Run 1475
The Flippers family car park run

Hares: Geoff & Dave
On Back: At the Flipper fountain car park on the wet side of the Al Saada Bridge over Al Salaam Street

Well where do I start this week? The usual miserable lot of about 40 sinners including a few virgins in a strangely familiar car park at the end of Al Saada Street, in the Ramadan evening twilight. All had some really weird feeling we had all been there before????
This week the Hares, had been to a lot of trouble with chalk and flour and proceeded to give directions on Hash arrows, their new variations on splits, check backs and finally off we set through the deep sands and forests surrounding the waterfront car park one and all running and bimbling. The first 10 minutes of the run saw runners and bimblers alike meandering backwards and forwards like emus chasing crippled grasshoppers.
Finally someone found a real trail (or a poor excuse for one) and the runners broke away, only to be seen again emerging through the gloom of the date palms to briefly abuse the bimblers and vice versa. Several people were heard to moan and grumble about the sand, there was too much of it & it wasn’t good for bikes and prams – get over it – we are in Abu Dhabi - sand capital of the world- really!
As is the wont the runners disappeared off into the distance and the Bimblers enjoyed the scenery and peace and quiet of the Ifta part of the evening. Feedback from the runners ranged from heartbreaking to happiness. They all puffed, panted, sweated and complained so who knows what the run was really like.
The remainder of Bimblers used the walk to exercise their jaws and watch the runners on false trails, dodged traffic, and ploughed through sand!

Run score
Comments from the assembled multitude were “we could donate some chalk for them –2.5, the trail was great 13/10, who found it? -3, rubbish – 4, best run ever 1/10, bad flour -3, too much soft sand -2 (in Abu Dhabi surely not!), scenic 9, Bollocks -1, too many arrows, arrows intermittent -1, and a few more unprintable comments” and the final average was 9.31. An excellent score!

Virgins: Bill & Gaye from Gods own country - who are Brookes Mum & Dad over here to look after her, Theresa, Dominic and Ben who missed out on a down-down last week and Tom who has been away for so long he is now considered a virgin again.

Blabs - Maggie arrived late as usual but insisted her exercise was carrying her chair & wine in from the car

Awards:
Chris Grose for being member number 1000

DOWN DOWNS:
Doggy Style for “spending all my time in the UK and all I did was shopping for my daughter and didn’t get any shopping done myself” - Sure you didn’t!!!!
Pashmina and Ooze Ee for getting lost from the run to the down-downs and Ooze Ee was the person who sent directions for all Hashers
Brooke and Jo for racing and Jo again for phone on the Hash
Posh Doris for asking Perthy Throwup “what do I have to do to get a bandanna?
Posh Doris & Ball breaker for racing
Posh Doris for being very rude to Hash scribe and saying she would be happy to deliver his baby (pot belly) and go halves in the magazine royalties
Posh Doris was named Hash Dash for her improved running
Brats for being brats
Bill, Gaye, Brook and George for singing karaoke badly at George’s 40th birthday
Big Ears for short cutting
Bronwyn for spying on Big Ears in the pal forest while he was short cutting “and I tink he was taking a p*e”
Perth Throwup for being the only one on Hash who didn’t shortcut and something else unwarranted
Morris for saying “women get it too easy these days” a very brave man!
Matthew for his new haircut

RA’s report
The RA asked all and sundry to improve their singing. Perhaps this will happen after Ramadan

Social events
3rd November A boat trip to the Island and camp overnight
November 24th Liwa Hotel
14th Dec Xmas party - Please donate prizes

THE PROGRESSIVE DINNER
Was an excellent success and full credit goes to the organisers and the dinner meal hosts. Everyone put in a lot of effort and excelled themselves.
There were many hilarious happenings but most cannot be printed. If you missed out, ask someone what happened – they will be sure to tell you the truth and not elaborate at all

PLEASE NOTE
Thanks to Geoff and Chris for organising the food
Don’t forget to recycle cans
If you are bringing virgins, call or email Ooze ‘ee to assist the people catering

ON THE ROUGH SIDE
A man and a woman who had never met before, and were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train.
Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly - he in the upper bunk and she in the lower. At 1 am, the man leaned over and gently woke the woman saying, "I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married." "Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed."Good," she replied. "Get your own f__ king blanket!"
After a brief moment of silence.- He farted!!

ON ON!!!!