HUMOR Digest - 15 Aug 1997 to 16 Aug 1997

Date: Fri, 15 Aug 1997 02:31:17 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: School Daze

"What's the difference between a nail, a screw and a bolt ?" the shop teacher asked the only girl in the class during the first day of school.

She pondered the question for a moment, then replied, "Well, can't rightly say as I know, 'cause I ain't never been 'bolted'."

After the first week of sex education class, a young shapely teen stormed out of the room after the class was over.

Encountering a female friend in the hall, the friend asked, "Lori, what in the world is the matter with you ? You look as if you're about to kill someone."

"I am !!!" Lori fumed. "You just wait until I catch up with that Dennis. All summer long, that clown had me convinced that 'foreplay' involved tossing a coin for position."

A diamond-in-the-rough freshman from Texas on a scholarship to Harvard stopped a young man in a blazer and asked "Say, kin yew tell me whar thuh library is at ?"

"Look here." said to soon-to-be Yuppie. "You may have been raised in a culturally deprived backwater, but this is Harvard. We do not end a sentence in a preposition."

"Awright then," drawled the Texan, "Kin yew tell me whar thuh library is at -- asshole ?"

The young couple was experimenting with sex for the first time.

The boy was getting frustrated.

He said "Maybe I'm not the world's leading expert on sex, but things might improve some if you'd just grind your ass instead of your teeth."

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