L U S T
Lust (Gk. “epithumia”) – is an intense desire or longing – Webster’s
New World Dictionary. It can be used
in a good sense (e.g., Phil.
In the ethical
sense, however, lust is used to express sinful desire – sinful either in being
directed toward forbidden objects (e.g., sexual intercourse with someone else’s
wife, illicit drugs, etc.), or in being so violent as to overcome self-control,
and to engross the mind with earthly, carnal, and perishable things (e.g.,
doing anything to get money) – Unger’s Bible Dictionary.
Have you laid aside the old self (put off or died to the unconverted life, or the old style of living you had before becoming a Christian) with (controlled by) its lusts/strong desires of deceit (deceitful self-centered desires)?
Why, and how?
What had they learned to do in
verses 23 and 24?
Have you been renewed in the spirit/attitude of your
mind (thinking right so as to see and
accept spiritual truths) and put on the new self (i.e., become a Christian controlled by the Holy Spirit), so as not
to live the way you used to?
If so, when?
Jas.
Are you being carried away and
enticed (i.e., lured, drawn) by your
own lust (i.e., evil desire)? Why?
Did you realize that each time a
Christian lusts, it’s because he is drawn by his own evil desires (in most cases)?
How does knowing this affect you?
Jas.
[“death”
– This death is a spiritual death or a spiritual separation from God – The
Wycliffe Bible Commentary].
Does knowing the fact that lust is a sin and has its
own consequences affect you in anyway? How?
1 Jn. 2:15, 16 What are we told to do?
Are you loving the things of the world (i.e., the lusts of the flesh, the lusts of the eyes, and the boastful pride of life)?
Do you love getting drunk, over-eating, participating in sexual immorality or illicit drugs?
Or, do you love coveting selfishly possessions, such as clothes, jewelry, cars/trucks, sport equipment, stereos, computers, cell phones, homes, etc. or relationships? If so, what do you plan to do about it, and why?
1 Jn.
What happens to the one who does the
will of God?
[As Christians, we shouldn’t lust because
the world and its lusts are temporary/momentary, and it’s, therefore, a poor
investment, while the one who does the will of God abides forever (has eternal
life with God; has no real ending, unlike the world and its lusts).].
Are
you lusting after the world, or are you doing the will of God in order to gain
eternal benefits/rewards (1 Cor.
Titus 3:3 How does Paul describe these people’s past lives, as well as
his own?
Are you still enslaved to your sinful, lustful
desires? Why?
Are you still disobedient and deceived by your own
lust? Why?
Are you still living the way you once lived, even though Christ has set you free from bondage (i.e., enslavement) to sin? Why?
Jas. 4:2 What are
some other consequences of lusting?
Have you ever envied others (selfish desiring of an advantage that another has, whether it’s a possession, position, or person) because you couldn’t obtain something you lusted for? What was it?
[Lusting
over someone can lead you to fighting, separation, hurt feelings, adultery, or
divorce.].
2 Sam. 11:1-5 Though David was already married
to other women (1 Sam.
What was the outcome or results (vs. 4)?
According to this example, does the
fact that a person is married exclude (keep)
him from lusting? Why?
[If you haven’t controlled sexual
lust as a single person, getting married probably won’t help, and in most cases
it even gets worse. Sexual lust needs to
be dealt with as a single person, and getting married is not a solution for
ending lust (as seen in the cases of David and Samson – Judges 14:1-3; 16:1).].
Have you ever thought that by getting married your
problem with lust would be solved? Why?
Matt. 5:28; Job 31:9-12 Who has committed adultery in his
heart?
Had you realized that to mentally think about having sex (intercourse) with another person other than your spouse is the same as committing the act as far as God is concerned?
What can you do to start viewing people as God’s special creations instead of as sex objects?
1 Pet.
Are you diligently obeying these
commands? Why?
Do you abstain (i.e., refrain) from fleshly lusts, or do you give in to them? Why?
How do you keep from giving in to
them?
Gal.
Are you crucified to the flesh (dead to enslavement to your sin nature from which we have been set free through Christ’s death) with its passions and desires? How?
