by Anne Mikusinski
When I was small, it seemed that the whole year was a build up for the arrival
of Christmas. The real anticipation didn't begin however, until after Thanksgiving,
when Christmas Carols began to play incessantly on every radio station, and
stores and television stations began their yearly chant of "buy, buy,
buy" trying to make each toy and game look more attractive than the last,
telling all children that this was the thing that they "had to have!"
Added to all of this were the lessons that I was taught in religion class about
Advent, and the preparations for the birth of Christ that were mirrored each
night at home with the lighting of the candle on our Advent wreath, and the
special prayers before dinner. Both my parents were devout Catholics, and
tried to impress upon my younger brother and I that Christmas, as the Grinch
learned, "means a little bit more" then the gifts that we were hoping
to receive. Of course there also was the surprise of opening the window for
each day on the Advent calendar, and enjoying the little picture or poem that
was revealed, the making of wish lists, the multiple visits to the stores, and
to Santa, so that he would "be absolutely sure" to remember to bring
us what we had asked for.
And then, finally, the great
day arrived...and my brother and I would be up almost at first light (if I had
even slept at all) racing down the stairs to delve into our stockings and
exclaim over the treasures found within, before being herded by our exhausted
parents into the kitchen to eat breakfast and get ready for church where we
could hardly sit still, thinking of nothing but getting home and opening our
presents, playing with them until relatives came to visit , bringing more
gifts, and sitting down to the lavish meal that my mother had planned and
obsessed over for weeks in advance. And after the day had ended, there
was still that wonderful week of vacation, tromping outside to go sledding or
build snowmen and playing until we were almost numb with cold and
exhaustion. Then New Years Eve, and New Years day, which often took us
down to New York City to visit family and to go and see the tree at Rockefeller
Center, and the wonderfully decorated department store windows. Then sadly it
all came to an end, as we celebrated Epiphany, or "Little Christmas,"
which marked the visit of the three kings, but to us children, it was the day
that my parents spent taking all the decorations down and putting our presents
away..and the beginning of the waiting for us.
As I got older, of course, time seemed to move faster, and now that I was an
adult, the months of hype and preparation seemed to speed by, as did each
passing year, for that matter. Not that I still didn't get excited over
Christmas, I did, and as Jack could attest, I still was moved by the sentiment,
as he handed me tissue after tissue while I sniffled through "It's a
Wonderful Life" and, of course, the Grinch.
"I do this every year..," I told him. "So you might as well get
used to it."
He just laughed softly and kissed me on the cheek. "My wife has a
sensitive soul, I think that's just one of the reasons I love her so
much."
I was thinking of all this as I got ready for Church this Sunday morning, the
day after New Years' as I realized that we'd be celebrating "Little
Christmas" today...somewhat earlier than most years, but that was the way
the calendar had worked. I sighed as I buttoned my blouse and fixed my hair,
feeling slightly melancholy. This past week had been wonderful, with Jack
being here, on vacation, full of long leisurely mornings and romantic nights,
and most importantly, conversation. We talked about almost everything not
work related, enjoying the chance to learn the things about each other that we
still didn't know. Sure we had worked together for almost a year, and were
together almost 24-7 when things got busy, but now that we were married, we
were discovering the important things, like favorite music, favorite colors..
and most crucial, whether the toothpaste should be squeezed from the top or the
bottom. And of course, dealing with each others little quirks, and habits, all
the things newlyweds had to go through.
It had been a week that both of us needed desperately, and now that it was
almost over, I couldn't help but feel a little bereft. But I didn't want to
dwell on that, because I had one more holiday surprise for Jack. Reaching into
my dresser drawer I pulled out the brightly wrapped square package and smiled,
thinking of what was within, and feeling kind of annoyed that I hadn't been
able to give it to him on Christmas, but the jeweler had a family emergency
that couldn't be helped. What was important was that I had it now. I couldn't
wait til he unwrapped it, and since I didn't know what we'd be doing after
Mass, I stuck in my pocketbook, just as Jack poked his head into the bedroom to
see if I was ready to go. I walked into the living room smoothing my skirt,
watching him smile as he gave me a long appreciative look that always made my
heart beat a little faster.
I smiled back, and shook my head slightly. "What love? You must have seen
this outfit at least 12 times before."
He walked over to me and kissed me lightly on the lips. "True," he
admitted. "But you're my wife now; it's different."
I returned his kiss warmly, and stood on tip toe (even though I was in heels
)to run my hands through his hair before I stepped back to look at him.
He as always was impeccably dressed in his dark grey suit (a personal favorite
of mine), with one of the new white shirts I had bought him for
Christmas. He looked, in a word, resplendent.
I told him so. "You don't look so bad yourself, Counselor — not bad at
all! I'm impressed!"
He laughed softly, "Well, I do try. I'm the DA...."
Having heard him say this a million times before, I finished the statement for
him. "I have a reputation to uphold. Anyway, we should get going. I'm
ready if you are."
"Sure...but...," He glanced down at my feet a minute. "The
heels are fine for church, love, but I was thinking we'd catch the subway down
to Manhattan later — go see the tree, do some window shopping, maybe have an
early dinner. You were talking about how you used to do that all the time when
you were young, and it is a beautiful day."
