think we've figured out what will happen." Giles checked the book he had open in his hand. "I believe very strongly that Katherine will come to Sunnydale. I don't believe that she'll come during the full moon, however, as that is when Oz will be at his strongest. While she has control over the wolf's…"
"Needs." Oz said quietly.
"Needs, she does not have control of his strength, especially since she too will be affected." Placing the book on the table, Giles removed his glasses. "But she'll want the advantage of being in wolf form."
"That doesn't make sense," Buffy stated.
"I believe she'll be here the night after Oz's last change and she'll use a spell to transform herself and the rest of her pack into wolves. They'll come after Oz and use their strength against him."
"When they hunt in packs, they're pretty hard to escape or resist." Oz sighed.
"So, what can we do?" Xander asked.
"This is the part I'm not so sure about." Giles glanced at Willow. "We want you to perform a spell that will transform Oz into a wolf as well. Then she'll be at a disadvantage."
"How will it be different?"
"With the spell we've found, Oz will retain many of his human characteristics, such as his speech and thought processes."
"Like Michael J. Fox in Teen-Wolf?" Xander asked.
Oz nodded. "Except no basketball. Unless she challenges me to a game."
Xander laughed, wishing he could hate him. "At least you're taller as the wolf."
Clearing his throat, Giles continued. "We're going to set a trap for her and her friends. Since none of us wants to kill her or any other members of the pack, we're going to have to use tranquilizer guns and ropes. I'm going to need everyone's help."
Everyone nodded. Willow's troubled eyes caught his. "Giles? What about Connor? What if she goes after him?"
"I think you should have your parents take a trip for a day or two and take Connor with them. I think Oz is her main objective, so he should be safe if he's out of town. But I'm not in any way sure." His expression was deadly serious. "I can't offer any guarantees, Willow."
"Who expects guarantees on the Hellmouth?" She asked quietly. Her eyes traveled to Oz. Once more their lives were at risk. Once more their son's life was threatened. "You know, this kid has so many enemies, you'd think he was a Slayer."
Buffy giggled. "That would throw the Watcher's Council for a loop, wouldn't it?"
Willow walked over to the circulation counter and stared down at her son. He looked so peaceful, so innocent. They'd all been that innocent once. Casting a quick glance at her ex-husband, she sighed, wondering how long the innocence would last.