Gal.
Are you allowing God’s Spirit to control you moment by moment, decision by decision in order not to carry out the desires of the flesh? Why?
If not, what do you think you need
to do, in order for this to be true in your life?
Rom.
Are you doing this? If not, what do you plan to do about it,
and why?
[“To put on the
Lord Jesus Christ” means to be filled/controlled by the Holy Spirit by choosing
as an act of your will to make Christ the Ruler of your life.].
[“To make no
provision for the flesh” is to not set yourself up, to
not make the opportunity available to sin.].
Do you mentally plan ahead as to how you can make it
easy for yourself when you want to sin?
[If you have a problem with sexual lust, don’t go near “X” or “R” rated movie theaters or TV programs, magazine racks and video stores that carry sexually-explicit materials, internet sites, strip joints, etc. If you have a problem with over-eating, don’t go to all-you-can-eat restaurants. If it’s alcohol, stay away from bars or parties where you know it will be present.].
Col. 3:5 According to this verse, what are we to consider dead (i.e., no longer enslaved to)?
[“members of our
earthly body” – a metonymy, the cause or source is substituted for the effect
or product; here, it is what our body member/parts do that is sinful.].
Why (vs. 3)?
[“died”
– our old non-Christian self died when we became a Christian, 2 Cor. 5:17;
Are you considering as dead the members of your
earthly body (e.g., your eyes, mind,
hands, sex organ), so that you’re no longer committing passion/lust (“pathos” – uncontrolled, depraved lust)
because, as a Christian, you are no longer a slave to your sinful nature?
[I no longer have to view women as sex objects or act like a dog, wanting to have sex with every female. I no longer have to feel excessive desire for material things or money because of feeling discontent, unhappy, unsuccessful, or insecure.].
Gal. 5:22, 23 Are
you choosing as an act of your will to apply the fruit of self-control to your
desires, thoughts, and actions, so that you won’t lust? Why?
Do you have the self-control to not
lust when an attractive girl walks by? Why?
If not, how can a person have self-control, so that
he won’t lust (vss. 22, 23; Eph.
Job 31:1 What did Job do, in order to not “gaze at a virgin” (i.e., lust)?
Have you ever made a covenant with your eyes (i.e., as an act of your will, you chose not to look intensely/lustfully at women), in order to help you with your lust problem? Why?
Why do you think it’s so important
to keep our eyes in check, or be careful what we look at?
Rom. 12:2 What does Paul urge these Roman Christians to do?
Are you being transformed (i.e., totally changed from the inside out) by the renewing (i.e., changing to new or God-like) your mind (i.e., your thoughts, attitudes, values, behaviors, and motives)? If so, how?
How can a person renew his mind (Psa. 119:11, 15, 16)?
Are you doing this so that you can
keep your way pure and not lust?
Are you diligently watching what goes into your mind
(e.g., TV, magazines, movies, music,
conversations, etc.), so that you keep you mind
pure? How?
2 Cor. 10:5 Besides
destroying/demolishing speculations (i.e.,
erroneous human opinion; arguments) and every lofty thing (i.e., Judaic self-righteousness and
humanistic, philosophic opinions) raised (i.e., that sets itself) up against the
knowledge (truth) of God (i.e., the truth of the gospel), what
else were they doing?
Are you taking all your thoughts
captive to the obedience of Christ (discarding/rejecting
wrong thoughts)?
Why?
Do you guard your mind and thoughts, so that when lustful thoughts come in, you can get rid of them immediately, or do you dwell on them? Why?
Examples
of how to deal with wrong/sinful thoughts:
If the thought to call a person a creep
comes into your mind, then reject it, and replace it with Eph. 4:29.
If the thought that you should have been
picked to play on the church team rather than so-and-so comes into your mind,
then reject it, and replace it with Phil. 2:3.
If the thought to have sex with someone comes into your mind, reject
it, and replace it with 2 Tim. 2:22.
If the thought to get even with so-and-so comes into your mind, reject
it, and replace it with Rom.
If the thought to gossip comes to mind, reject it, and replace it with
Prov. 20:19.
