This year, Valentine's Day managed to once again make a large number of singles at our school blue. I mean, it's always nice to get a "perfumeogram" or a candy and poem from your friends, but it's always nicer to get it from a "somebody" (if you know what I mean!). But, the thing that gets on my nerves, is that some of the people who did get the stuff from a secret admirer or someone who has a crush on them, let their heads get so big, it won't fit through any of the doors at the school (yeah... look for them at lunch time. They are the ones with the moon-sized heads who have to be pushed through the caf door). Many of these people became, (how can I say this nicely) very... conceited and started acting like @$$#01E$. According to my knowledge of Physics, every action has an equal and opposite reaction (Newton's third law. You can double check that with Mr. Boghossian!). So, however you treat the ones who send love your way, is how you will be treated by those you love. Not to make you guys feel bad, but if your attempt to find love has been unsuccessful, maybe you should look back and see. Perhaps somewhere along the way you broke a heart (or two).
This is also known as nemesis, a theme found in Macbeth. Can you tell I've been studying too much?
Braindead
What's the deal with the need to be in a relationship? I mean, I'm not saying that relationships are bad - I'm a hopeless romantic - but some time or another, you should have your own independence. Relationships have their share of stress, and, frankly, to be single despite all the bitter claims, can be pretty damned good. I'll keep this article short and sweet, for the pure purpose of keeping up all the esteems of the singles out there. Hang with your friends, watch movies, and be happy. (Until that really hot guy/girl comes along.)
Starchild
To anyone who missed seeing our home-grown superstars, Heather and Erin Cunningham and Sofi Papamarko in this past weekend's production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat, two words: YOUR LOSS! L went on Saturday and I honestly can't think of a better way to have spent my evening!
Heather, Sofi and Erin played three of Joseph's many brothers (We're ALL woman, though - slightly embarrassed and extremely feminine former ed.) splendidly, and seeing them with painted-on unibrows and manly stubble was a treat (hee, hee)!
Heather performed a beautiful solo for "Canaan Days" and Erin and Sofi's scarf antics were unforgettable (cha, cha, cha)!
Congratulations, girls!
Qu
If you've ever felt the need to escape reality, we suggest watching a soap opera. (We highly recommend The Young and the Restless. They don't get any more unrealistic than that.) Here's a little game we pieced together. We call it: Six Degrees of Y&R. Yes, we've got too much time on our hands, but this show is better than watching the Comedy Network. We've found a way to connect every single character to each other (especially to Victor Newman, the, ah-hem, "main character"). Watch the show for a week, you'll soon be engulfed by the mind-numbing idiocy of the show. Here are some key words that may give you an idea what the show is like:
Incest, multiple marriages, lingerie (used as the answer to EVERYTHING!!!), poor fashion, BBAADDD acting and compulsive behaviour. In a nutshell, forget narcotics or alcohol. Nothing sucks your brain from your head better than soap operas.
The Couch Potatoes
P.S. If you have questions about Y&R, GH, AMC, or OLTL, write to us. We have a veteran who's been watching these shows since soap operas made the transition from radio to TV.
Hip hop may be at its height in terms of commercial acceptiblilty but creatively it's a wast land filled with jokers like Puff Daddy, Mase and many others.
In comes Sugar Ray, the supposed one hit wonders (remember "Fly") finally gets it all right. The latest album 14:59, an Andy Warhol reference of the statement "everyone has 15 minutes of fame," is heavily hip hop influenced but is mixed with laid back So-Cal punk and pop making it one of the best albums I've heard in a while. The first single, "Every Morning" is one of the best songs on the album and is what you should expect, but harder songs like "Live and Direct" (featuring KRS One) and the Steve Miller cover of "Abrakadabra" are very remeniscent of their earlier work but feature powerful rap baselines and DJ scratches.
While what Sugar Ray has done is not exactly "original" (KoRn and Fun Lovin' Criminals have done similar efforts) it's still nice to see someone take the suddenly overly serious genres of punk and hip hop and have some fun with it.
***1/2 out of 5
Jaded and Elated
On Monday, several O.A.C. English and Writer's Craft classes ventured forth to Yonge and Sheppard to (enter awe-inspiring hush here) The Grande Theatre to see Shakespeare in Love. Our teachers claimed its educational purpose was to "enhance our studies of William Shakespeare". Hmmmm. Let us reflect on this statement for a moment. This plot of the story is Shakespeare falls for some woman, and then she leaves him (however unwillingly) for this guy with a pearl earring. The woman is made up. She did not exist. Romeo & Juliet and Twelfth Night were not inspired by a woman named Viola. All the education we got from this film were some points (no pun intended) on Gwyneth Paltrow's anatomy. Cough.
