Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?    Has your spouse, before or after marriage, ever treated you like Juliet from Romeo and Juliet?

Do you ever wonder where these marriages come from that the couples stick together like glue?

Well, those marriages are far and few between.  The standard marriage is just like mine ... so take a good look ladies -- cause this is what  you get ...

You can never get a good night sleep.  In the beginning of a marriage, well, face it, sleep is just not that important.  However, later on, it is.  By the time sleep is an important part of your life, the man in your life falls to sleep the minute his head hits the pillow, and the snoring starts five seconds later.  Now, I'm not talking about light snoring, I'm talking about heavy duty window rattling snoring.  You gently roll the man over on his side, and he proceeds to roll back over and start snoring louder than before.  Then, once you think the snoring has stopped, you just start to doze off, and all of a sudden you're jolted out of bed by a snore that makes you think someone had broken into your house.  So after you've realized it's just your husband snoring, you smack him, then roll him over.  The next time  you roll him over on his side, then kick him.  This goes on for most of the night until you're so exhausted nothing could wake you, except your alarm clock an hour later.
 

VACATIONS AND SUCH

What a laugh!  There are no more vacations after marriage.  A vacation at first might consist of a fishing or camping trip.  Then, later on, if you really want to, you can go hunting with the guys.  Oh yeah, there's always visits with the family.  Don't ask to stay in a hotel, 'cuz you'll just insult family members.

Evenings out?  Sure, you can go get drunk with the guys, play some pool and see how loud you can belch.  And if you really behave yourself, you can have all his drunken friends over and entertain them.

QUALITY COMPANIONSHIP

Huh?  You know those evenings before you got married, and you thought the guy was shy?  Well, honey, he wasn't shy, he just didn't have anything to say.  When you thought he was listening to you and you loved the way he would stare into your eyes and hang onto every word you said ... he was daydreaming about the engine in his car.  But ... give the man a telephone, and he'll talk anyone's ear off.  If you have something to say to your husband, make sure you have a cordless phone with intercom capabilities, call him up, and until he figures you're on the intercom and not on the phone, you'll have some great conversations.  However, once he figures out you're just talking to him from the intercom, it's all over.

IN THE END

Of course, the good side to all of this is, you can really do whatever you want to do and he won't really care.  So, being married is much like being single, except you no longer get to go out on dates.  My suggestion, just keep dating.