As the end of November approached, my heart had sank to it's lowest point since August 25th 2001.
My tears were spent but so were my confidence and belief.
I could no longer believe that the matter will come to an end. As far as I was concerned, I will never be able to see Goro again. The thought had been painful. How could I pretend nothing was wrong when the possibilty of not being able to see Goro again loomed ahead?
So what if the other members of SMAP kept up appearances. Their efforts to make up for his absence seem more like a death sentence to Goro. They were doing even better without him! My depression deepened. How could they! In the name of helping him, they had shown the world SMAP without Goro functioned even better! How could anyone expect me to be rational anymore? All I saw was his fate been compromised.
Beginning of December came swiftly. Festivity is in the air as everyone prepared for Christmas.
My world had never look so bleak. Like the moors of England in winter, I could not feel a breath of life in my gray world. I resented ever setting my eyes on him. I resented ever falling for him. I resented the fact that I could not leave him.
Suddenly my world changed. The gloom lifted temporarily. All because Nakai had retorted that Goro would return earlier than expected! No ultimatum was clearly stated but it was better news than I could dare to hope for.
Things start to happen quickly. All kinds of news kept my spirits up. Although none can be confirmed but I had placed my trust in Nakai. Deep in my heart I knew that he had stake his reputation to make such a claim. SMAP ain't gonna let me down. Rumours had it that Goro would return on Christmas eve. Instead Inagaki Junichi san was invited to pave the way for Goro's return. Following that, Nakai and Takuya had made bold decisions to call out to Goro on nationwide television.
The year finally came to an end. My spirits were still high. I remembered the promise Nakai made to us. My eyes shone with gratitude, he will perform a miracle. Speculations flew about the web, when is Goro coming back?
