" I will be coming over tonight." His husky voice relayed quietly over the phone. My spine tingle with excitement and I squealed softly to express the cheer overwhelming me. " Later." He replied and hung up. I could not help feeling like a child in a candy store every time I receive his calls simply because his calls are far and few.
I can still remember waking up in his arms. It was a very cozy feeling to open my eyes and find myself being cuddled by a pair of strong protective arms. I tried recalling the hysterics I had on our first night together and a hot flush crept up my cheeks. What kind of magic does this man process, he could change tears into joy in such a short span of time.
A week following that, I had seen none of him. He did not call or visit again. When I try to knock on his door, there was no one at home to answer. I could still listen to him on the radio and watch him on variety shows on tv and that somewhat make not seeing him in the flesh less painful to bear.
As days pass, I start to wonder why he would not call. Initially I consoled myself by convincing myself that he is a very busy man, afterall hosting shows for 7 days a week really doesnt leave him much spare time. But after the sixth day, it became self-blame. What have I done wrong to deserve his cold treatment? I distinctively heard him asking me never to leave him but now he has left me out in the cold!
Hurt turns into cold fury and I bury myself in my work, writing furiously, trying to push memories of him out of my mind. The days reflected the feelings inside me. No longer sunny; the skies are constantly burdened with dark rain clouds breaking into heavy showers.
It was on a rainy Thursday afternoon when I received his call. For a moment I could not recognize the husky voice coming through the phone receiver. " I am coming over this evening."
I could not feel any trace of warmth he had shown me before. Rather I felt I had been passed an order from a higher authority. Accumulated fury made me bold and I would not accept this kind of treatment.
" No." I refuse flatly. Heavy silence follows. I know I should put down the phone to further emphasize my feelings but I hung on for his answer instead.
" I see." He replied calmly then to my surprise, he hung up!
I could not remember what I did after that. I must have cried my heart out for hours. I cannot believe that I was lured into thinking that he is a gentle man whom loves me genuinely. He had made me feel like overnight trash with such simplicity. I should hate him but instead I find myself fearing him more.