Psa. 139:23 What did David ask of God in prayer?
Have you ever prayed to God and
asked Him to renew your mind? When,
and why?
2 Tim.
What are we to do instead?
Are you fleeing from youthful lusts (i.e., from someone or some place, because the situation will be tempting to you)?
Or, do you get deceived by Satan and think that you
don’t have a problem with lust or that you can handle it?
Why?
Are you pursuing (i.e.,
striving after) righteousness, faith, love, and peace with godly, spiritual
Christians who can help you and encourage you to have victory over lust? Why, and how?
1 Cor. 7:9 Should a Christian get
married because he has a problem with sexual lust?
First of all, most guys have a
problem with sexual lust from their mid-teens on. However, if it’s totally out
of control (an obsession, probably due to
prior involvement with pornography or sexual experiences), then it would be
better to get married (so as to have a
legitimate means of fulfilling those sexual desires) than to be in the continuous
sin of burning lust.
The word “burn”
in 1 Cor. 7:9 is the Greek word “purousthai” (which is in the present, middle, infinitive
form) meaning: “sexual passion” since it’s used as a metaphor (Dr. A. T.
Robertson, Word Pictures in the New Testament, vol. 4, p. 126); “continuance
in unsatisfied desire” (Dr. M. Vincent, Word Studies in the New
Testament, vol. 2, p. 772); “glowing
with heat emotionally” since it’s used as a metaphor (Drs. Vine, Unger, and
White, An Expository Dictionary of Biblical Words, NT, p. 151); “inflamed with lust” (Dr. W. Perschbacher, The New Analytical Greek Lexicon, p.
360, #4448). Being in the continuous present tense, it means continuous
unsatisfied sexual desire rather than merely an occasional problem of impure
thinking. So, if you merely have a problem with occasional lustful thoughts,
don’t feel like this verse is telling you that you have to get married. Why?
Because occasional lustful thoughts are far different than what this passage is
dealing with (which is
a continuous burning with lust all the time).
Second, Christians should be able
to control their passions since God gave us that ability through the Holy
Spirit’s fruit of self-control (Gal.
Third, since God has told us to
be holy (1 Pet. 1:14, 15), to set our
minds on things above (Col. 3:2), to
dwell on pure things (Phil. 4:8), and
to renew our minds (Rom. 12:2), then
we should be capable of doing this since God is at work in us both to will and
to do of His good pleasure (Phil. 4:13).
Fourth, even if a Christian
doesn’t have the gift of singleness (not
having the desire to get married), he can still choose to remain single for
the sake of the kingdom of God, as it states in Matt. 19:12 (that is, to more devotedly serve God with
less distractions, as marital responsibilities are many, 1 Cor. 7:32-35).
Fifth, it would be selfish (which is not loving, 1 Cor. 13:5) to
get married for the sole or primary reason of simply fulfilling your sexual
desires. The woman/wife would merely be being used as a sex object rather than
for the biblical reason of being a helper to her husband (Gen. 2:18, 20) in his God-given responsibilities (which is where God intended her to find her
fulfillment).
Sixth, most men who are married
find that being married has not helped them to refrain any less from lusting,
and for some, has even increased it. So, getting married is not the solution
for dealing with lustful thoughts. Instead, being filled/controlled by the Holy
Spirit (Eph.
You can be single and satisfied and serve God more
devotedly and undistractedly (1 Cor.
Phil. 4:8 What are we told to let our minds dwell on?
What do you usually daydream about
or meditate on? Why?
Do you have sexual fantasies and
impure thoughts while you lay in bed alone late at night?
Or, do you think about God, His
attributes, or things that are pure, right, lovely… etc.? Why?
True (Gk. “alethe”) means actual, true to fact,
conforming to reality, factual” (Vine, Unger, & White’s, An Expository
Dictionary of Biblical Words, p. 1170). It means not false and has its norm
in God (W. Hendriksen, NT Commentary – Philippians, p. 198).
Examples: Church
history; the kind, gracious, corrective words or actions of people toward
either you or someone else; people’s experiences or lessons learned that could
benefit you morally/spiritually/relationally; people’s words or deeds that
could be spiritually motivating to your well being; the Bible; God’s
attributes; Christian biographies; conversion testimonies.
