Dirty Rotten Number
Lyrics by:  David Yazbek
Music by:  David Yazbek

(CATALINA and KRIS sit together in Connor's apartments, making a toast.)

CATALINA
You may be master of
Your chosen occupation
With several strings of
Polo ponies in your stable-
You must remember all the same
That at the crux of every game
Is knowing when it's time
To leave the table.
And it's important to be artful in your exit-
No turning back, you must accept the con is done,
But now and then, you might recall
The moments when you had it all-
You had the charm,
You had the talent
And, my Din, you had some fun.
It was a ball, it was a blast
And it's a shame it couldn't last,
But every chapter has to end,
You must agree.
It was a joy, it was sublime,
A splendid way to earn a dime
For a dirty rotten guy like me.
When you look back on all your
conquests and deceptions
You see a thousand flawless pearls set in a strand,
Laid out from Hyrule your roam,
Each one as perfect as a poem-
An opus to be proud of though it's written in the sand.
It was a ball, it was a thrill,
You had the grace, you had the skill
To know exactly what to say
And what to do.
You wouldn't trade a single day
Or have it any other way-
A dirty rotten guy like you.

KRIS
It's almost a religion-
The need to take a pigeon
And to play your part
With elegance and zest
But when it's time to fold the act
And your duffel bag is packed
Take comfort in the fact
That you've been working with the best.

CATALINA
It was a blast, it was a ball
It was a gas, I loved it all
'Cause I was hanging with the man
And that's a plus.

KRIS
You've got the verve

CATALINA
You've got the guts-

KRIS
You've go the nerve-

CATALINA
You've got the nuts!

KRIS
I guess we're

BOTH
-Dirty rotten crooks, dirty rotten
shnooks-
It was a trip, it was a blast
It was a shame it couldn't lsat
'Cause it was almost
Too prodigious to discuss.

KRIS
So we get screw for fifty-grand-

CATALINA
I think we still deserve a hand-

BOTH
Dirty
Rotten
Guys-

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