WHAT GOD EXPECT OF A WOMAN?NLŠ

Today as women we need to rediscover the plan of our Designer. Before we can fulfill our distinct feminine identity we must admit that trying to live in our own terms and by our own terms doesn't work.

Before we can find real fulfillment we must be willing to change our minds about where hope is found, then go back to the pattern and the shelter of the One who created both men and women for Himself. {Psalms 91:1-6}.

The Bible offers that plan. It shows us how to live with dignity and serenity. It urges us to experience the difference the Lord can make in our lives.

The scriptures introduce to us many women including, prophetess, queens. singles, wives, mothers and even converted prostitutes.

The bible honors the high calling of women, who choose to marry, have children and nurture them for God. But it also makes it clear that for some the single life is better. Both Jesus and the Apostle Paul show that you can be single and remain faithful to your sexual identity, while living single.

The scriptures as well show that it is foolish to say that a woman should never lead, be strong, or assert herself. Deborah, Abigail, Huldah, and Esther are all examples of women who knew how and when to assert themselves in a godly way. It is just as unthinkable to suppose a real man should not be sensitive, emotional, compassionate and responsive to the needs of others Moses, David, Jesus and Paul all expressed emotions of compassion and gentleness.

In short God made men and women to be much the same yet significantly and wonderfully different. Even though the scope of the differences is difficult to determine and even though many are cultural defined, the Bible is very strong in maintaining the distinctions.

Distinction in Appearance {Duet. 22:5}

Moses warned against cross-dressing. He said that a woman must not wear man's clothing, nor a man a woman's clothing. Since both men and women wore flowing robes in Eastern culture, we should not jump to Western conclusions. It's doubtful that the principal in Dueteronomy 22:5 would forbid women from wearing slacks and men from wearing kilts. Yet it certainly means neither sex should wear anything for the purpose of looking like the other.

The Apostle Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 11:14,15  Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him? 11:15 But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering. Here the scriptures do not provide basis for "legalistic" criticism. Paul doesn't say how long is too long or how short is too short. Instead he appeals to nature itself, implying that at some point masculine and feminine distinctions become a self-evident issue.

Distinction in Roles

Is a woman's place in the home? Is that really where she can find her God given role? The answer depends on whether or not she is married, has children who need her care, and whether or not the husband is able to provide for the basic needs of the home. Women like Ruth, Priscilla, and Anna are among many Biblical women who had roles outside of them home.

Yet nothing should diminish the honor of the woman who does choose to marry, have children, manage the home, and use it as a place of Christian hospitality. {1 Timothy 5:10,14} Nothing should be said to discourage the mother who believes she can best serve her children by being there when they need her. The fact that many women don't have that option should not be reason to rule out the ideal. These women should be encouraged to find fulfillment in the very important profession of raising children and managing the home. Is it to say that women must "stay at home" and honor her husband as the head of the house because she is less intelligent or capable than a man is? Individual intelligence has nothing to do with it. It's a matter of God's design for families.

Selective Submission

The idea of submission is difficult for many women to deal with. But it should help if a woman can know for sure that [1] this is really what God wants, [2] she has not only an opportunity but a responsibility to be selective in carrying out such an assignment.

Let's first take a look at what the Bible says about the kind of submission God expects of a married woman. It involves a response that goes beyond that goes beyond the universal principal of Christian submission. After making it clear that mutual submission is a mark of spirit-filled relationships Paul went on the say: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 5:24 Therefore, as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Ephesians 5:22-24.

From God's point of view this kind of submission is not negotiable. It is not just a question of what a woman committed herself to when she spoke her marriage vows. The Word of God says unmistakably that a wife is to follow the lead of her husband just as her husband is responsible to love her as Christ loved the church. Eph. 5:25. Obedience and recognition of a husbands leadership comes with the territory of being a Christian wife. {1 Corn.11:1-3}

The apostle Peter wrote that such submission is right even if a husband is not being the kind of Godly, loving, sacrificing person he should be. {1 Peter 3:1'2} This is one side of the issue. The other side is that this submission should be active and selective. Obviously God does not ask all women to submit to all men at all times in all places.

What if a husband tells his wife to do something that is in direct conflict with her responsibility to God? What if he asks her to lie, indulge in certain sexual acts, sign papers she knows to be false? She must take a firm stand, while trying to maintain her dignity and gracious spirit. { 1 Peter 3:1} She must let her husband know that her first responsibility is to remain true to her Lord, the Lord after all is the one who holds her security in the palm of His hand.

A husband may die, suffer a stroke, have an accident, or become unfaithful. How then can a woman find her security in mere man? She can if her submission to her husband mirrors her willingness to submit to the Lord.

What about the Abused Woman?

An abused woman should never think that it is her Christian obligation to remain passively silent. When threatened or injured, she should not hesitate to seek protective counsel and shelter. Being a Christian does not mean that she has a spiritual obligation to endure abuse. The Lord doesn't ask a woman to passively endure marital or sexual violence. This kind of violence is not the same as suffering persecution for the sake of the gospel. We must not allow ourselves or other women to live in bondage and fear. No man has the right to take selfish and heartless advantage of a woman. Furthermore, no woman does a man a favor by allowing him to continue in his sin until finally shaken by an angry God.

Equal in Honor

Differences of roles do not necessarily imply differences of honor or worth. Being submissive does not imply inferiority of person. Jesus showed us that. He lived on earth "under the law" {Galations 4:4} under the authority of His parents {Luke 2:51} under the authority of government leaders {Matt 22:21}, and above all under the authority of His heavenly Father. Christ did not diminish His honor by living the servants role. He did not become less than God when he temporarily laid aside His splendor and took on the form of a servant {Phil 2:2-8}

In this way, Jesus gave woman a precedent for believing that her supportive role does not in any way signal we are less of a person, less in honor, or less in potential. We are merely different in form and role for the purpose of carrying out the distinct design and purposes of God.

Does God Expect Too Much?

Many women feel this way. They know they can't be all that God wants them to be. They are ready to give up before they even start. So what is the answer? Does God expect more than a woman can give? He requires behavior that demands superhuman stregnth. He expects a woman to have attitudes that are beyond our ability. He maintains standards we can never measure up to.

Yet, God is understanding, loving, graciously merciful. He doesn't just point out demandingly at the messes we have made. He doesn't practice spiritual blackmail with a mile long list of out sins. Through Jesus Christ, He stoops with love and grace to the lowly person. Through the inexpressibly painful death of His son, He offers forgiveness, complete and irrevocable. Then He offers to do in us everything He asks us to do {1Thes. 4:1-8}. Through the good news of Jesus Christ God offers hope, life strength and status to all women and men who will admit their need for the Savior and surrender to His mercy. That is where we must begin, Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and be saved {Acts 16:31}. Begin and end with God who doesn't ask for anything He doesn't also freely give.