SCULLY'S TOP TEN COMPLAINTS ABOUT MULDER (suggested by Cigarette-Smoking-Coughing-Girl)

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by CANCER FAN
10) Keeps crushing empty cans of sunflower seeds against his forehead, thinking I'll be impressed.
9) Every once in a while he spaces off and says to himself: "Ben, why didn't you tell me?"
8) Keeps having the Lone Gunmen over for beers, and you don't want to know how Frohike is when he's drunk.
7) Keeps asking me if I know where the truth is.
6) Pornos, pornos, pornos.
5) Whenever an old girlfriend calls, he tells them I'm his "new main squeeze".
4) Whenever an old boyfriend of mine calls, he tells them my "new main squeeze" is Janet Reno.
3) Every afternoon around two o'clock, Skinner has me walk Mulder around the block and feed him a doggie treat.
2) Won't STOP asking if I know where the truth is.
And my number one complaint about Mulder...
It's been five years and he still won't acknowledge that I'm a woman!


Sometimes it's
hard to be
a woman...



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