Overall, the movie was worth the $5.25 we handed over. The costumes were beautiful, the script (by celebrated playwright Tom Stoppard and some other guy who is not nearly as celebrated) was cleverly written, and Joseph Fiennes' mile-long eyelashes put Tammy Faye Baker to shame. As for Paltrow, her Oscar nomination is well-deserved. She turned on the charm (as well as the vast majority of the male audience) in her role as Billy's muse. Having recently acted in drag myself (although I had more facial hair than Gwyneth), I felt a certain kinship with her. It was Dame Judy Dench as Queen Elizabeth, however, who stole the show. Her facial expressions were priceless, and she kept our strict attention...despite the fact that she kept her corset on.
Sofi
Lately, and I don't know whether or not it's because I'm getting older, but lots of people are having sex. Regardless of whether or not we admit it they are having it unprotected an unsafe. I know lots of girls that are becoming pregnant, and it can be very scary. So let's, instead of focusing all of our attention on abstinence we could also look at the fact that students are having sex and scared or not, they are not going to stop. Anyway, here it is...
PROS
CONS
My message, in the case one of you didn't catch it is, I think they are a good idea. Although, it is true that not all people that go to this school would act as responsibly as some others, But I also think that it is worth the risk. The reason we don't have condom machines is because we want to continue the good rep that Mac thinks it is keeping up if we don't have them. If you ask me, I think that a condom machine would be better than having pregnant girls and disease riddled individuals. I think that having a concern for the students of Mac is more important than keeping a good reputation.
Shortie
Do you smell what the Rock is cooking? To all the wrestleng fans out there, this is only one of the great lines from our favorite TV past times. I think wrestleng is wonderful sports entertainment. Wreslers have wicked moves (a show of true athleticism) and lines. But there are those who claim that it sucks because its fake. Fake?! Well, lets see how much you like it if someone gives you a suplex or DDT. It's kind of like a long running sports soap opera with plots and themes. I am not saying its Skakespeare but then again neither are most TV shows and soap operas that nopody complains about. And you know what? Soap operas are fale too. Nobody cares people still like it. The difference between the two is that wrestling is far superier in terms of acting and excitement. How exciting is some stupid story about a hospital as comparing to The Rock, the Greak One laying the smack down on Mankind or Hollywood Hogan joining the Wolfpack. Violent you say? Professional sports are much better at promoting violence when they let a crazy convicted vicious fighting in the rink. Wrestling is all about show and amazing manuvers, not crippling your opponent. Now, most women or skeptics resort to "A-hem... But wrestling is so immature..." Man, what is mature then? We know it's fake we just want to seed a good show. Every week, it just brings laughter to my heart when the slightly deformed Rick Steiner (Big Poppa Pump) utters these words: "Big Poppa Pump is your hook up. Holla if ya gear me!" And for those who ain't down with that, we got two words for ya. SUCK IT!!!!!
Dante
So, what's with the recent wrestling hype? What did wrestling become the "must-see" thing on TV?
I've heard people refer to professional wrestling as a male soap opera. I've people refer to professional wrestling as a male soap opera. They claim that a plot exists as well as violence, revenge, jealousy, and of course, sex, the main component to any daytime soap.
Okay, so let me ask yo this. When was the last time you tuned into Y&R and saw over-weight men wearing colourful leotards bouncing from one side of the ring to another? When was the last time Days of Our Lives has gorwn men (some old enough to be your grandfather), half-naked, mind you, take pleasure in jumping on top of other grown men? I must say, however, that the agility of these over-grown men is impressive, but if is still guite distateful to see their legs pulled over their heads.
How desperate and deprived we must be to accept this "pseudosport" and the likes (i.e. Jerry Springer) as fulfilling entertainment. After all, wrestling is an act. But if we are to criticize the fact that the Spice Girls can't dance or the Backstreet Boys can't sing, why accept wrestling as acting?
It frightens me to think that displays of male strength, domination, and egotism have come to this: men prancing around in tights claiming to be the king of the world.
dandypratt
Walking down a Macdonald hall can give a variety of experiences. Of course, there are happy memories like chatting with friends or yelling across the hall. However, there are many unpleasant memories such as slipping on wet floors, being blinded in the sunshine hall, and walking in the "wrong lane". Yet the most horrible of nightmares is meeting a figure of authority in the hall, also known as a "staff member" (SM for short). Usually, they aren't too scary, but maybe you owe them homework or failed to meet them for an appointment. Either way, they often come with an indescribable awkward moment in which you are never sure about how you should respond to them. To kindly help anyone ever caught in such a situation, I have, with much research, written down a few suggestions:
Peculiar Display