FOOTPRINT

The official organ of the Abu Dhabi Island Hash House Harriers AUH4


Hashing is a state of mind- a friendship of kindred spirits joined together for the sole purpose of reliving their childhood or fraternity days, releasing the tensions of everyday life, and generally, acting a fool amongst others who will not judge you or measure you by anything more than your sense of humor."
Stray Dog (From the Global Trash Hash Bible complete reference for the Hash House Harriers)

This has proved very effective as I haven’t one single sinner email me to ask where the run was, so……….


NEXT WEEKS RUN - Run no. 1510:
Monday 3rd June 2007
HARES: Truffles and Big ears
Run – Start time: 18:00 (6 p.m.) at the Officers club near the sand spit - Drive up 30th street towards Mussafah bridge, bear off right towards Officer's club STRAIGHT ON by roundabout at club entrance . Take first right turn and 4wd turn right at track onto beach (low ratio recommended) follow signs up kerb and onto beach. 2wd park and short walk across to beach.
ON BACK – the same place bring chairs – you will need them

Run 1509
"THE NORTH, SOUTH & WEST RUN" RUN
Monday: 28th May 2007
HARES: Shane, Carl, Fran, Thunder down Under and How much?
ON BACK: Shane & Frans mansion

THE RUN
Most people had had enough travelling by the time they reached the furthest part of the island let alone on the mainland but whinged and binged and ran anyway Shane elaborated in correct military terms on the condition, length and direction of the run. We were told not to venture to far North, South and West or we’d fall off the edge of the world, but poor old East didn’t get a Guernsey. We didn’t count heads after the run so it’s possible a few did slip of the edge.
'Ooz 'Ee probably did roll up and was probably late so no-one was any the wiser.

THE RUN – VERDICT
The Hares were called into the circle, and amid repeated nattering offences by groups of Hashers, who, as usual gossiped and denied it!!! Copy this bit each week. The comments ranged from Shite, to worse than shite, too much fish smell, too much soft sand, too many water features and all the usual whingeing and bitching that ensues. Too long; Too much chalk -2: Nice trees; Soft sand +5: walkers trails 0: Length just right 10; No major roads -5: arrows 15/10; soft sand -3; it was too long; not enough mingling with the bimblers; Check backs -0; Too many hills; too much traffic, too much water; bimblers got lost -6; too much fresh air, not enough false trails; Someone Boked etc etc etc grizzel, bitch, whinge!
Despite the usual natterers and some new ones interfering, unusually the final mark was - miracle of miracles - around 9.31 – well it was exactly 9.31 to be precise. Its amazing how this seems to happen every week! Big Ears was appointed Songmaster and used a completely old repertoire, which sounded remarkably like the old faithful, at last giving most Hashers an excuse for not singing.

HARE-RAISER
Dancing Queen – Needs a lot more Hares to step up and hopes Truffles had remembered he was Haring next week

The GM, Ooze Ee
VIRGINS -
Richard and Leith from Gods own country
Donald and Mina (originally Tehran) from the country god evacuated – Kuwait

HM announced that
Mainland Hash a run on the 22nd June at Buraimi
MH3 SUMMER AWAY BASH
21/22 June Buraimi Hotel 0096825642010. Book your own rooms. Duplex Chalet Dhs 350 per night (incl. 2 breakfasts), double room in hotel Dhs 250 per night,(including 2 breakfasts). Friday Run with T shirt expected to be 100dhs (depending on final cost of T shirt). Evening barbecue 50 dhs. Drinks and food at the hotel are cheap for the rest of the time. Survivors run Saturday morning normally round the houses and drink up beer.

Charges
Maurice – loitering with intent
Pulque Mirage for asking what does On-On mean??
Several other charges that couldn’t be heard due to natterers

NEW Members
Georg with no second E and Herman – together again!

The RA
HM then handed over to Perthy Throwup

Ooze EE for something
Pasmina & Serpil for short cutting or talking – or both
Phone abuse on Hash for Jolly Rogerer and Tin Tin who also copped another for keeping his wife waiting while he did his hair & put on his makeup
Shane for inventing suspect new vocabulary for the AUH 4 Hash with words such as Symbology, spine, Teeny weeny?? and happy little trails - he was talking about arrows for goodness sake!!!!!
Chris and Richard for missing a check – continuing on and not calling then & short cutting also Carpet Burns and Jolly Rogerer
Ralph for short cutting and also “I love picking up women??”
Sheila and Maurice and Shane & Frans little girl, for violating the dress codes of AUH4. Sheila’s Hawaiian shirt was like something out of a Kafka novel and unlucky Maurice discovered the sin of wearing a yellow T shirt. The brat was dressed as a fairy and lots of others wanted to borrow the dress!!!!
On THAT topic it was discovered that an unnamed male (we think?) Hasher, phoned Big Ears during the week and asked “I don’t suppose you’d have a dress that would fit me?’ Big Ears was certain that Dancing Queen was out of town so we asked the assembled multitudes if anyone in attendance was guilty?? Ken was man ?? enough to admit “it was me – guilty as charged!” But we never did find out why he wanted a dress!
Richard – a virgin was wearing his nice new running shoes and he just happened to be brought to Hash by Chris who didn’t think to warn the virgin Chris copped the Down-down. Lucky the socks were new too!
Evan for sand bagging and a pathetic excuse for running
Louise for telling Perthy Throwup “I want a big one” and then proceeding to give him a massage – which did neither of us any good@!
Shane to Jolly Rogerer “I hope you have a stiff agenda this week – we do!”

CHARGES FROM THE FLOOR
Romany and Jolly Rogerer lined up behind Chris. They had been making funny accusations and noises about Chris’s legs then saying “its something that we’ve never seen before” Jolly Rogerer disguised as a rabbit??

THE TUCKER
A fantastic BBQ ’d feed on a fairly large BBQ thanks to Shane & Fran

As we have been saying, please let committee know if you are bringing Virgins as we could be embarrassed for food if we have an influx of extras. We don’t want anyone to have to do a “loaves and fishes” each week.

SOCIAL EVENTS
June 15th - Brunch at the revolting restaurant
June 18th – a combined Hash with the Mainlanders
June 22nd - Buraimi Hash to be advised
July ???? – a progressive dinner

SOME POLITICALLY INCORRECT HUMOUR
Signs
Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."
On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon :
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
On another Septic Tank Truck:
"We're #1 in the #2 business"
At a Proctologist's door:
"To expedite your visit please back in."
On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
On a Church's Billboard:
"7 days without God makes one weak."
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :
"Invite us to your next blowout."
At a Towing company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."
At an Optometrist's Office :
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up."
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."
Chicago Radiator Shop:
"Best place in town to take a leak."


Don’t forget –

Please recycle all cans – Perthy will take all cans back to assist their Harriss with an early return to Bangladesh – so please put all food scraps in a separate bag

If you haven’t Hared any runs or hosted the Down downs Dancing Queen would like to talk to you. We all need to take our turns

Numbers have been climbing so if you are bringing Virgins along please let Hash Committee know as we would hate to be embarrassed by shortage of food and even worse run out of Hash Water


AUH4 WEBSITE

Don’t forget to look up the AUH4 website. Many thanks to Sheila for putting so much effort into a GREAT website - and check out any incriminating photos of yourself!!

Web site - where you are now


Click to be transported to photo site

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