Boudreaux & Thibodaux Jokes
One day Boudreaux walked into Thibodaux's house & asked him may what's that in ya front yard?? Thibodaux said "may it a helicopter." Boudreaux says "may a helicopter. What it do?" Thibodaux say "come see I show ya." They walk in the yard. Thibodaux gets in and takes off strait up into the clouds. After a while Boudreaux hears a loud noise and Thibodaux and helicopter come crashing down. So Boudreaux walks around and finds Thibodaux laying on da ground all cut-up. Boudreaux asks "may Thibodaux what happen? " Thibodoux say "may Boudreaux I was going up in dat helicopter der and it got cold so I turned off the fan!!!!!!" :)
Boudreaux, Thibodaux & St. Pierre been on dis island for 5 long years. One day St. Pierre was walking along da beach when he found dis bottle. He brought it to da camp dey built and opened it. A genie popped out and said,"I grant 3 wishes and since there are 3 of ya'll, you each get 1 wish. Since you found me,St. Pierre,you get the first wish."St. Pierre said,"I am from Cut Off and I wanna go back home." So den he was back home.Thibodaux said,"I am from Galliano and I wanna go back home." So den Thibodaux was back home. Boudreaux,him, he had to think a while. He said,"You know sha, I am kinda lonley, I wish my 2 podnas were back here!"
One day Boudreax and Thibodaux were watching TV. A good commercial about a movie came on and it said, "Coming To A Theatre Near You." Boudreaux looked at Thibodaux and said, "Thib how they know where we live?"
One day Boudreaux was walking in the woods and got eaten by a bear. He went to heaven and the gate keeper told him, "Boudreaux you have to get your name in the book, but to get your name in, you have to answer three questions. First question is How many days start with a T?" Boudreaux said, "Dat easy, dere is 4, Today, Tomorrow, Tuesday, and Thursday." The gate keeper said "Ok, next one is how many months are there in a year?" Boudreaux said, "12." The gate keeper said "Now the last one is What is God's name?" Boudreaux said, "Oh dat one is easy, its Howard." The gate keeper said, "Now Boudreaux why you said his name is Howard?" Boudreaux said, "I got it from dat ting dat says, Our father howard be thy name!"
Boudreaux and Thibodaux were walking down a country road when they came upon a young woman with a flat on her bicycle. Boudreaux stopped to help her with a flat and Thibodaux continued on down the road. Soon after, Boudreaux came riding up on the bike and Thibodaux asked him what happened. " Well" said Boudreaux, "I stopped and fixed de flat for dat chick and after i did dat, she took off her panties, lay down in de grass and told me to take whatever I wanted. I chose dis bicycle." Thibodaux said, "Me friend, you did just the right thing, cause dem panties probably wouldn't have fit you anyway."
Boudreaux was at the bar every day drinking beer. Well Thibodaux wanted to teach Boudreaux a lesson, so he told the bartender to give him a glass of water and a glass of beer. Thibodaux went outside and found two worms. He put one in the water and it wiggled around, he put the other one in the beer and it curled up and died. Thibodaux asked Boudreaux, "What did you learn?" Boudreaux said, "If I keep drinking beer I wont get worms."
Boudreaux ran for the town council down in Mamou and won over Thibodaux in a close race. At the first council meeting, there was only a 50 watt bulb in the meeting room and some of the council were complaining that they didn't have enough light to even read the agenda. A motion was made and seconded to buy a chandelier for the council chambers but before the vote was taken, Boudreaux asked why they wanted to spend $46.88 for something to put in the meeting room when it was so dark in there, you couldn't see the doggoned thing anyway!
One day Boudreaux and Thibodaux were at the bar and every time Thibodaux would drink a beer he would look in his pocket. Boudreaux asked Thibodaux "Why everytime you drink a beer you look in your pocket?"
Thibodaux said" Me have a picture of my wife in me pocket and when she looks better me will go home.
