THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE UGLY
 
By Bluerose
 
We have come to this site to honor Sam Waterston : actor, humanitarian, 
family man, and all-round sexy Scorpio. We first met Mr. Waterston 
through his acting so we initially sought out the Man because of his 
acting ability,and have found a world of characters to love, hate and 
both. We have found a consummate actor who can play classic theatre [The Glass Menagerie, Much Ado about Nothing-thank God for videotape!], 
high camp and cult [Serial Mom, Rancho DeLuxe], slapstick [Finnegan Begin Again], and horror [Tales from the Crypt, Strange Tales, Part IV]. He has played real- life heroes [Lincoln, Jefferson], torn heroes 
[Oppenheimer], and fictional, fickle cads [Sweet William]. And let’s not forget his participation in the biggest bomb since Nagasaki: Heaven’s Gate.
 
But let’s be honest, here;how difficult is it to find a stellar 
performance in films like Mindwalk,A Captive in the Land, or Eagle’s Wing [not only is Mr. W naked from the waist up, he delivers a solid 
performance nearly mute.]? Unusual films, but wonderfully crafted to bring out the best in an actor’s skills.
 
Can one truly expect to find that craftsmanship in the early, low 
budget films every actor must endure to survive in the beginning of his 
career? Or can an exceptional actor rise above his material? I believe the answer is yes. I plan to prove that Mr. W shines in whatever is offered to him by critiquing my all-time favorite BAD Waterston films.
 
THE GOOD BAD MOVIES 
 
Hands down,the BEST of the bad movies is Warning Sign. This poor 
Man’s Andromeda Strain seems to be the movie most Sam-Fans know, and it offers us a glimpse at a number of recognizable faces in their 
formative years as actors. Richard Dysart, Jeffrey De Munn, [both of whom have appeared on Law & Order], Kathleen Quinlan [who hasn’t], Yaphet Kotto [O.K., he was in H:LOTS, but that’s close!] and especially 
Keith Szarabajka [who we know and hate as Jaime Ross’ ex, Neil Gordon]. These people are clearly having the time of their professional lives and are making the most of a truly bad situation. It is essentially a buddy movie between the sheriff and disgraced, alcoholic scientist, Dr. Fairchild [probably one of the most unfortunate side-kick’s name since Nero Wolfe’s Archie Goodwin] Besides, Mr. W’s Sheriff Cal Morse limps from polio, wears jeans and is studying to be a lawyer—what’s not to love?
 
In Who Killed Mary What’s-er Name? [a.k.a. Death of a Hooker], our 
Sam portrays a budding filmmaker and film-lover who also becomes the 
daughter-lover of main character Red Buttons. Mr. Buttons doesn’t 
trust our Sam [but look at those EYES!!] and Mr. W doesn’t encourage any trust, fatherly or otherwise. One unnamed star of this movie is the 
clothes and over-all style--this is obviously a 60’s movie and worth a 
laugh for anyone who lived through it. There’s a sweet pre-Jack 
moment , in which Mr. W and friend pursue a baddie on a French-style 
motor scooter He wears a dorky helmet, which is a good thing. His friend tells her father that HE KEEPS FALLING OFF. [Thank God the action doesn’t take place in Manhattan, and that Mr. McCoy has learned to hold on]. Strong points of this movie are a nearly-black shaggy mane, a general bohemian look and a frequent, soulful expression.
 
Their mission was a sham. Their murders were real.When released, this was how the film Capricorn One was promoted. At the time [1978] it was cutting edge and shocking, but what one finds now is an almost laughable film about the faked Mars landing. [This is based on conspiracy lovers’ theories that the 1969 moonlanding was 
faked in the way presented in the movie.] Which is to not say that there aren’t any interest points in this film. Our Sam looks adorable in his space suit, and on the back of the tape’s slipcover is a picture 
of the three astronauts. Mr. W looks like a skinny little infant 
compared to James Brolin and O.J. Simpson. His character is the most lovable of the three--a wise cracking smart-ass, always ready with a bad joke. When on the run from the bad guys, he encourages himself by telling that god-awful cat joke. His character almost deserves to die for that alone. Those that thought O.J. got away with murder can be slightly comforted by the fact he is the first of the trio to die. All-in-all, a fun, waste-of-time rainy day movie.
 
 
 
THE BAD BAD MOVIES
 
Journey into Fear has GOT to be the biggest waste of talent ever 
presented on celluloid. The gifted cast includes Mr. W, of course, but also Shelley Winters, Sterling Holloway, Vincent Price [oh, Vinnie! How could you!?], Zero Mostel, Donald Pleasance, and Yvette Mimieux, who sings a perfectly dreadful song--off-key, of course. There are beautiful Sam-scenes: the now-classic bathtub scene [damn you, Mostel!], his glorious mane of hair crawling up a column like a squirrel as he attempts to duck a bullet, his running gazelle-like through the Grecian ruins to escape a gunman, his super-tight polyester rear as he attempts to climb over a wall. But my favorite scene has got to be Vincent Price crooning his trademarkedEvil to Sam about the hopelessness of his situation. If you want to watch a good movie, find the original 1942 version starring Orson Welles. If you need to ogle Sam,this is your movie.
 
Generations was probably stale in the 1960’s when it was produced. 
This is a boring movie, which to me is the mortal sin of cinema. It is 
the story of a young man and woman who love and wed a week before their 
baby is born. Her father tries to tame his hippie daughter, and to 
convert the young couple to the world of convention. Dad looks like a narc and the kids look like parents’ idea of what a hippie should look 
like. There is only one saving scene in this movie, and this is where our Sam is essential. This is a very early movie for our Man, and his part is tiny--but great. He plays the leader of a sound cult who wants to add the vibrations of the baby to their collection. To see Sam clattering about in an Assisi sackcloth robe and Bozie shoes is amazing. But the highlight is when Mr. W meets our narc. He loses it because of the dissonance emitting from narc. “How can you allow this to happen to your own father!” Unless you are a true film collector, pass this one up! It’s very difficult to find and is usually expensive. But that scene is definitely worth having. Check with friends and fellow collectors for possible trading.
 
 
Savages: This movie reminds me of the classic Dan Ackroyd Saturday 
Night Live skit, “Bad_________”. In this routine, Ackroyd’ s 
character would critique Bad Conceptual Theatre or Bad Performance Art or any number of bad “art” projects. This is an Ismail Merchant film 
[produced before his Merchant-Ivory days], and is guilty of bad art film in the first degree. In the film’s beginning, “a naked, clay-covered band of primitives is disturbed from their sacrifices by the sudden appearance of a croquet ball. Searching for its origin, they arrive at a deserted mansion, which begins to have a civilizing effect on the savages. Each takes his or her role in civilized society, becoming grand ladies and gentlemen of politics and passions. But how much difference is there between a primitive and a civilized man? Before the day is over, the SAVAGES will find out.”[From video’s slipcover].
 
 
THE UGLY
 
This entire section can be summed in two words: 
 Heaven’s Gate 

What do you think? Email me!
 
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