Thur, June 1, 2000
12:37 am HST
mood:
yumm: Meatloaf and rice
pages: Waiting by Ha Jin (I read really slow ok? ;P)
song: Fairytales by Alice DJ
film: Species
look:
My sister is so cute
to do:
- Pay for plane ticket
- Deposit money
- Meet up with Tanya
- Finish my resume
- Clean my room for the fumigators
- Study for the GRE
the list:
- Hike Diamond head
- Hike Manoa Falls trail
- Hawaiian Waters Park
Venus 5/24- Pipeline
Oceans 5/18- Eat at Sorabol
- Tantalus
- Waimea Bay / Matsumoto's Shave Ice
- Go to the Swap Meet
Eat Jja Jang Myun 5/5- Mai Tai bar
- Go out with Davee
- Go to noraebang
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Its funny how I thought I wasn't going to get to talk to
Paul for a month and now I get to
talk to him like everyday ever since he got back from Japan. He apparently had tons of fun in Japan and is now suffering
from withdrawl since in Korea he is far from all the action. Silly foo. And he still continues to talk about ped girls, even
more so now since he met a lot in Japan. haha. Maybe that month with him away from a computer would've been good for my mental
state. haha But its nice to hear all his stories of all his exploits in Japan and Korea. *sigh* if only I could be in Korea
again.
I'm getting sick. All that partying and lack of sleep has finally gotten to me. Plus when I was at Jon's house I had the
fan blowing on me. Or maybe Jon was sick too? I dunno. All I know is that now my throat is all scratchy and I have that
phlegmy taste in my mouth. YUCK. I'm gonna try taking contac all the time like I did last time I started getting sick. Yay
for drugs =)
So today I didn't get to the bank cuz I was way too tired to do anything. I've just been so lethargic today. I only went
out once today and that was to mail my creditcard payment. Even then I was falling asleep at the wheel. Isn't that bad? So
then I took a nap at about 5:30p and woke up 3 hours later. Its funny how my parents thought I had gone out again. And speaking
of that...my sister hasn't been home in a while either. She comes and then goes out again for days at a time. Sheesh, when I
was her age I still had a curfew of midnight on nonschool nights. I had that all the way up to my 2nd sem of college!
This brings me to the subject of oldest and youngest siblings. It has been my observation that by the time the youngest
child grows up, the paretnts are probably so tired from the older kids that they begin to allow the youngest to get away with lots of things
they would never have allowed with the older ones. Its either that or they favor the youngest. Take my situation for example.
My sister has been constantly breaking her curfew that was set at 10p on school nights and 12a on nonschool nights. This was
actually my old curfew too, so I made sure my parents imposed it upon her too. Its only fair. ;P But she has this job where
she gets out really late, even on school nights, but I suspect that after a while she would just use that as an excuse and was
probably just at her bf's house. aish. But the rents never really said anything. They just told her to be home earlier and
that was it! Then later, after she got caught sleeping with the bf, she would be at his house and fall asleep and miss her
curfew then call home after she woke up to say she was coming. My parents didn't really scold her for that either. Gosh was
I mad. And now...NOW she doesn't even come home for days on end and my parents don't say anything again. Maybe its just cuz
she's getting kicked out at the end of the month anyway. aish. Its not fair.
Then take Rose's situation. Her
brother, who is the same age as my sister, has this gf and both their families have gotten really close that they treat each
other like in-laws already. There were a lot of the gf's family at that grad party on Sunday. Rose's parents let him sleep
over at her house or whatever but then they treat Rose entirely differently. Rose's mom really doesn't like her bf George,
probably cuz he's black, and her mom just doesn't trust her anymore saying that she's gotten too rebellious. So why does the
older sibling have to take all the heat? Are we just the test subject where parents can work out the kinks in their approaches
to handling problems? Why is it that the youngest sibling can get away with murder with no more than a small scolding? It's
not fair says I. I demand justice! Actually, I think i've been demanding too much justice. My sister gets so mad at me when
I do that. Like when I got them to impose that curfew on her she was outraged. keke. Well, I had to endure it, why can't she?
But I shouldn't worry about it anymore. My sister is moving out soon and so am I. Just two months and 6 days until I leave.