Boudreaux was walking down the wharf and he met up with Thibodaux. He says to Thibodaux, "Hey podna, how ya'll are?" Thibodaux says, "May ok." Boudreaux says,"And hows your wife?" Thibodaux says, "May my wifes an angel." Boudreaux says"You lucky, my wifes still living!"
Boudreaux and Thibodaux died and went to Heaven. When they got to the Gate, they met ol' Saint Pete. They said, "Saint Pete, beb, how you been?" and Saint Pete said, "Mais ok, sha, but ah got bad news for you Boudreaux. You been so bad on Earth, you got to spend all Eternity with a ugly woman." Boudreaux was pretty sad but he said, "Well, if ah hafto, ah hafto." So the next day him and his ugly woman was walking down the golden street when they saw Thibodaux and he was with Cindy Crawford! So Boudreaux went talk to Saint Pete. He said, "Saint Pete, sha, come see. Ah think we got a mistake here. How come Thibodaux gets Cindy Crawford and Ah got stuck with a ugly woman!" Saint Pete said, :"Aw, Boudreaux, you dont understand! Cindy Crawford got stuck with Thibodaux!"
Thibodaux was driving down the street one day when he seen a roadblock with a cop standing by a barricade. He walked up to the cop and asked "Whats going on?" The cop told Thibodaux "O.J. Simpson was in the middle of the street. He's depressed about losing his money and says he will douse himself with gasoline and set himself on fire. We're taking up a donation for him." Thibodaux told the cop "O.K. I got a gallon in my truck."
Thibodaux & Boudreaux go fishing in the lake. Boudreaux catches a lamp. So Thibodaux says Boudreaux rub the lamp to see what happens. A genie pops out and says you have 1 wish. Boudreaux says we could use a lot of money. Thiboduax says wait Boudreaux lets think of something real good, its hot and we are in the middle of the lake with nothing to drink. Lets turn the whole lake into beer. Boudreaux says no. Thibodaux says why not. Boudreaux says because we are going to have to pee in the boat.
One day Boudreaux and Thibodaux were in a bar celebrating. The bartender asked what are ya'll celebrating? Boudreaux said Hey cher, me and Thibodaux here put a puzzle together and it only took us two years! The bartender said well dont you think that is a long time to put a puzzle together? Boudreaux and Thibodaux said dats pretty good, cher. Dat puzzle box said 6-11 years.
Boudreaux was waiting by his house cause his wife was missing. Boudreaux heres a knock at the door, so he answers it. His buddy Thibodaux is at the door. Thibodaux says Boudreaux I got good news and bad news. The bad news is we found your wife drowned in the lake. The good news is when we picked her up out the lake she had 3 dozen crabs holding on, so bring some beer we are going to have a crab boil.
Boudreaux and Thibodaux went hunting in the woods. Boudreaux said Thibodaux I need to take a dumb. Thibodaux says go and hide behind that tree. Boudreaux says but Thibodaux what am I suppose to wipe myself with. Thibodaux says use a dollar. A while later Thibodaux says Boudreaux what is taking you so long. Boudreaux says I didn't have a dollar so i had to use 4 quarters.
One day Thibodaux and his family came to the city of New Orleans. Not knowing what to do first, they decided to go to the tallest building they could find. Once in, Mamma went off looking in some shops, while Thibodaux and his son browsed around together. After a bit, they came to these the big ole' Golden Doors. Pa says, Wonda wat dees here doors lead to? So, they stare at the doors for a few seconds until an old woman comes up to them. She pushes a button, the doors open, and she enters. The doors close. They notice numbers above the door start to change: 1........2.........3...stop and then resume back down.3.......2.......1..then the doors open! A beautiful young voluptous woman walks out! Son shouts Wow! Pa! You see that! Pa replies quickly, Yeah son! Hurry! Go get Yer MA!
Boudreaux lived on one side of the bayou and Clarence lived on the other side of the bayou. They were arguing across the bayou. Boudreaux tells his wife, Beb today is going to be the day that I will settle it with Clarence. So Boudreaux gets in his truck, drives to the bridge to cross the bayou. Boudreaux looks up at the sign on the bridge, reads it and goes back home. Boudreauxs wife says Boudreaux did you solve the problem with Clarence. Boudreaux says no beb they had a sign on the bridge that said Clearance 13feet 3inches.
