tuesday, october 29
	my friend wing is a smart guy.  unfortunately he lost his job a few months ago, but during his time off, he went swimming at his apartment complex and got a gorgeous tan, worked out a lot and got buff, hung out with friends, and now he's down in irvine hanging out with peg and her family and friends for who knows how long.  he's been there for a week already, and looking at the pictures on her site, he looks like he's having a nice relaxing time.  then i think to myself, why didn't i spend a week in irvine with peg while i was unemployed?  *darn*  by the way, i've added a dream.  it was an odd one. happy birfday to my friends tony and oli! i've been having freaky thoughts in my head these past couple of weeks.  i think it's because of halloween and the little spooks in the air.  do you ever have the feeling that someone is walking past you from behind and you just miss them when you turn around?  or you feel someone creeping up behind you and you SWEAR you see their shadow in your peripheral, but you look to the side and there's no one there?  well i've been feeling that A LOT these days.  it's freaking me out.  you might think i'm a bit crazy... and yes i do feel like i am at times...  hopefully these little spooks stop haunting me after thursday. ~ i know i've been quite a downer these days, and it's easy to forget how good i have it.  so here are some things i am thankful for... longer list to come on thanksgiving.  hehe a wonderful pair of parents quick internet connection taco bell crunchy tacos a job a roof over my head and a warm duvet that covers me at night this website which has allowed me to keep in touch with old friends and meet new i-net friends a brother that cares a heater that warms me at the foot of my desk my nephew caleb's infectious giggle and of course, the lub of my life, parkin ~ last night at the gym, my friend rosa was chatting with me while we were doing cardio.  she popped up with the question, "you really  love with parkin, huh?"  i looked at her and said, of course i do.  "but it's not like you just love each other, but i can tell that you are still IN LOVE with him.  you don't see that a lot, especially after so many years of being in a relationship.  it's cool"  i smiled at the thought of her statements.  it's true tho, i think i have grown to love parkin more everyday.  my stomach still flutters when we kiss, i still get giddy when he kisses me on my neck, and even if it's just for a moment or two, i love being in the security of his warm arms when we're together in a random place when i can lean my head on the crook of his chest and neck.  it's like that little spot was formed just for me.  just the touch of him warms me inside and out.  he's my own personal heating pad.  and when i'm in the lowest of moods, he can give me this look, this smile, and this sparkle forms in his eyes.  he pecks me on the cheek and i try to hide it, but there is nothing i can do but surrender a smile. ~
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