Honorable (Gk. “semnos”) means a noble seriousness,
worthy of reverence (Wuest’s Word Studies in the Greek New Testament,
vol. 2, “Philippians”, p. 110). It means “dignified, serious – in speech and
behavior (NT Commentary – Philippians, p. 198).
Examples: Either a
sermon on or thinking about on your own, that of reaching the lost with the
gospel; God, Jesus Christ, or the Holy Spirit and their attributes or works;
people’s gracious, kind, or generous acts toward others; Christian people’s
sacrificial giving of themselves (their time, talents, treasures) to build up
and/or train other Christians; the Bible; the Christian’s purpose in life and
priorities; martyrs for the Christian faith; hell, heaven, eternity.
Right (Gk. “dikaios”) means “that which is in
conformity to God’s standards” (J. Walvoord & R. Zuck, The Bible
Knowledge Commentary, NT, p. 664). It means “just, fair, that which is in
harmony with God’s will and law” (NT – Philippians, p. 198).
Examples: Situations
or circumstances where people either said or did the right thing even though
under pressure or tempted to say/do the wrong thing; accomplishing goals or
objectives in a legitimate way; solving a problem or counseling a person the
way God would want; having the proper attitude/motives for something you will be
doing or saying; the Bible; performing some action/decision in a fair or proper
way.
Pure (Gk. “hagna”) means “wholesome, not mixed
with moral impurity” (Bible Knowledge Commentary, p. 664). It means “not
defiled or contaminated, free from fault/sin/evil” (An Expository Dictionary
of Biblical Words, pp. 903, 175).
Examples: How you can
help someone in need because you love them Christianly; edifying conversations,
hymns, or spiritual songs; biblical sermons/speeches; God’s creation or nature
scenes; the Bible; cassette tapes on Christian growth; people as God’s wonderful
creations; living a holy/obedient life for God; how to act biblically/correctly
in different kinds of situations.
Lovely (Gk. “prosphile”) means “what promotes peace
rather than conflict” (Bible Knowledge Commentary, NT, p. 664). It means
“that which inspires love”(Wycliffe Bible
Commentary, p. 1330). It means “pleasing” (An Expos. Dictionary of
Biblical Words, p. 695).
Examples: God’s
creation or nature; how to increase group morale and/or unity; what you could
say to compliment/encourage someone; what someone said/did to comfort or encourage
you; saying or doing something nice for someone who dislikes you; how you can
reconcile a broken relationship; doing a special act of kindness for a needy
person or to someone who’s in full-time Christian work; the Bible; how you can
please your spiritual leader or others.
Good repute (Gk. “euphema”) means “what is positive and
constructive, admirable”(Bible Knowledge Commentary,
p. 664). It means “uttering words of good report or fair-sounding or good
reputation” (An Expository Dictionary of Biblical Words, p. 953).
Examples: Good things
said about another person; a biblical sermon/talk/seminar; someone’s biblical
advice to you or correction of you; the Bible itself; someone’s wise instruction;
helpful lessons learned in life shared; Christian biographies or testimonies;
witnessing experiences; tips on money management to be a good steward for God;
someone’s complimentation of another person.
Excellence (Gk. “arete”) means “virtue; good in it”
(Jamieson, Fausset, & Brown, Commentary on the Whole Bible, p.
1312). It means “moral/spiritual excellence; virtue” (NT Commentary –
Philippians, p. 199).
Examples: People’s
plans to serve God or to obey the Bible; a right decision made; a good deed
performed by someone; a speech said that was biblical (i.e., true, loving,
etc.); character changes in the lives of Christians; Christ-like traits
displayed.
What do you do when a lustful
thought comes into your mind?
Do you dwell on it, or do you get
rid of it, and replace it with good thoughts? How?
Is your mind so polluted with immoral thoughts that you live in a fantasy world, lusting after almost every girl you see, wishing to have sexual relations? Why?
If so, what steps do you need to take in order to
reprogram your mind, so that you can think purely?
When will you start?