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WHO AM I
WHO AM I ??? I AM ABOUT 8 INCHES LONG. MY
FUNCTIONING IS
ENJOYED BY MEMBERS OF BOTH SEXES.
I'M USUALLY FOUND HUNG, DANGLING LOOSELY, READY
FOR INSTANT ACTION.
I BOAST A CLUMP OF LITTLE HAIRY THINGS AT ONE END AND A SMALL HOLE AT
THE OTHER END.
IN USE, I'M INSERTED ALMOST ALWAYS WILLINGLY, SOMETIMES SLOWLY,
SOMETIMES QUICKLY, INTO A WARM FLESHY, MOIST OPENING.
THERE I'M THRUST IN AND DRAWN OUT AGAIN AND AGAIN MANY TIMES IN
SUCCESSION, OFTEN QUICKLY AND ACCOMPANIED BY SQUIRMING BODILY
MOVEMENTS.
ANYONE FOUND LISTENING IN WILL MOST SURELY RECOGNIZE THE RHYTHMIC,
PULSING SOUND, RESULTING FROM THE WELL LUBRICATED MOVEMENTS.
WHEN FINALLY WITHDRAWN, I LEAVE BEHIND A JUICY, FROTHY, STICKY WHITE
SUBSTANCE, SOME OF WHICH WILL NEED CLEANING FROM THE OUTER SURFACES OF
THE OPENING AND SOME FROM MY LONG GLISTENING SHAFT.
AFTER EVERYTHING IS DONE AND THE FLOWING AND CLEANSING LIQUIDS HAVE
CEASED EMANATING, I RETURN TO MY FREELY HANGING STATE OF REST, READY
FOR
YET ANOTHER BIT OF ACTION.
HOPEFULLY, I WILL REACH MY BRISTLING CLIMAX TWICE OR THREE TIMES A
DAY.
BUT OFTEN IT IS MUCH LESS
WHO AM I ???????????
AS YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY GUESSED, THE ANSWER TO THE RIDDLE IS NOE OTHER
THAN YOUR VERY OWN
TOOTHBRUSH !!!!! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, YOU PERVERT.
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Something for your funny bone
Q:
How many animals can you fit into a pair of Pantyhose?
A: 10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 ass, 1 beaver, an unknown number
of hares, and a fish no one can find.
A WHALE TALE
A male whale and a female whale were swimming off the coast
of
Japan when they noticed a whaling ship. The male whale
recognized it as the same ship that had harpooned his
father many years earlier.
He said to the female whale, "Lets both swim under
the ship and blow out of
our air holes at the same time and it should cause
the ship to turn over and sink."
They tried it and sure enough, the ship turned over
and quickly sank.
Soon however, the whales realized the sailors had jumped
overboard and were swimming to the safety of shore.
The male was enraged that they were going to get away
and told the female "lets swim after them and gobble them
up
before they reach the shore."
At this point, he realized the female was becoming
reluctant to follow him.
"Look," she said, "I went along with the blow job,
but I absolutely refuse to swallow the seamen."
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