PASSION FOR ART
Passion for the art is abput doing what you love, it dosent necissarly have to be actual art. Anything can be art, chewing gum can be an art if you look at it that way. Personally i think life is art, its visual, its real with touch, loud with noise but at the same time it can be increadably dream like. Love is a gift given to this sinful world to help pass the time. its passion. passion for people for objects for anything you want it to be. atr the same time its increadibly dissapointing. Like love, the word rolls off my tounge as though i cant stop saying it but i can help but feel as if i hate the word. just like life.
i love movies, i love to sit and watch them all day, horror movies are my favorite. bloody and gorey thats how i like them. the asian extreme films are good, they have these twists at the end which makes it really hard to understand. love movies make me kind of sad. i think im to cynical for them, but they make you actually believe there is someone out there who is actually going to love you for the rest of your life. when will teenage girls get the hint that its never going to happen. i wish mt friend daniella would understand that. she swears she loves her boyfriend and that he loves her, she gets excited when he says he wants to marry her and crys when they brake up. i just wanna slap her and say "hes probably cheating on you!! duh hes a guy! and i highly doubt you are ever going to marry him and if you do it wont be suger plums like you think!! get over it!!!" which i know is very mean, but i cant help how bitter i am. instead i shut my mouth and think it all in my head. same for my friend jessica who just had a baby last month, and shes only 17. shes so stupid but what can i do but try to be a goodfriend. it makes me so mad when i think about it, but shes dumb and needs to learn and suffer from her mistakes. i pray to god i graduate on time. i have to finish math in adult school and im suppost to be done this month but im not gonna make it. im scared and it really bugging me. i try to explaint to my parents how it works but theyre not getting it and theyre starting to get me nurvouse.
the girl that sits a couple of chairs down from me is nancy and i think she is very pretty. sometimes i feel ugly compared to her. but then again i always feel ugly, i wish i had the ceratin body and looks that i wanted. i have this new book that my friend brian gave me and its really intresting. its called the perks of being a wallflower and the whole book is letters to someone from some boy named charlie. i like it cuz he writes just like me. all random. i cant stop missing my ex boyfriend juan. i hate him so much it makes me sik, but i still have love for him. i want to pull my hair out i get so mad about how often i think of him. GOD make him go away.im so hungry, i need to get my stomach back on track. im on an anerexia diet. the day is going by pretty fast.