I smiled. "Really? That sounds wonderful." I hurried back
into the bed room and got a tote bag and a pair of comfortable flats. And I
remembered to take the package from my pocketbook and place it in the tote as
well. We checked that Jack had the house keys and a minute later, left
for church.
In his homily this morning, the priest echoed my earlier thoughts as he spoke
of how quickly the holidays seemed to pass the older we got, and he urged us to
try to keep the message and the spirit of the season with us throughout the
whole year. After Mass was over, I ducked into the restroom for a
moment to change my shoes and we headed to the subway station to catch the next
train into Manhattan.
We spent the rest of the afternoon leisurely walking around the city, admiring
the store windows, and going into the stores when we got too cold. We
ended up in Rockefeller Center, looking up at the tree in admiration. Of
course it looked a little smaller than I remembered it looking when I was
young, but it was still beautiful and for a while we just stood in silence,
admiring the twinkling lights and the bright star that shone on
top. I sighed softly, lost in thought and Jack put his arm around
me and drew me close for a quick hug.
"Memories?" he asked. I just nodded, thinking about past times and
family members long gone and sorely missed.
He must have sensed that whatever I was feeling was too hard for me to put into
words for he changed the subject and asked me, "Are you hungry?
Because I think I know where we can go for dinner."
Taking my hand, we walked into 30 Rockefeller Plaza and took the elevator up to
the Rainbow Room.
"But Jack I thought that..." I stopped talking as the maitre d walked
over to greet us.
"Ah, Mr. McCoy, how wonderful to see you again." He smiled at me.
"And this must be your lovely wife. We've heard so much about you!
Your table will be ready
momentarily." He bustled away, leaving me looking after him
in stunned surprise, until I glanced over at Jack who was grinning madly.
The waiter came over to show us to our table (one by the window no less, with a
panoramic view of the skyline )and as Jack held out my chair for me, I found my
voice again. "You planned this, didn't you?"
He took his seat across from me and smiled. "Yeah," he said, putting
his head down and trying to look adorably sheepish. "I kinda did. And, by
the way, I'm not going back into work until Tuesday. So tonight, my dear, is
ours. No rushing allowed. I know you were feeling sad about vacation being
over, so I wanted to make this a night to remember."
I let out a long breath, and smiled. "And I'm sure it will be. This is
wonderful Jack. Thank you."
We looked at our menus and I held my tongue as I noticed the prices knowing
that I could never be able to afford such a place myself. We placed our
orders and were sipping our wine in silence when the small orchestra in the
corner of the room began to play "Stardust," one of my favorite songs
from the 40's.
A moment later Jack was at my side. "Care to dance?" he asked. I
nodded. We walked onto the dance floor and he drew me close as we moved to the
soft music. For a few moments, everything else just disappeared. We stayed on
the floor for a few songs and then returned to our table. A few minutes later
our food arrived and we enjoyed a leisurely dinner. As the waiter cleared our
plates away, I remembered the package in my tote, and as soon as he had gone, I
spoke.
"This has been a wonderful night so far, Jack, but I'm afraid that you're
not the only one who's full of surprises." I bent down and retrieved the
package from my bag, and handed it to him. "I wanted to give this to you
on Christmas, but it wasn't ready yet. I hope you like it."
He reached over and took it from me. "But you gave me a gift." The
paper rustled as he tore it open and saw the blue velvet jewelry box within.
"Anne," he started. But I just shook my head.
"Open it," I urged him. "The suspense is killing me!"
He did and I heard his sharp intake of breath as he saw what was inside. Two 14
carat gold cufflinks, each engraved with his initials "JJM" with a
small onyx stone set over each letter. They had cost a small fortune (well, a
small fortune for me) but I knew that it was worth the expense when I saw the
look on his face.
"Anne...." He struggled to find the right words. "These are
beautiful. And just what I needed, but how...."
I just shook my head. "It's not polite to ask how much a gift cost, love,
you know that. By the way, I had something engraved on the back of each one, if
you turn them over."
He did, and then looked up at me questioningly. "Ok, I understand it has
the Christmas date — but what is this capital "N" on one and this
capital "A" on the other?"
I reached over to take his hands in mine and squeezed them before I explained.
"It's very simple Jack. The "N" means that I love you now; the
"A" means that I'll love you always. These past few months have been,
without a doubt, the most wonderful, exciting, frustrating — amazing time of my
life. I never thought, when I came here a year ago to work for you, that I
would find — all in one place — a job I loved, and a husband that I
adored." I swallowed hard around the lump that was forming in my throat.
"And this is how I wanted to express that feeling to you."
Jack rose from his chair and walked over to me, bending down to kiss me
tenderly. "I don't know what to say. What I do know is...." He broke
into a huge smile. "All I want to do right now is pay the check and go
home and be with my wife."
I laughed softly, "Great minds think alike, dear heart. And, the
night is still young."
We called the waiter over, paid the check, took the elevator down to the lobby
and, once outside, managed to find a cab. I watched as Jack leaned forward to
give the cabby our address and then snuggled up against him as he pulled away
from the curb. I could feel his heart pounding, even through his wool
coat. I wrapped my arms around him and rested my head on his shoulder. In a few
days, he would be back to work and the old pattern would return, but as he had
said before, tonight would definitely be special.
End
©1999 by Anne
Mikusinski
Back to
Exculpatory Evidence!