Run 1476
The Off Island Eid Mubarak Run


Hares: George & Big Ears
On Back: On the roof at Brooke & Georges abode

Well where do I start this week? A very quiet lot of about 30 sinners including a few virgins in the serenity of the Eid evening twilight Obviously a few away for Eid holidays
They were addressed by George who gave strict instructions to follow the ROWT???
What’s a ROWT? (perhaps there is a naming coming up?????)
This week the Hares, had been to a lot of trouble with coloured chalk and proceeded to give directions on Hash arrows, their new variations on splits, check backs and finally off we set through the deep sands shopping centres and mansions, one and all running and bimbling. The first 10 minutes of the run saw runners and bimblers alike meandering backwards and forwards like a one legged man in a b*m kicking competition.
Finally someone found a real trail (or a poor excuse for one) and the runners broke away, only to be seen again emerging through the gloom of the date palms to briefly abuse the bimblers and vice versa. Several people were heard to moan and grumble about the sand, there was too much of it & it wasn’t good for bikes and prams – get over it – we are in Abu Dhabi - sand capital of the world- really! Same as last week!
As is the wont the runners ran off very fast into the distance only to come back after a subtle check back and the Bimblers enjoyed the scenery and peace and quiet of the Ifta part of the evening. Feedback from the runners ranged from Insane to Idyllic They all puffed, panted, sweated and complained so who knows what the run was really like.
The remainder of Bimblers used the walk to exercise their jaws and watch the runners on false trails, dodged traffic, and ploughed through sand!

Run score
Comments from the assembled multitude were “Too short–2.5, the trail was great 13/10, arrows were too long -3, rubbish – 4, best run ever 1/10, Too many yobbo’s in cars -3, sand 10 (in Abu Dhabi surely not!), scenic 9, Bollocks -1, too many arrows -2.5, arrows only on the corners -1, and more unprintable comments” – Yawn, sigh - and the final average was 9.31.
An excellent score!

NEXT WEEKS RUN. TBA at 5:45PM
Hares: Franz & Evan

ANNOUNCEMENTS
Ballbreaker informed all that next April would be Abu Dhabi Island Hash’s 1500th run. She would head a committee to make it a special event. Volunteers please for assistance on the committee. Special T shirts would be printed. Can we have some creative assistance for new designs for the 1500th run T shirt. Please talk to Ballbreaker if you are Arty Crafty and can assist.
Xmas and New years are on Mondays – do Hashers want a run?

Virgins: Jo from Sydney, Linda Clarke, Dan from Bristol, Emma, Rob, Matt from Melbourne and Andy (Tea Boy) and Maggie who has been away for so long she is now considered a virgin again.

Blabs Maggie and Vlad the Impaler arrived late as usual but insisted they got lost

HASH MASTERS REPORT
Ooze Ee asked all and sundry to improve their formation of a circle. It looked like a flat football bladder!
Please make sure the committee has all your current contact details

DOWN DOWNS:
The Hares for setting a 9.31 point run and Russell for walking too fast while checking Georges run the day before
Pashmina for something to do with her hair - Ooze Ee is a Very brave man
Pashmina for talking while the Hash Master (Ooze Ee) was speaking - Ooze Ee is a Very silly man
Pashmina for not finishing her down-down – Has Ooze Ee lost the plot & who will be cooking for the rest of the week?

THE RA’S (JOLLY ROGERER) SERMON
Jolly Rogerer started with a clean joke then deteriorated

DOWN DOWNS
A Virgin - Jo for telling Perthy Throwup “I’m easy”

Then on to the Progressive dinner awards
For herself (Jolly Rogerer) (to lubricate the larynx) for hosting the appetiser course with Perthy Throwup – for not cooking and arriving after the guests had all arrived. (“I was having my hair done & then couldn’t get a taxi”)
Perthy Throwup for being the perfect date who doesn’t open his eyes in the morning
Vlad the Impaler for telling Maggie about her man “I’ll call you in the morning when I am finished with him”
Vlad the Impaler been in Hash for 300 years and didn’t know who Hash Master was
Maggie “who only comes in the desert”
Maggie for animal abuse – going out of her way to step on Brookes dog
Maggie for an unprintable quote involving “Ferrets, Hamsters and other things”
Ooze Ee for making notes then can’t read his own writing
Ooze Ee for telling people “I have to go to work on the weekend” then staying home and watching cricket – he would have been better at work as England lost to the Aussies again!
Elbie for playing Crap music
Franz for turning the progressive dinner into a Bed & breakfast
Jeff for being 1 hour late for dessert
George for smoking in the circle
Several sinners for short cutting

NAMING
Maggie was finally named after 276 Hashes for her diatribe on “Ferrets, Hamsters and other things” and is henceforth to be known as Dr Ferrett

SOCIAL EVENTS
3rd November A boat trip to the Island and camp overnight
November 24th Liwa Hotel
14th Dec Xmas party - Please donate prizes
Xmas day run to be decided
New Years day run to be decided

THE PROGRESSIVE DINNER
Was an excellent success and full credit goes to the organisers and the dinner meal hosts. Everyone put in a lot of effort and excelled themselves.
There were many hilarious happenings but most cannot be remembered or printed. If you missed out, ask someone what happened – they will be sure to tell you the truth and not elaborate at all.

PLEASE NOTE
Thanks to Brooke for organising the food
Don’t forget to recycle cans ie Cans in one bag all other rubbish in another bag!
If you are bringing virgins, call or email Ooze ‘ee to assist the people catering
Please make sure the committee has all your current contact details


ON ON!!!!