I reserved my plane ticket today. It was more expensive than I thought it would be but since its summertime I guess
I shouldn't be so optimistic. It cost 199 and I'll have to go pay for it tomorrow. I'm gonna be flying Hawaiian this time around.
Whee. Last time it was United (ghetto) and before that it was Delta. I've heard Hawaiian is pretty ghetto too, but I suppose
everything is better than ATA. I haven't ever seen an ATA plane, but from what I hear, the whole airline is nothing but
trouble. Rose refuses to ever fly it. haha. So I think I'll just follow her lead and claim that too.
Gosh I'm so broke from these expenses though. I just got an email today saying that we now have to pay something like
$325 to turn on the water? Aigo. I never liked having money problems which is why I always avoided them..until now. But I'm
lucky I guess cuz I have lots of people offering to help me if I need it. But I hate borrowing money. I never like depending
on people too much when I don't have to, especially when it comes to money. Money is the cause of all evils.
I'm just worried about moving. At this point in time its too late to turn back. Not that I want to back out, but just
knowing that that path is no longer available makes me uneasy. I hope everything will turn out fine. I'm sure it will be. I
have lots of people to keep me company up there and it will be just like one big vacation right? =) I don't know what I'm going
to do about not having a computer though. I'm gonna die. haha. I really wish I could've saved the money I am spending on june and
july rent for that computer I was planning to buy. Boohar. Plus won't you miss me not updating all the time about my boring
life? ;P I guess I'll just have to buy another book to have as my journal for when I move. I'm sure I'll have tons to talk about
then. keke.
I think this moving away deal is going to my head though. I was telling Rose how that whole deal with Jon wasn't even that
serious. Plus Min was wondering how I
could get all bent out of shape about it back in September and then not even bat an eye this time. He sort of implied that I
was easy, which I am definitely not (but I probably could be if I wanted hahaha), but my reasoning is that I'm leaving soon
so I don't really care about what I do anymore. Rose said that's how she feels all the time, I guess since she's
always here for such a short period of time. Its so funny. Oh well, I better live it up now right? =)
I was also thinking about the presence of the military in SF. Are there any military bases near there? Is there a large
military population there? God I hope not. I don't think there is though since whenever I'm there I never see any. I just really
need to get away from the military and I'm so glad I'm going away soon. I grew up attending schools where a majority of the
population were military brats. You'd think I'd get used to the idea of people moving away every few years and losing contact with them forever.
heh. I just don't like the military though, especially the guys, like those that I meet at the clubs. Ugh. They just have
this persona about them where they think they are the
shit and are almighty and above us all. I think someone needs a reality check. Just because they fight for and protect our country
doesn't mean I have to like them right? I had a conversation with Will one time and I told him how I wish the military would just
leave Hawaii. He came back at me arguing that Hawaii would be lost without the military and that the economy would just collapse.
See what I mean about being arrogant? Like the military has THAT much power that Hawaii can't survive without it. I mean, yeah, the
economy would probably suffer a great deal if the military left, and there would definitely be no one to protect us from attacks
since we're in the middle of the Pacific, but to imply that the military is the backbone of Hawaii society is just a total farce.
Yeah, can you tell I don't like the military much? I just wish they would all go away. I always will consider the military as
my last desperate choice if I end up heavily in debt and on the verge of being homeless. hahaha. Even despite the GI bill and huge
bonuses I won't join. "She'd rather get rectal cancer"-Joy Luck Club ;P
Anyway, I've just been home all day and I was surfing around and I have started to worry that maybe my new design is too much
like other journals. I'd hate being accused of copying. But I really didn't, I promise. But if you think its too similar
tell me and I'll try to think of a new layout or something. I dunno. *sigh* Oh,
and I never told you...in that image at the top..the Korean writing that you can't see well since I wanted it that way says
"nae saenghwal-ee-ya..." or "its my life..." Well, at least that's what I think it means. If I'm wrong, please tell me cuz my Korean
speaking abilities have only been going downhill since I last used it a semester ago. Much boohar.
Ok, I think I should sleep now. All that partying has severely shot my sleeping pattern and I have been sleeping at 4am
every night. Now its 2 and I should rest so I can effectively fight this cold. Take care everyone. Don't get sick!
<3 always,
marsbars
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