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15a.
His words mystified me. How can he expect a stranger to understand him if he wont talk about himself? That was also the last I seen of him. Although he did not make the effort to avoid me but I seldom get to meet him face to face again. Several times I heard him leaving for work but by the time I opened the door, all I can hear is his receding footsteps down the wooden stairs.
I am still an avid fan of his, watching his every variety shows and listening in on all his radio programs. He is still the same before the media, laughing and joking without a care in the world. The absence of the gloomy sensitive side he had shown me disturbs me severely. My curiosity is evoked and I sense the need to seek out the real him.
Hearing the light scuffling outside, I jumped up from my seat and rushed to the door. Yanking it open, I peeked out in time to see his back view as he descends. It encompasses a lot of unspoken loneliness. I want to know you. I mutter determinedly.
15b.
I would not consider ~ I read aloud, keeping my voice down to a soft murmur. My feet carried me up automatically up the steps as I kept my eyes fixedly on the magazine I am reading in my hand.
What are you reading? A male voice asks a few feet away from me. I jumped with shock and lowered my hand at the same time feeling as guilty as a child caught breaking a vase.
He stood before me, leaning against the metal railing without a smile but looking like a picture of casualness. I try to swallow the lump that is forming in my throat and my face probably grimaced in pain.
Huh? I replied to buy some time.
Thats me on the cover of that magazine. He said lightly, eyeing me with an amused glint in his eyes.
Huh? I replied again not really knowing what to say at all.
You are reading up on me? He asks and I swear that he actually look grateful.
Eh ~ I stammers feeling a blush slowly creeping up my cheeks.
Raising his arm, he glanced briefly at his watch. I have to rush for filming. He explains ruefully. Can I come over tonight?
His sudden request shocked me and I couldnt answer him. Ill see you tonight. He repeats in a firmer tone. Before I can react, hes gone.
Completely mystified, I stood for a good many minutes after he is gone. When I finally woke up from my trance, I look down at the magazine in my hands. The face on the magazine cover is smiling back at me. I will know you. I mutter with newly enforced determination. Even if it means taking a lifetime.
It is after midnight when I finally hear soft knockings at my door. When I open it, he is standing outside the door with a lighted cigarette in his mouth. His hair is wet and his clothes are different from the ones he was wearing earlier in the day.
When he realized that I am still very much awake, surprise registered on his face momentarily. Without a word, he walks in and sat down next to the table in a lordly manner after pulling off his shoes. He did not turn around while I fuss about in the kitchen. His jaw drops slightly when he saw what I had brought to him.
Why? He asks simply while eyeing the peaches I bought.
You like them. I replied plainly. I watched in silent amusement as he picks one up and studies it thoughtfully. Then slowly he took a big bite out of it, gnawing at it like a squirrel with a nut.
We sat in total silence after he finished the peaches. While I was washing the dishes, he had turned on the tv set and busied himself with watching the midnight news in mute. Again I surprised him by putting a glass of transparent liquid before him.
Its shochuu. I replied casually to the light upward tug of both his eyebrows. To my satisfaction, he nodded lightly with approval. Without saying a thing more, I open up a magazine and start reading. I know he must have noticed his photograph on the cover but he chose to remain silent.
Silence prevailed between us as he channel surfed and drank the drink I prepared for him. From the corner of my eyes, I caught the frequent smiles of contentment flitting across his tired face.
Finally after 2 hours, he lie down on the floor and fell sound asleep. The clock reads 4 am when I checked as I got up to bring my duvet from my bed to cover his scrunched up body with. |
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