MULDER'S TOP TEN TAX TIPS (with apologies to the IRS)

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by CANCER FAN
10) Claim astral projection as a travel expense.
9) The Lone Gunmen count as three dependents.
8) Porno is a business expense, but only if you work with Scully.
7) "Believe the lie."
6) Any parts of the tax forms which mention "withholding" are NOT good places to give testimonials about your abduction experiences.
5) Hair is a deduction, but only if you're Skinner.
4) Auditors are impervious to mental telepathy and psionic manipulation, but not a good bribe.
3) Alien implants do not have to be counted as earned income or gifts, even if you did enjoy being probed.
2) Only Cancer Man can claim Phillip Morris and R.J. Reynolds as dependents.
And number one…
Auditors live by the motto "The Truth Is Out There" too, so don't do too much cheating.


...THAT ALL YOUR PAPER WORK
IS IN THE PROPER ORDER
AND THAT YOU'VE KEPT
YOUR RECEIPTS.



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