Thibodaux and Boudreaux was talking and Boudreaux says, hey Thibodaux do you know a woman got a YET. Naw says Thibodaux, women aint got a YET. Yea she do says Boudreaux, a woman got a YET. How you know a woman got a YET, says Thibodaux. Cause it say so rat here in da paper,"Woman Shot, bullet in her YET."
Boudreaux walks into a bar, and says anybody got the number for 911. Thibodaux says whats the emergency. Boudreaux says is that your truck with the Great Dane in it. Thibodaux says yes why. I got some bad news for you podna. My dog killed your dog. Thibodaux says what kind of dog you got. Boudreaux says a Chihauhau. Thibodaux says explain to me how your dog can kill my Great Dane. Boudreaux says he got stuck in his throat.
Boudreaux and Thibodaux go ice fishing. They stop at a store on the side of the road and ask the cashier where they can go ice fishing. The cashier says there is a frozen lake across the road and I got bait and ice picks to break the ice to fish. An hour later Boudreaux goes to the store to buy some more ice picks. He tells the cashier i want all the ice picks you have.The guy says are you all catching alot of fish? Boudreaux says Catching a lot of fish! We didnt even launch the boat yet.
Leblanc one day noticed his cat looked a bit ill stricken, so he phoned up the local vet, Thibodaux. Once Thibodaux got there he said, well show me da cat. Leblanc hands him the cat, and Dr. Thibodaux takes a look, he stroked his hands along the right side of the cat, then he stroked his hands along the left side of the cat and finally gives a little touch to the cats head and tail. Well?..Well?....What could it Be? asks Leblanc. Looks like you called me over for nothing, seems da cat just got a hold of some bad catnip or somethin, replied the Dr. Well how much do I owe ya? asked Leblanc. Well I wont charge ya nothin for my services, but it'll be 500 dollars for the Cat-Scan!
One day Boudreaux and Thibodaux were riding down the highway in Boudreaux's pick-up truck when suddenly he pulled over the side of the road. Boudreaux said Hey Thibodaux, I aint sure dem turn signals are workin, cher. Get out back and check it out. Old Thibodeaux gets out of the truck and stands there for about three minutes without saying a word. Finally Boudreaux shouts Hey! Thibodaux, are dey workin, cher. Thibodaux yells back, dey workin....dey not workin..... dey workin.......dey not workin.....?
Boudreaux and Thibodaux were on a weekend hunt when they witnessed a UFO landing. As the little green creatures came out of the UFO craft, Boudreaux said " Mais whats that?" Thibodaux replied as he aimed his gun " I dont know me, but Boudreaux you better go back to the camp and put some rice on!"
Boudreaux was riding along the highway when this truck passes with some pigs in it. One of the pigs fall out. Boudreaux stops to pick up the pig and a state petroleum trooper stops and says Boudreaux what you doing with that pig.
Boudreuaux says a man passed by with a truck load of pigs and one pig fell out. Boudreaux says maybe i catch up with the truck and give the man his pig back.The state petroleum trooper says Boudreaux that man is long gone, why dont you just go to the zoo and bring the pig there. So Boudreaux says ok officer.. A while later the state petroleum trooper sees Boudreaux on the highway with that pig in his truck. He stops Boudreaux and says Didnt i tell you to bring the pig to the zoo. Boudreaux says Officer i did. We had so much fun that i think we are going to go to Astro World.
Boudreaux: "It's terrible what they're doing in the South."
Thibodaux: "What's that?"
Boudreaux: "They're burning all of the churches."
Thibodaux: "That's OK, I always liked Popeye's better anyway!!!"
Boudreaux and Thibodaux were driving on the highway, on their way to go Bear hunting. They come upon this fork in the road, where there was a sign that said, "Bear Left". They turned around and went home.